Guest Posted June 26, 2006 Posted June 26, 2006 Hi, I have been in an LD relationship for 5 months now. We have a solid foundation, we have been dating for 5 years prior to the relationship being an LDR. Due to a family emergency he had to move away, we are in seperate continents altogether. Anyway, I just came back from seeing him a few weeks ago and it was really great! I am just concerned, while I love him very much, I wonder if he should not have made a commitment to us before moving? I know that he was not in a good financial stable position, and he still is not, but maybe up until a year ago, he was and could have proposed. Now, we are in an LD, and I am making plans to move to be with him. But are a little scared whether I am making a mistake. We have talked about it, but mostly beause of my nagging and constant asking where we are going. During our last conversation, after I was a wreck about our relationship, and was pretty much ready to walk, he told me that he sees us getting engaged and married, its just where he is that is the problem. Financially, I mean. Well, I have never been the type of woman to demand extravagant things. I dont even want a ring. Here is my question, based on the above, is it a bad idea to move?
Outcast Posted June 27, 2006 Posted June 27, 2006 Depends. Are you giving up a good job and a home and all your possessions or are you fairly free to move? If the latter, then moving, even if you don't end up with him, may be a great adventure for you and worth doing just for the heck of it.
Guest Posted June 27, 2006 Posted June 27, 2006 I am not giving up too much, I already have a job lined up on the other end, and it is actually in my future plans to move there, even if we are not together. I would just be moving sooner than I expected, and honestly before achieving a few things I want to. We lived together for about 4 months, right before he moved, to help save on expenses. Thats the only time we lived together, and it was really a temporary arrangement, I am not for the living together before marriage. Even if I do move to where he is, it would be to my own place, until if/when we got married. Whaddaya think?
confused423 Posted July 1, 2006 Posted July 1, 2006 o well if your living in your own place then go for it! at least that way if things dont work out your on your own anyway (in a sence), you just have to choose weather or not whatever it was you wanted to accomplish before you left is worth prolonging your move.
confusedgeek Posted July 1, 2006 Posted July 1, 2006 This seems somewhat related to my position. ill be watching this thread. Gathering the info on the original, post youve been dating for over 5 years. So you know each other pretty well. He moved due to a family emergency, which Im guessing something happened to his mom/dad/sister/brother. There is a problem there somewhere. Don't know much about the details. Then youre wondering about the relationship you have. Im not sure how to take this. Emergencies happen. Im assuming he asked you to be the girlfriend before the emergency. Then he had to move. Im sure he didnt expect for "the emergency" to happen while he was dating you. Personally, I wouldn't ask someone to be my girlfriend if something terrible happened to me. I would wait for the emergency finish out before I pursue someone. Even then, it would be the last thing on my mind. On the love scale, is this person worth for the move? And I think you've got your answer. - ConfusedGeek
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