fromfaraway Posted June 25, 2006 Posted June 25, 2006 Hello everyone , I have a question concerning an ex girlfriend. So I met this girl more than two years ago. I was 25 and she was 23. I was her boyfriend, her first lover, and her first every thing. She is very shy, and because of her childhood she developed a fear of commitment(she is the most faithful person I have ever seen. She is very shy as well). We fell for each other so deeply, and she wanted to see her parents in Chicago. After that she had a panic attack, and she broke it off. we tried to be friends, but it did not work out: it did not feel real. She was always very interested to talk to me and be around me. We did not speak for two years. A few months ago, she sent me a short email to say hi. I replied very quickly and was very excited. I suppose I freaked her out so she did not write again. I ran into her recently, and she seemed very happy to see me. She was with her family and I was with a friend. We chatted briefly, and my friend--without knowning who she was--told me that it was obvious that this girl liked me a lot. A couple of days later, I received a very friendly email from her. I waited for a few days and answered in a very friendly way as well--she always told me she thinks I am the best person she has ever known. What do you guys think about all of this? Do you think that she still has feelings for me or that she is just being friendly? As for me, I still care for her very much. Do you think it is a good idea to send her a friendly note from time to time, or just drop it? Thanks you very much for any feedback! Yours trully, Fromfaraway
Geoffrey Posted June 25, 2006 Posted June 25, 2006 ...and it sounds like you just might still be in the game...proceed slowly and with great care...you obviously made a good impression. Even the ones that don't ever work out still have their rainbows.
miranda beverly Posted June 26, 2006 Posted June 26, 2006 Aw. She sounds just extremely cautious. Perhaps her parents are coaching her into staying away out of fear of losing their daughter? Maybe it's not so much she is afraid of commitment, but afraid of being detatched from the family or something. Either way, it doesn't sound like anything bad happened between you two. I would keep in contact but in a careful subtle way. You both obviously still care for eachother. Good luck.
PeanutHead88 Posted June 26, 2006 Posted June 26, 2006 Well how did you guys break up? you can look at this through fates eyes if you want. You both seem like caring good people, not evil stupid ex's so It all sounds good, I'm happy for you I bet that is a exillerating feeling to talk to an old love, whom you still love :-)
Guest Posted June 26, 2006 Posted June 26, 2006 Well how did you guys break up? you can look at this through fates eyes if you want. You both seem like caring good people, not evil stupid ex's so It all sounds good, I'm happy for you I bet that is a exillerating feeling to talk to an old love, whom you still love :-) Thanks everyone for taking part in this! As for your question PeanutHead88, it was really a break up over nothing. Before the break up she paniced a lot. She told me that she really loved me and that she was afraid of commitement. She was crying when she said that and she said she is so afraid to loose me. I am completely convinced that this girl is very sincere. I have never had any resentment towards her, and deeply sympathised with her. Over the past two years, I read alot about committement phobia, and I entertained the idea of sending her the information unanimously, but then I realised I could hurt her feelings that way. The point is that now I realise that the fear is not about me; it stems from her past. Maybe she still does not know it. Deep down, I want to help her even if we never get back together. I just want to show her how deeply I loved her, and that I really want to help her. I know that noone can help her but herself, but I just feel that way. Is it strange that after two years and half she still seems so interested to find out about my life? Is it strange that my friend--who did not know who she was--could immediatelt see deep caring in her eyes when she was staring at me? We were together for three months. We never had an argument. I used to bring her flowers, and I can see that even her roommates seemed extremely happy for us. When we broke up, they felt so sad and the could not believe it. They always seemed happy to see me. When I held her in my arms, it seemed that both of us liked that feeling so much...
Author fromfaraway Posted June 26, 2006 Author Posted June 26, 2006 The post above by guest is actually by me. I do not know why it came out that way... Still looking forward to hear more of your great insights:)
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