precious99 Posted June 27, 2006 Posted June 27, 2006 I have posted on this topic recently...but just earlier today my bf and I had a huge fight about the level and style of communication in our relationship. He is not a communicator on any level while I can talk from sun up to sun down. Lately (for the past few weeks) I have been trying a new approach - keeping my expressions of feelings to a minimum. This has been very difficult for me and my bf has said on numerous occassions that he likes it when i talk. My problem is this though - whenever i want to discuss some aspect of our relationship - i do all the talking and he responds with "I dont know what to say" or even just says nothing at all. I get that everyone is built differently and that this is his first significant relationship but what am i supposed to do? I mean i know that he loves me from how he acts but it would really be nice to hear that im amazing sometimes you know? So today we went out for lunch and as has become the norm i said almost nothing - well i could tell that he was feeling frusterated and so was I so when we got back to his house i just left and went home. Now i feel really stupid - any good ideas on what to do?
rkman Posted June 27, 2006 Posted June 27, 2006 Maybe he isn't much of a verbal communicator. Ask him to think about what you have to say for a while (a couple of days) and write down his thoughts on those issues. Guys don't always like to reply instantaneously, we like to think about things sometimes and get back to you later. The later sometimes just doesn't come up, or at least not in a positive way. Make sure he talks to you though, you don't wanna be stuck reading his thoughts for the rest of your life This may also help him to establish his own personal confidence in communicating verbally wiht you. If he disagrees with that, well, you'll just have to stick it to him where it hurts.
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