Guest Posted June 22, 2006 Posted June 22, 2006 Hi all This has to be the most complicated situation imaginable. I'll try and keep to the point.Any advice??? I was married for 18 years. It wasn't a happy marriage. He was very controlling and mentally abusive. I was not allowed out without permission, to see friends without him basically do anything without checking with him first. I made the decision to leave him 18 months ago but didn't finally get the strength to do it until 6 months ago. I moved out of our house with our 2 children and have tried to get on with my life. He has done everything under the sun to try and get me back and prove he has changed. This sounds cold but I just have no feelings left for him. It took me so long to leave and I don't want to be the person i was when i was with him which is how i feel whenever i see him. Now to complicated things over the last 4 months ( remember the marriage was over in my head a long time)I have become involved with a mutual friend of ours and it is very serious. My ex also works for this man.We love each other, want to be together all the time. I don't feel this a rebound thing. Its certainly not about the sex - he has erectile problems so we dont. We have kept it secret but people are beginning to talk. My ex still thinks he can get me back. He is still going to friend for advice and to ask him to convince me to go back. We want to be together and can't keep putting it off. I feel as if ex is still running my life.Problem is how do we now tell him without destroying him completely. Anyone been here before. How did it go?? Yes not getting involved in the first place would have been good but in too deep for that now Thanks if you kept reading Lou
paige367 Posted June 23, 2006 Posted June 23, 2006 Your husband treated you terribly so why are you worried about destroying him. He's human and he'll get over it. You've gone through too much to tippytoe around this now. I would get it over with so you can start your new life. By the way, I do think you're rushing this new romance but hey that's not what this thread is about.
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