Lost1616 Posted June 21, 2006 Posted June 21, 2006 Hey... to try and cut a long story short, dated my ex for 14 months. Things got a little hard and because this was both of our 1st serious relationship we or... more so...she thought that because it wasnt 100% perfect its best to end it and remain friends as hurt as we both will be. So 1 week later to my complete and utter shock she starts a relationship with one of my oldest friends and hurts me in a way that i wouldnt wish upon my worst enemy! Basically this guy did manipulate his way in and even though shes not blameless i can see that it was mostly his actions that lead to the outcome. Its been nearly 3 weeks or so since it all happened and unfortunately i cant go no contact because i work with her 4 days a week. We have been ignoring eachother and she definitly is feeling guilty coming into work and seeing me. The other day i couldnt take the tension anymore and pulled her aside asking if we could talk it through because i need closure. Im also trying to be the bigger person clearing things up so at least we could be on speaking terms at work. Im still in the dark and cant move forward until its all finalised. I talked to her for 1 minute and i could see she was very upset holding back tears and obviously been dealing with alot of inner demons (as she should). This ex mate of mine that has manipulated and lied his way to get her is a nasty person. There are many things about his past and present that she has no clue about. I still care about her deeply and as much as everone keeps saying let her find out the hard way i really want to at least try and tell her what hes really like. My question is... Do u think she will listen to me (her loving ex bf of 14months who has always been there for her to give her advice and selflessly help her through tough times) or this guy who shes been with for 2 weeks? who she doesnt know but if she wasnt as naive and stopped to think about things she would see by his actions that hes a nasty piece of work. Eg if he could do this to his oldest friend without caring how do u think shes going to be treated in the long run? If anyone could give me some useful advice, maybe some girls perspective on this? Would be forever grateful. Thanks.
bab Posted June 21, 2006 Posted June 21, 2006 I'm sorry that you are going through this. I do not recommend telling your ex-gf about how nasty the new guy is. No matter how good your intentions, she is going to see you as trying to break them up. If you are truely concerned tell one of her friends, and if they feel like it's important, they will let her know.
fabulousgal Posted June 21, 2006 Posted June 21, 2006 Walk away from her. She is not respecting you by dating your friend, and dating so quickly. Let her find out the hard way, bc if you say anything she will percive at as jealousy.
Author Lost1616 Posted June 21, 2006 Author Posted June 21, 2006 I know... thats what im worried about too. The thing is she has no reason to not trust me and ile make it definitly be sincere and make it clear that im not telling her out of jealousy or wanting her back (because i dont). Its out of total concern because i still care about what happens to her. Shes a nice girl and deserves better. I dont have any of her friends numbers so theres noone else that can pass on this info to tell her. Thanks for your post
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