Guest Posted June 23, 2006 Posted June 23, 2006 Is it always a roller coaster? Is it always up and down? Does anyone else have a hard time telling MM no? To stick with your plan of NC, but then when he calls or texts, you have to pick up the phone, even though the last week he made you feel unwanted as he couldn't be bothered to call before? I am a strong person, but I can't tell him no, I can't stay mad at him, I can't NOT talk to him. I do well at not contacting him, it is when he calls me that is an issue.
whichwayisup Posted June 23, 2006 Posted June 23, 2006 So, tell him to respect your wishes and NOT to call you, email you or try to see you ever again. Block him so you won't be tempted on text messaging and emails. Block him from your phone. Why can't you stay mad at him? What is it about him that sucks you back in?
livingwithit Posted June 23, 2006 Posted June 23, 2006 It's only been one week since I found out, but it's just like that. I am so weak to him. I wish I new the magic answer. If anyone has some advise on what to tell my heart I sure could use it.
Guest Posted June 23, 2006 Posted June 23, 2006 So, tell him to respect your wishes and NOT to call you, email you or try to see you ever again. Block him so you won't be tempted on text messaging and emails. Block him from your phone. Why can't you stay mad at him? What is it about him that sucks you back in? I have blocked his texts so that I won't get them, so I am not tempted. We don't email, but I can't block him from calling, because of circumstances he will always be in my life, not by my choice, just because of the circumstances, so this is someone that I will always see one way or another. I wish I knew why I can't stay mad at him. I wish I knew why I can't tell him no, I have NEVER been this way before, never. I wish I knew.
movinon05 Posted June 23, 2006 Posted June 23, 2006 For some reason, I never had a problem with NC, whether exMM started it or I started it. He was the one who always broke it. I don't know what to tell you other than what went through my mind. If I started NC, I was determined to move on with my life no matter what. Then he would show up out of nowhere and beg and plead and promise. He would never just call. He would show up. He could not take me moving on without him and he dogged me. He would convince me of anything and everything that he would make things right. I know this sounds strange because I did give in but he was also so damn convincing and he'd make a concrete plan or promise. So I'd give him the time limit he imposed on himself. When the time limit was up, he would start NC. I just felt that if he didn't want me or was willing to give up everything, then I was not going to bed and plead. Its just not in me to do that. I don't know why. When he would break his own NC, he would ask me why I didn't call him. And I told him exactly what I'm telling you. I was not going to beg and plead. Talk about a rollercoaster? Yes, you will be on the rollercoaster as long as you let yourself be on it.
Iwanttohope Posted June 23, 2006 Posted June 23, 2006 MO, what was your longest NC before this last one? For some reason, I never had a problem with NC, whether exMM started it or I started it. He was the one who always broke it. I don't know what to tell you other than what went through my mind. If I started NC, I was determined to move on with my life no matter what. Then he would show up out of nowhere and beg and plead and promise. He would never just call. He would show up. He could not take me moving on without him and he dogged me. He would convince me of anything and everything that he would make things right. I know this sounds strange because I did give in but he was also so damn convincing and he'd make a concrete plan or promise. So I'd give him the time limit he imposed on himself. When the time limit was up, he would start NC. I just felt that if he didn't want me or was willing to give up everything, then I was not going to bed and plead. Its just not in me to do that. I don't know why. When he would break his own NC, he would ask me why I didn't call him. And I told him exactly what I'm telling you. I was not going to beg and plead. Talk about a rollercoaster? Yes, you will be on the rollercoaster as long as you let yourself be on it.
Iwanttohope Posted June 23, 2006 Posted June 23, 2006 You know I'm asking because I'm on day 50 and wondered just how long a MM can stand it... So he actually made it 2-3 months or you did? 2 or 3 months over the course of 7 years.
movinon05 Posted June 23, 2006 Posted June 23, 2006 You know I'm asking because I'm on day 50 and wondered just how long a MM can stand it... So he actually made it 2-3 months or you did? He made it 2 months usually. I think only once it was 3. He always broke it.
RealityCheck Posted June 23, 2006 Posted June 23, 2006 He made it 2 months usually. I think only once it was 3. He always broke it. I don't believe my MM ever really made NC. When I was NC for 5 months he always emailed me. For me, those were easy to avoid. Then the shock of him showing up at my door 5 months after not seeing the whites of his eyes. Man! That was one dreadful day! If I live to be 100, I don't think I'll ever get that image out of my head! He looked horrible!
Sami_D Posted June 24, 2006 Posted June 24, 2006 Well no, I didn't have a hard time telling him 'no', but then he never pushed himself on me in any way. I don't think it's so much about whether a man is married or not here... I think it's more to do with how much you women know when to spot a LOSER... some of them are married and some of them aren't. But ffs... how any of you can bear the bad behaviour these men come up with ... and you all feel that's OK..???? WHY?
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