NightsInWhiteSatin Posted June 22, 2006 Posted June 22, 2006 You know when someone holds you tight and you're in that moment, kissing and cuddle.....deep down inside...can you tell how they feel about you regardless of what they say...you just know? I'm only asking because one of the things that secretly saddened me while i was with my ex was that deep down inside i could tell i never meant as much to him as he said i did...and it wasn't the fact i was last on the list of his priorities....it'd be when we were cuddling and kissing...i'd be there all smitten and the sparks and butterflies where there....but there was always something deep down inside that saddened me....something missing from him....i don't know whether it was the fact he'd cheated on me ages ago at the beginning of the relationship and it had left a permanent stain or scar on the specialness and sanctity of the relationship and it'd never be that true faithfulness to one an other...and i could never say we love eachother we've both been honest and faithful etc or what.
Diver012 Posted June 22, 2006 Posted June 22, 2006 I have a hard time believing that. Becasue... There have been moments between me and my ex when she expressed and felt like I was pushing her away. Work was crazy, was running an entire IT department by myself, I had just closed on my new house, getting insurance together, moving.. ect... I was going a million miles an hour. When she finially told me I explained to her that I never felt like I was pushing her away. I wanted to share the wonderful moments of owning a new home with her, I wanted her included in those victories. She explained that she thought i was not that into her and thought I was getting ready to dump her. I couldnt believe what I was hearing... I was so much in Love with this woman, I was telling her I was in Love with her. We were making love. But somewhere deep down she thought I was going to dump her? It just didnt make sense to me. I think she was reading into things WAY more than she should have. I believe that she was being overly sesitive about the relationship, and ultimately, thats what ruined it.
Pink Amulet Posted June 22, 2006 Posted June 22, 2006 She is refering to a feeling. She is not reading too much in to anything. I could have written this thread myself NWS. I don't think about it now though. The thought of loving someone so much and the feeling not being mutual is heart breaking.
Guest Posted June 22, 2006 Posted June 22, 2006 My BF used to say to me sometimes that he felt like I didn't love him as much as he loved me. It used to hurt me terribly. We just have different ways of expressing ourselves and over time, I've learned to show him that I love him in ways that are meaningful to him You might be write. Perhaps instinctively you feel that your BF doesn't feel that 'spark' for you. I've had that feeling sometimes with former boyfriends and I think I was usually right. But sometimes those feelings are mis-interpretations of someone's actions or body language. We expect our true love to always connect with us, to understand us and respond to us. Sometimes they fail to do this. Talk things over with him. Try to get it out in the open. It's best to know the truth and it may not be the awful truth you fear it is
Diver012 Posted June 22, 2006 Posted June 22, 2006 She is refering to a feeling. She is not reading too much in to anything. I could have written this thread myself NWS. I don't think about it now though. The thought of loving someone so much and the feeling not being mutual is heart breaking. This is true, all im saying is that sometimes, peoples feelings can be based on past experiences and fear. They are transfering their past experiences onto their current partner. Then... sometimes it is just as you say, a feeling... Ive had 3 scenarios where a feeling, really came out of know where.. its almost like, that spiritual connection you have with someone, is being severed. You can tell something is wrong, but you just dont know what... This is a tough subject for me to explain I guess as my mind is still all tangled up. I do know that when my last relationship ended, I knew something was suddenly wrong. I never dreamed it would be completely over, but the feeling something wrong was certainly there.
trillium Posted June 22, 2006 Posted June 22, 2006 The song "It's in his kiss" comes to mind. For me, that's always been true. I'm not talking about every time I kiss someone, but I do get a sense of how much feeling there is. It seems harder to hide things in a kiss than in words.
Diver012 Posted June 23, 2006 Posted June 23, 2006 To me its the look. My Ex used to look at me with the starriest eyes. I could feel her gaze. She was so into the romance. She even asked me to kiss her with my eyes open so she could stare into them while we were kissing. I never realized that she stopped staring into my eyes until after we split up. I think she was in love with the romance, not me. Once the romance wore off, she was bored with it and basically I was done. Maybe I was just blind.
trillium Posted June 23, 2006 Posted June 23, 2006 Yes, the look and the kiss so important. Part of my struggle is that was all in place last time I was with him. I've read in different places that the majority of human communication isn't in words but in body language and vocal tones.
Diver012 Posted June 23, 2006 Posted June 23, 2006 Bahh... im getting to that point where im getting tired of thinking about it. It gets old for me real quick. One thing that did come out of it... Emotions that were dormant for years, are now awakened. I dont think I can shut them off. I cant have those emotions with her anymore. She ruined it. But I will have them with someone else... more worthy than she... NWS, I feel like I hijacked your thread.. my apoligies... You are correct.... I was wrong. When 2 people are in the same place at teh same time, its just known between the 2 of them, without question. WHen someones holding something back, unless your blind like I was, you can tell.
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