LauraK Posted June 27, 2006 Posted June 27, 2006 Hi all, Firstly I have to admit I feel a bit like a neurotic teenager writing here about this. I'm 26 though! I have been with this guy for a couple of months now (he's my friend's cousin). When we got together he was a security guard desperate for a new job. Currently he is in another part of Scotland doing training, and I see him at weekends. Problem is: I've been in this situation before. Ok to be fair not identical to this my other LDR was with an army guy. I hate the thought of yet again having a part time boyfriend. I am trying so hard to support him. But I don't think he understands the effect it will have on me or us. I fear I am going to be resentful over this. I can feel myself distancing myself from him already. I've gone in to self protection mode but its not what I want and its hurting me. We have spoke about it and have both said we want it to work. But I really don't see how it can. From the sounds of the oil rigs job, its pretty damn inflexible and of course with me working I just fear we aren't going to have much time together and drift apart. Silly things upset me (and yes I know how irrational this sounds!) like my sister invited us to her house for dinner on Saturday night for my sister's fiance's birthday. I asked him and he said "No I wont be able to make it - I'll be too tired." Fair enough right? Apart from the fact how do you know how you will feel in roughly a week's time? And that Saturday night is the night we get together. I told him that was fine, not a problem. So now he knows he's hardly going to see me this weekend. When that was mentioned (by me) I said oh well. He said what do you mean oh well? I said well what can I do about it?! He said well yeah suppose. Yeah ok I admit it - I wanted a reaction from him. (see what I mean about the neurotic teenager?!) This is just a short version (sorry I know its also a long short version!) of how I am feeling. Otherwise its great. He texts lots and phones me. But I can't see how I am going to chill out about him being away for weeks at a time? Any advice? Or do you think I should just finish with him before he goes on the rigs? Sorry if its a bit rambled. Laura x
tearful_soul22 Posted June 29, 2006 Posted June 29, 2006 neurotic or not you do have a point. seems to me it's gonna be hard on both of you mainly due to the distance issue. so the wise thing to do is for both of you to sit down and talk about your relationship and how committed you both are to making it work. don't just give up too quickly. you're lucky he phones and text you a lot..some just don't do that, which means he is serious about you and the relationship. give it some time...and try to be a wee bit more patient with him. love..afterall, takes time! take care, goodluck and i hope all works out well with the two of you!
Recommended Posts