thedreamer Posted July 1, 2006 Posted July 1, 2006 I've dealt with this guy for a couple months on and off even when he swore he was really into me and he liked me sooo much, we had this crazy sexual attraction, he had a habit of sometimes ignoring my calls or text messages dissapearing for days at a time. For example I would call him and he wouldn't answer and call me back like 3 days later or not at all until i would leave him a message which I sounded nice but upset. Text messages were basically the same. He wouldnt always do this he would spend days being normal then he would start it all over again, the ignoring. So a couple months ago I got really angry because I took him out on his bday slept over his house, gave him slept with him then he called the next day to say thanx for everything and i didnt hear from him again. After a week i got so upset i text him pretty much going off on him he didnt answer & he didnt speak to me again for 2 and a half months until i sent a mass text that i was on MTV to everyone and he told me he was watching, next day on my bday he text me and called and had a long convo about how his life has been we didnt even talk about the fact that he ignored me for 2 months and how hurt I was I didnt want to bring it up. By the way he has a crazy poker obsession he is the ultimate in poker obsessed, so since lately I've gotten really into poker I wanted to learn from a pro so I called him asked him to teach me, he was so happy and so into it, he was in the middle of a game and he stopped it to talk to me which was shocking, when i didnt call him for 2 days he text me & wanted to know if I was serious and he really wanted to teach me etc. we met up went to the movies and dinner even to a bookstore to buy a poker book. He was so sweet and such a gentlemen was talking to me alot being really open seemed to be having a good time, gave me a big hug saying he was happy to see me and he really wants to teach me& we can hang out whenever, didnt try anything not even getting me back to his apt. it also confused me because i couldnt tell if he was still attracted to me or just wanted to be friends which would be weird because this is one of those really good looking guys that has no female friends, he only knows females he has had sex with, he hangs out with nothing but men. So he text me everyday after that for any reason. Then one night he was upset because he came in 2nd in a huge poker tournament & he text me saying he needed someone to talk to even though he had 3 friends with him he wanted to talk to me. I text him while i was at work for 6 hrs trying to make him feel better cuz he was so sad. Next night I called to see if he was ok he didnt answer and didnt call back, after 3 days i called left a message saying that if he cared about me at all he wouldve called back cuz I'm worried, then he called back, had a convo with me like nothing happened then told me he would call back in 10 minutes later, that never happened, a week passed so I left him a polite voice message saying that I cant have a friend that treats me this way etc., that I wish we could become real close but it'll never happen because of how often he does this and how is he suppose to teach me poker when he doesnt even answer his calls when I have a question because within that week I text him twice with questions and he never answered. I said that either he is my friend and he stops doing this or we go our seperate ways. It's been 2 days he never answered to that voice message. I'm just so confused why come back into my life when it was already over and pull the same crap, want to hang out and teach me poker, what is his deal? Also did I jump the gun by leaving that message he seems to be going through a couple problems, but I just felt like there was no excuse to ignore me, if he is going through things just say sorry I cant really talk right now or whatever not just ignore every call every text. He doesnt work a fulltime job he makes all his money off poker he told me himself he has alot of free time, i have guys that are busy as hell and never not call me or text me back. I cant figure him out can any of you??? I'm so sick of the back and forth it gets me stressed. But for some reason I always want him back in my life, like i dont want him completely gone. HELP!!
magichands Posted July 1, 2006 Posted July 1, 2006 I haven't read the book, and I actually grind my teeth if someone even mentions it, but... It really sounds like he is "not that into you." You seem to be available whenever he wants you? Maybe you need to have the discussion where you tell him that ignoring you for periods of time isn't acceptable.
thedreamer Posted July 1, 2006 Posted July 1, 2006 I did I left him a voice message a long one explaining how I felt and hoew I cant have someone in my life that would do that to me, the ignoring. Also how I would like it if he stopped and we could become could friends but if he cant I guess we just go our seperate ways. He never called back or text me, that was wednesday night and it's Saturday, does that mean he doesnt care or he just rather avoid confrontation, did I jump the gun should I just have ignored him back, I felt like if I did that he wouldnt know how much it bothered me???
pippen_2k Posted July 1, 2006 Posted July 1, 2006 Ive been on both ends of the stick, but once you get too emotional towards someone they are gonna back off big time. Im sure he does like you, but them deep and meaningful text messages you send him will only push him away. You want him to understand cause you are hurting, but when your in his shoes he wont understand what all the fuss is about. It seems like you could be his friend if you wished, but if you want more.. I dont like your chances.
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