bab Posted June 29, 2006 Posted June 29, 2006 So, last saturday I met this guy while we were both exercising our dogs. I'd say this guy is about 15 years my senior. He was ultra nice, and the dogs played together for a couple hours and we had casual conversation. It was all in the up and up, nothing sexual or inappropriate at all. It comes up in the conversation that he owns a popular restaurant in town. I hadn't been there in over a year, and he says I should come back. We both leave. Well, last night my mother, my husband, and our two friends went to the restaurant. It was extremely busy, and we had about a 30 minute wait. After about 25 minutes I go inside to check on it. I'm waiting in line, and I feel a tap on my shoulder, it's him. Not suprising at all since he owns the place. He asks how many I have with me and he trots off to find us a table. He comes back and takes us all to a table, chatting us all up the whole way. He seats us and leaves. He ends up sending out about $30 worth of appetizers to us. Our service is impecible, the manager (not the owner) came by to check on us frequently. As we finish up, the waiter tells us the meal is "on the dogs". For the 5 of us, plus the appetizers, this is close to $200 in food. Granted it didn't cost him that much, but still. I got so much s*** (good natured s***) about it. I of course contend that he was just a really nice guy and he was just being friendly. Not to mention he sealed all of us in as customers. Everyone else seemed to think that while yes, those things were part of it that there was more to it. We only saw him twice during the evening, I was there with my husband, and he didn't get my phone number or anything, so I don't agree. Does there always have to be ulterior motives?
KittenMoon Posted June 29, 2006 Posted June 29, 2006 IMO, people can do nice things for no reason at all. There's no reason yet to think this is anything else but that.
a4a Posted June 29, 2006 Posted June 29, 2006 I agree with KM.... Some people just enjoy being generous or offering what they have to others without one string attached.... a rare thing and more should practice it.
blind_otter Posted June 29, 2006 Posted June 29, 2006 I think that people who own businesses that are based on entertainment tend to do these sorts of things to increase custom. Maybe there was an ulterior motive, but it was most likely based more on increasing revenue than sex. In Belgium I went to a tiny restaurant owned by an Albanian man who spoke 5 languages, none of them english. He was the nicest restaraunteur I've ever met. He gave freebies as well and had a long conversation involving hand gestures and drawing pictures to get his point across, and I must say -- if I can find that card of his, I would recommend his restaurant to anyone visiting Namur just for that reason. It's like advertising.
Author bab Posted June 29, 2006 Author Posted June 29, 2006 Sweet. I'm glad that ya'll agree. Funny thing is, my friend went to the same place with the dog today, and he was there again. So, now she spent a couple hours chatting with him, and changed her tune. It's good to know that there are some generous people around. And you're right. My husband told some people that had never been there about it today at work, and highly recommend that they go there.
RecordProducer Posted June 29, 2006 Posted June 29, 2006 Everyone else seemed to think that while yes, those things were part of it that there was more to it. How about profit? If you visit his restaurant once a month from now on and recommend it to a few of your friends then they recommend it to THEIR friends, and so on - it's a lot of money for him. It's business, my dear. Not kindness or sexual motive. And he did a very smart thing from a marketing point of view. Alas, your husband stood in his way... When he was alone with you, he was just casual. But he invited you to go to his restaurant and you did. He felt that if he didn't take it on the house, he'd appear as if he begged you to come and make some profit for him. He sounds like a very nice and clever guy.
Mz. Pixie Posted June 29, 2006 Posted June 29, 2006 My H and I get this all the time. That's because he knows alot of people and has been a server in a five star joint for years. We've been lots of places and been served things for free. We even got a condo for a week, cheap cheap cheap because he knew the people. I wouldn't think anything of it.
longlegzs80 Posted June 30, 2006 Posted June 30, 2006 hmmm, interesting. How does your husband feel about this guy that you met? If I were you I'd explain to him your married, because maybe he don't know what your status is. I don't know. I find it kinda odd he would do that, but he must be interested in you. That is where you need to be clear and say hey I'm married, unless he just wants to be friends, which it seems like guys have a hard time with that.
alphamale Posted June 30, 2006 Posted June 30, 2006 Does there always have to be ulterior motives? pretty much, yes... did he invite you to his restaurant before or after he knew you were married? did you flirt with him and not say anything about hubbie?
longlegzs80 Posted June 30, 2006 Posted June 30, 2006 pretty much, yes... did he invite you to his restaurant before or after he knew you were married? did you flirt with him and not say anything about hubbie? I agree with your questioning.
Author bab Posted June 30, 2006 Author Posted June 30, 2006 pretty much, yes... did he invite you to his restaurant before or after he knew you were married? did you flirt with him and not say anything about hubbie? He knew I was married. By the end of our conversation he knew where my husband grew up, where we met, and what he did for a living. I'm not sure at exactly what point he invited me to the restaurant, but there was NEVER any mention of the meal being free. Just a, you should come check us out.
Author bab Posted June 30, 2006 Author Posted June 30, 2006 How does your husband feel about this guy that you met? He was like, "Yay, free food!" Jokingly: "You should talk to more boys!" He didn't believe that I'd done anything wrong at all. He's not the jealous type and he trusts me. Of course they were all picking on me, saying things like "I'm gonna have to keep an eye on you...", but it was genuienly in jest.
ThumbingMyWay Posted June 30, 2006 Posted June 30, 2006 I think he is just a personable kinda guy. I am nice to people to, just my nature. BUT I am also a guy, and when we see or talk to an attractive female....there is ALWAYS a flash of sexual thought that goes thru our mind...at least for me...
Craig Posted June 30, 2006 Posted June 30, 2006 No big deal, he's a nice guy that wants to increase his business. I think he genuinely likes people and that is shown by the 30 minute wait to get into his restaurant. If he had ulterior sexual motives I think rumors would circulate and his restaurant traffic would decrease.
arthur200 Posted June 30, 2006 Posted June 30, 2006 Ulterior motive, I think No, I honestly believe that there are some lovely people left in the world. Unfortunately there are 1000s more "less" lovely people out there and it's them that tarnish our opinion, and make us suspicious of truely generous gestures.
basscatcher Posted June 30, 2006 Posted June 30, 2006 I think he is just a personable kinda guy. I am nice to people to, just my nature. BUT I am also a guy, and when we see or talk to an attractive female....there is ALWAYS a flash of sexual thought that goes thru our mind...at least for me... Hey Thumb--Havent seen you around lately. Nice to see you poking in..
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