I'm sleeping w' MM -Sccessful,smart & 30 years oldder

[bunnyear]

be honest.

I never get used to man spending money on me.

I dont feel comfortable!

there is no free lunch in the world. If i dont like a guy. I dont even let him buy me drink. I m strange girl.

 

If we have sex relationship, then buy me dinner only but NOT jewellery.

 

my poor dignity.

[crazy_grl]

crazy girl.

u r wrong.

did u read my previous post?

 

we made this very clear. friendship dinner sex that is all.

 

I dont take or request a extra penny from him.

 

dont judge me even before u know what is really going on.

 

sometimes he tried to give me extra cash while refund my travel fare.

I dont take it.

I have my own money.

 

I think you misunderstood what I was saying. I know that you haven't taken money from him, but you said a free whore is worse than a whore. That implies to me that you would feel better about the situation is you had taken money from him instead of treating this situation like you two were equals.

 

I disagree with you that a free whore is worse than a whore, because if you had accepted money from him, you would still have been used, AND you would also lowered yourself to having sex for money.

[crazy_grl]

hope u get a clue.

 

Wow. That was completely uncalled for.

 

You misunderstood something I said and then started getting rude without even asking if that's what I meant.

[MarnieGirl]

can't help but wonder who really needs the clue here, bunnyear. just saying.

[bunnyear]

sory. i didnot mean to be rude.

 

i didnot read carefully.

 

so u mean afterall. didnot take money is correct.

right?

thanks

[crazy_grl]

sory. i didnot mean to be rude.

i didnot read carefully.

 

It's all right. You're forgiven.

 

so u mean afterall. didnot take money is correct.

right?

thanks

 

Yes, that's what I meant. It's better that you didn't ask him for money.

[bunnyear]

crazy girl.

sorry

 

i back and forth read ur words 3 times again.

 

I got it.

 

thanks.

 

i think i m bit hard on myself right now.

but u r right.

 

free whole is not worse than a whore.

what i did is right.

if i really had taken it. I will not just feel being used. also feel I m really LOW--which is worse

[bunnyear]

so why people call me

''free whore '' normally regarding of my post here.

 

 

i have taken nothing. Why i m a whore?

 

if u go out with a guy having dinner . he is poor student.

u like him from ur heart. and had sex later days.

is it a whore?

 

going out with a not-same-level(richer. oldder) guy will be a whore?

 

sorry. my brain is really mess now.

 

i just got one clue is that: maybe i m not really being used. it is just a munal agreetment. I steped in 1st place. i should know what will happen later. the wrong thing is i ''took it personal''

if now i have no emotional attachment to him.

I would be ok--happy.

 

sex+dinner+talk that is all.

 

the only thing he did wrong is dumped me 7 hours in airport.

which even friends will not do to each other.

So simplily. I m not happy with his behavior.

then i want to end it.

[MarnieGirl]

whore, slut, pig...they're all derogatory terms that are used to describe women who sleep with a lot of people, or women who sleep with the wrong people, such as a married man. it is also used to describe a women who slept with one person only.

 

sometimes it's also just used as name-calling for whatever reason.

 

it's thrown around pretty loosely, it doesn't really mean "paid sex-provider" to most people anymore.

 

 

if you're looking for a relationship with no emotional attachment so that you're not a whore (which i don't think makes sense) why don't you at least least try to have that with someone who isn't another woman's husband, or 1000 years older?

[bunnyear]

marnie girl.

 

hehe. u make me laugh. 1000 years old.

xx

 

1st. he said he is happily married. so i didnt feel guilty about sleep with him. as i m nothing to his wife really.

2nd. i had enough of young boys. So for experience and also i do bit little mature old guys.

[MarnieGirl]

marnie girl.

 

hehe. u make me laugh. 1000 years old.

xx

 

1st. he said he is happily married. so i didnt feel guilty about sleep with him. as i m nothing to his wife really.

2nd. i had enough of young boys. So for experience and also i do bit little mature old guys.

 

but regardless of how he and wife feel about each other, it didn't bother you to sleep with someone who is married to someone else. it should; you owe yourself more than that.

 

you are too young to be having this kind of experience, and this old man should know better. it sounds like maybe even you have a better head on your shoulders than he does, because you're less than half his age and you're already seeing why this situation isn't a good thing.

 

i don't like "boys" either, but there's got to be a happy medium between a boy and a grandfather. i don't even have a problem with age in relationships, usually, so long as the relationship is a sound one...but yous is not, and he's taking advantage of you.

 

don't you want a normal relationship with someone who doesn't have to divide his time? don't you want to be picked up at the airport in a timely fashion? don't you want a 50th wedding anniversary?

 

you won't get these things from this guy. i think you know that. it's just a matter of separation.

[midori]

hello everyone,

 

Too many, far far too many problems in this forum. I don't have time right now to weed through this thread, which is escalating in hostility, so I'm closing it.

 

Stop. Attacking. Each. Other.

 

Seriously. If you don't like someone's non-attacking advice, don't respond! Don't read it! Put them on your ignore list!

 

Everyone participating in this thread needs to read this memo:

http://www.loveshack.org/forums/t54546/

 

If you've voiced your opinion about someone's situation and they don't seem to feel that your advice is relevant or helpful, your best bet is to move on. Arguing your point in someone else's discussion thread, when they have indicated that they do not appreciate the perspective you're offering, is not going to do anything but create hostilities.

 

On the other hand, just because someone says something you don't like, doesn't mean that their post is inappropriate or attacking. Selective requests for feedback don't fly here: this is an open community.

 

Someone recently asserted that moderating in this forum is not always even handed. We simply don't have time to referee every post. You are all responsible for maintaining a level of civility in this forum. If we have to make emergency trips in here to shut down a problematic thread because of bickering, our first step is to close or delete the thread. If the problems continue we will have no choice but to review the membership status of the people in question.

[crazy_grl]

Yay. Now that it's unlocked I can post the response I tried to make earlier.

 

so why people call me

''free whore '' normally regarding of my post here.

 

i have taken nothing. Why i m a whore?

 

Well, I don't think I would have used the term if you hadn't used it. I think it may have a lot to do with the way this guy is treating you and talking to you. He's not being respectful. The thing about him dropping you at the airport for 7 hours and comparing the cost of your planet ticket with the cost of hookers is probably a major reason someone would say that.

 

if u go out with a guy having dinner . he is poor student.

u like him from ur heart. and had sex later days.

is it a whore?

 

going out with a not-same-level(richer. oldder) guy will be a whore?

 

You raise good questions. I think it has a lot to do with the level of respect a guy shows you, his intentions (whether he's just after sex or wants a relationship), your intentions, whether he's taken, whether you're taken, etc.

 

Some guys say that when they have sex with a girl who's not their girlfriend (when they're single) that buying her dinner is like paying for sex. I don't know if I agree with that, but it's the way some people feel.

 

I think what matters most is if you feel like you're being treated that way that you put a stop to it.

 

the wrong thing is i ''took it personal''

if now i have no emotional attachment to him.

I would be ok--happy.

 

sex+dinner+talk that is all.

 

It's not bad to get personally attached to someone you have sex with. That's natural. If this has shown you that you're not the type of person who can handle sex without feelings, then you know you should avoid those arrangements in the future. Or maybe if you've done this kind of thing before and it was just this guy who was the problem, then you know to avoid getting into these with men you may get feelings for.

 

the only thing he did wrong is dumped me 7 hours in airport.

which even friends will not do to each other.

So simplily. I m not happy with his behavior.

then i want to end it.

 

I think you have the right idea. This is one step in preventing a guy from treating you like a whore. You don't put up with him acting disrespectfully.

[MarnieGirl]

thank you, midori and LS.

 

oh, and bunnyear, i just want to make clear that my explanation of the word 'whore' is because you asked about it, not for any other reason.

 

just wanted to state that for the record, because sometimes other people read these things and either don't read well or just don't pay attention, and i don't need anyone thinking that you are being called a whore. not by me, anyway. i may not agree with what you're doing, or understand it, but i am not saying you were a whore.

[RealityCheck]

be honest.

I never get used to man spending money on me.

I dont feel comfortable!

there is no free lunch in the world. If i dont like a guy. I dont even let him buy me drink. I m strange girl.

 

If we have sex relationship, then buy me dinner only but NOT jewellery.

 

my poor dignity.

 

Don't have to justify your feeling. We understand.

 

As far as dignity, it is not "poor"! An Affair is a slow manipulation of emotion. That's ALL!

 

You have displayed a great sense of independance!!!

 

It is great that you have remained true to yourself in that respect!

 

Search deep, and you will reconnect with what you already know about yourself.

 

You are everything that "HE" has made you forget. A wonderful, sensitive, giving, caring, independent woman.

[Fun2BMe]

so why people call me

''free whore '' normally regarding of my post here.

 

 

i have taken nothing. Why i m a whore?

YOU are not a whore or a free whore. Let me make that clear. However, to HIM you are a free whore.

 

This is a player who takes you to a whore district, when he talks dirty to you he calls you a whore, when he pays your airfare he compares the amount paid to the amount of whores it would buy him. Whore whore whore. To HIM you are not only a whore but a FREE one and yes that is less respectful than even a whore.

[MarnieGirl]

 

This is a player who takes you to a whore district, when he talks dirty to you he calls you a whore, when he pays your airfare he compares the amount paid to the amount of whores it would buy him. Whore whore whore. To HIM you are not only a whore but a FREE one and yes that is less respectful than even a whore.

 

 

hey, wow, there really are a lot of whore connections to this guy. good call, fun2bme.

[bunnyear]

yes.

He does hookers.

esp while he is on business trip.

Hotel will find hookers for him.

[bunnyear]

and he told me

'' I did hookers before. It is not what i want.

I want something different.

respect + friendship + sex.

 

it is a new type of friendship that one shares good things of life. from food , fun to sex/lust. after sex, it is not finished. as long as we intrigue each other. there is a base for more.

[binevrywear]

So perhaps you should just accept that you are no longer "intriguing" to him any more. In other words, he's f***ed you once (or three times in one day) and has decided that's enough.Would you prefer that he keep calling you, inviting you to Europe, sleeping with you over and over? If yes, ask yourself why? Is it because you really love him? Or because you love the material things he can provide for you?Ask yourself this: If this man suddenly announced his business went tits up and that he was penniless, would you pay your way over there, pay for the hotel you two would stay at, pay the whole shot? Didn't think so.

[newbby]

well, i didnt read the whole entire thread (its long), but what i gathered was this.

he wants to keep you in your place and therefore he will over emphasize the sex talk, like dirty bitch etc, almost to convince you that this is what you want. in this way, he also tells you what you are to him (maybe not in a cold way, but just to keep you aware of what this is). he probably like most men who have affairs needs the ego boost for his performance too....these are just my thoughts, but i wouldnt analyse him so much as yourself here.

clearly, the sex makes you feel uncomfortable, and if so, dont do it. one way to know if he only wants you for the sex, is to not have sex. this is in no way a judgement on you, i dont think there are many women who have not at some time or another had sex when they werent truly confident in how the man felt about them. the fact is though, that having sex with him, makes you feel bad, and so it is a good idea, for you, if you stop.

he probably genuinely wants to be friends, but at the moment, because you are confused, it may not be a good idea for you to remain friends. just think about what you want to do, and do not beat yourself up if you might fail sometimes or take a step forward and two back. it just makes it alot easier if you are focussed on what you are all about rather than what he is all about.

[stillafool]

I just think also taking you to the red light district is dissrespectful unless you asked to see it. He was telling you what was on his mind then. He sounds like he sleeps with a lot of prostitutes. I hope he used protection with you. This guy is total sleazzzzzzzzz! His poor wife!

[Curt]

Due to the excessive moderation attention that this thread has needed, and the reports that have come in, it has been re-closed until further notice.