Guest Posted June 23, 2006 Posted June 23, 2006 I'm going to keep this short. So I dated this girl for a little bit on and off. About 2 1/2 weeks ago I took her to this really romantic place and we kicked if off with the hugging and touching etc. Alright called her the nxt day and no call backs or anythinig in 2 weeks ( btw this happened b4 and other times, she disappears and reappears ) We even had a talk about our relationship and decided it would be exclusive but taking it slowly. But she still does the vanishing act. So after the calls (above) 2x and 1txt msg --no responce I said f*ck it. I've been dating around already and tomorrow I have a new date with another girl I'm interested in. But the original girl calls me tonight 2x leaving me a msg to call her back. I didn't call her back because of her stupid childish actions. btw: tomorrow is her birthday Anyway to end this post should I even bother calling her back just because its her birthday or just forget her even as a friend. Because I can't stand this disappearing act and all of a sudden hits me up to chill or whatever.
Tony T Posted June 23, 2006 Posted June 23, 2006 Screw her birthday and write her off. Don't let her come back into your life ever again. Women who do this are out seeing other people, then when things don't work out or they have no money or plans they come back to you know who...(look in the mirror). She's simply playing you and enjoying it...and you're letting her. Don't let anybody, male or female, jerk you around like this. Let her know you'll only put up with her disappearing act ONE more time...now...when she disappears for good. She'll have so much respect for you when you tell her this she cream in her pants and want you forever...but, again, tell her NO!!! Don't you even dare call her for her birthday...why should you care if she has a happy birthday? She doesn't care about your butt!
maxima888 Posted June 23, 2006 Posted June 23, 2006 thanks man, thats excatly the advice I wanted to hear!!
Outcast Posted June 23, 2006 Posted June 23, 2006 Tony, you're making me dizzy. Didn't you just say the other day that people should pretend to be interested and then pretend to back off because 'driving people crazy' is somehow supposed to make them hot for you? Maybe the poor girl has read all the 'how to win someone over by playing games' threads, thinks that's supposed to work, and is trying it. How the heck's anybody supposed to know what to do? You're not supposed to let on you like someone. But if you play it cool, they think you're not interested and take off. Damned no matter what you do, I guess.
gfto Posted June 23, 2006 Posted June 23, 2006 exclusive but taking it slowly. Impossible. If she wants to take it slowly, then she has no desire to be exclusive with you. Forget her birthday. She isn't into you at all. Focus on the new girl(s).
BrandonBP Posted June 23, 2006 Posted June 23, 2006 Tony, you pegged it on the nose! What a stupid little trick whore! That's so selfish to treat someone this way! She's playing friggin' games and doesn't care about you. She's using you as something to do when she's bored. If she loved you, she'd want to be with you and talk to you all the time!
Outcast Posted June 23, 2006 Posted June 23, 2006 If she loved you, she'd want to be with you and talk to you all the time! Well, apparently that makes someone 'clingy' and undesirable. I tell ya, you can't win.
typical Posted June 23, 2006 Posted June 23, 2006 But the original girl calls me tonight 2x leaving me a msg to call her back. I didn't call her back because of her stupid childish actions. I am sorry, I just had to interject......see above points which are underlined, italicised and bolded......not for nothing, but arent you in essence, doing the exact same thing that she has been doing? So then, by your own definition,one could assume that your actions are also stupid and childish. Maybe the poor girl has read all the 'how to win someone over by playing games' threads, thinks that's supposed to work, and is trying it. Yes, I agree...it is quite possible that she has been sorting through the throngs of advice from every corner telling her to back off and not be too clingy and to act distant and aloof because "if you show a man interest, he wont be interested in you" What a stupid little trick whore! woowwwww.....someone is definately not working on healing old wounds. Upon further examination, I decided that this: If she loved you, she'd and this: So I dated this girl for a little bit on and off. Doesnt exactly jive........I'm not quite certain a few scattered dates equals to love, but I could be wrong. Don't you even dare call her for her birthday...why should you care if she has a happy birthday? She doesn't care about your butt! so, I assume that you asked her yourself, Tony T? btw: tomorrow is her birthday So, is there a way that you could possibly call her up to wish her a Happy Birthday and tell her that you are becoming quite confused by her actions? Because, according to your post, it doesnt seem like you even tried to inquire about her sketchy behaviour. Maybe she is a little confused or misguided and you could help clear up these emotions. But dont bother calling if you dont really like her that much and you are only going to end up screwing one of her Best Friends AFTER she has already fallen in love with you. Impossible. If she wants to take it slowly, then she has no desire to be exclusive with you. Wrong. She might want to take it slow because she has been hurt, is unsure about his (or her) feelings, doesnt want to push or be pushed. There are a myriad of reasons why women want to take it slow. Or, what do I know, she could be a selfish bitch in disguise who is really using you....I would just investigate a tiny bit further before throwing in the towel. People are so quick to throw other people away these days.
maxima888 Posted June 23, 2006 Posted June 23, 2006 I understand where your coming from typical but the reason I'm not calling her back is because don't you think its sorta just sorta messed up to only give me a call right before the event? Most of the time she calls I'm like always on call... out of the blue she calls me and be like 'come out do this..blah blah'... Mean while, I haven't spoken to her in weeks! I mean yea, I have a lot of time on my hands for now but that doesn't mean you should not pay attention to me and leave me hanging while I have feelings for you. Out of it all have a little respect for me and return my phone calls because I did try to contact you. So you claim your busy? Cool, call me back in a day or 2... thats fine but weeks? Give me a break...And only time you call me is oOo, come out lets go shopping or lets go party/bar hopping.... And one of the main reasons for me not calling is because I know I won't be having a good time at her birthday so I rather not reply back to her. I don't want to spoil her birthday by me just sitting there and not enjoying myself... Well, I'm going to go out since it is a friday night over here but put yourself in MY situation... When ever she calls I'm always going with her where ever she wants...I'd end up driving 1hr(oneway) just to see her and this is the thanks I get... but I think I just had it up to here with the disappearing act unless there is something I'm missing...
gfto Posted June 24, 2006 Posted June 24, 2006 Wrong. She might want to take it slow because she has been hurt, is unsure about his (or her) feelings, doesnt want to push or be pushed. or, she has extremely low interest level in him, as evidenced by the fact that she didn't contact him for two weeks!! There are a myriad of reasons why women want to take it slow. At the end of the day, it boils down to low interest level. Unless she recently had some kind of major traumatic life event, "take it slow" is a polite way of saying "I'm not that interested in you, and I never will be."
Outcast Posted June 24, 2006 Posted June 24, 2006 At the end of the day, it boils down to low interest level. Unless she recently had some kind of major traumatic life event, "take it slow" is a polite way of saying "I'm not that interested in you, and I never will be." Not in the least. It can mean 'I don't want to rush things and screw this up'. It can mean ' I'm scared to death because this could be IT'. It could mean a million things. But again, people assume the worst. There are eleventy-kazillion potential reasons for how people behave - but folks don't have sufficient imagination to figure them all out so they jump to the worst one. She could have IBS and not be able to go out except sometimes so she calls when she's well. She doesn't want to tell you she spends too much time having diarrhoea to just call you anytime. Or she could have an alcoholic family member she has to deal with. The possibilities are endless. But instead of ASKING her, just assume she's a bitch and dump her. It's no wonder people are alone.
maxima888 Posted June 24, 2006 Posted June 24, 2006 Well, I guess the tramatic event would be maybe because she just came out of a long term relationship... But 2 weeks?? In my opinion that is a very long time of NC...
Recommended Posts