dontbfooled Posted June 21, 2006 Posted June 21, 2006 All the great times, stolen kisses, passionate sex, lies to the W, deception... I guess as an OW the pain that we have all endured is something.... that we desearve. I hate to say it but I am starting to think that this horrible pain, this depression of being in an A, the sadness and guilt that lives inside of most of us... is this the punishment for aldultery? We knew it was wrong and did it anyway. We knew we would never want to be in her (W) shoes, but we did it anyway. We ran around with her hunsband, f***ed him every chance we got, fell in love, shares our souls... and now this is what we get for all of that s*** I guess. I knew there would be a downfall for doing something that I knew was SO WRONG. And now I realize that I am getting exactly what I desearve.
blind_otter Posted June 21, 2006 Posted June 21, 2006 Not really. You don't deserve to suffer. There is no reason for you to be in pain. And once you get out of a bad situation you see that.
grateful Posted June 21, 2006 Posted June 21, 2006 All the great times, stolen kisses, passionate sex, lies to the W, deception... I guess as an OW the pain that we have all endured is something.... that we desearve. I hate to say it but I am starting to think that this horrible pain, this depression of being in an A, the sadness and guilt that lives inside of most of us... is this the punishment for aldultery? We knew it was wrong and did it anyway. We knew we would never want to be in her (W) shoes, but we did it anyway. We ran around with her hunsband, f***ed him every chance we got, fell in love, shares our souls... and now this is what we get for all of that s*** I guess. I knew there would be a downfall for doing something that I knew was SO WRONG. And now I realize that I am getting exactly what I desearve. Wanna know what I think you deserve? You deserve better. You deserve to be #1 to the person that you love. You deserve to not have to feel pain and sadness and guilt over your relationship. I wish you the best and hope you can find the strength to go NC in order to take the first step to bringing about what you deserve.
scarletletter Posted June 21, 2006 Posted June 21, 2006 Don't be so hard on yourself. I understand and can relate to thinking that you are not worthy of being happy, but that is wrong. We have all made mistakes and are in over our heads, but it is a choice that we made. Now we just have to be responsible for the choice that we made and understand that it was not without it's problems. No one ever said it would be easy, no one ever said it to me, anyway. It is the most aggrivating thing in the world to not be with the one you love. I believe that everything happens for a reason and that some day I will be happy because it will be my turn.
Walking away Posted June 21, 2006 Posted June 21, 2006 He who is without sin can cast the first stone. We ALL make mistakes. ALL of us. Don't beat yourself up. Get out and feel better. It will only happen when you leave this relationship that both tears your heart up and riddles you with guilt. You deserve more and you deserve to feel better. Do what it takes to make that happen. Leave. Hugs WA
yesmaybe Posted June 21, 2006 Posted June 21, 2006 10% is the actual event. 90% is your attitude. If you frame it in accordance to guilt, karma, suffering, blah blah blah...well, you get out what you put in. Remember, a lot of things are not so black-and-white. Life, and espcially love, has a lot of nuances that makes it very hard for any of us to judge anyone else. Life is about moving foward - don't let anything hold you back.
target-d Posted June 21, 2006 Posted June 21, 2006 Don't be so hard on yourself. You deserve happiness, just like everyone else. Everyone makes mistakes. The trick is to pick yourself up, dust yourself off and take care not to make the same mistake over and over again. Just remember, you deserve happiness, and as someone else here said, you deserve to be #1 to some lucky guy. Take care, and stop beating yourself up.
RealityCheck Posted June 21, 2006 Posted June 21, 2006 10% is the actual event. 90% is your attitude. If you frame it in accordance to guilt, karma, suffering, blah blah blah...well, you get out what you put in. Remember, a lot of things are not so black-and-white. Life, and espcially love, has a lot of nuances that makes it very hard for any of us to judge anyone else. Life is about moving foward - don't let anything hold you back. Well said!! My sentiments exactly!
Author dontbfooled Posted June 21, 2006 Author Posted June 21, 2006 You guys are amazing and SO RIGHT. Thank you for your support. I luv ya!!!!
whichwayisup Posted June 21, 2006 Posted June 21, 2006 Learn from it and don't do it again. A painful lesson, but it's something you won't do again. If you're still in this affair, get out. You have alot more control than you think. And you do deserve better, even if your heart wants this man...And he wants you...He still isn't worth it because he broke his vows to his wife and kids if he has any. If you stay, this is how your life will be for a very long time.
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