CryingShame Posted June 20, 2006 Posted June 20, 2006 Hi All, I've been dating my boyfriend for 8 months now. We are in love and I find that when he comes to stay at my house and the time comes for him to go home, this hits me really hard and I end up crying. I don't usually do this in front of him, but as soon as the door shuts behind him. ( I don't want to appear like a total freak!). Sometimes when he's at my place and he says he needs to go home, I say 'Okay then' but can't help saying this in a sad tone. He says when I use that tone it makes him feel guilty. But should I be hiding my feelings and putting on a happy voice when I'm sad. Shouldn't ones' true feelings be let out. I know this sounds simple but any advice appreciated. I don't like making him feel guilty.
fetish Posted June 21, 2006 Posted June 21, 2006 don't get too dependent on his presence to make you happy. A very common mistake that alot of women make. I know this because my girlfriend wants me to spend all our time together. I get tired of her and i think she does too because she'll start her moodswings over little stuff. But she never admits she's tired of me. I guess that's her way of trying to make me feel guilty about wanting my space. But men need their room. I don't know why, we just do. The worst thing you could do is start acting desperate because that will push him away. I find that i most desire my woman when she acts like she doesn't need me as much. Give it a try, from a man's point of view.
lovestruck234 Posted June 21, 2006 Posted June 21, 2006 Hey, I can understand COMPLETELY how you feel, I kinda do the same with my boyfriend. I feel as though I'm in the same situation as you... I get really upset when he leaves and almost cry, but most of the time I don't cos I know I'm going to see him again tomorrow (we see each other everyday and we're not living together...obsessed or what?? lol) I know for a fact that fetish is right, guys get heaps more attracted to a girl when she gives the impression that she's just as independent on her own rather than needing him every second of the day. I have just got a job that requires travelling about an hour on thr train from home everyday, whereas my bf only needs to travel 5 mins from home. (we live just up the road from eachother) When I first got this job, it drove us both crazy cos we knew we were so far away from eachother, but then gradually we came to terms with it, hey, that's life, right? We would txt eachother everyday 10 times a day atleast and would pounce on eachother when we got home. But then when we realised that it was just life, we became less dependent and stopped msging eachother all the time (the amount of money I save on my phone bill is astonishing!!) But what I'm saying is it wasn't too long ago my bf said to me that he was even more anxious to see me after work when he didn't hear from me all day cos it got him thinking about me and wondering what I was doing, etc, etc... and I was the same, althought it doesn't seem like it at first, and it all sucks when you have to part eachother, it gets better and cos we are hanging to see eachother by the end of the day, it's alot more rewarding!! I still hate it now and so does he when we he or I have to leave, but we just go to work and do what we gotta do, then jump into eachother's arms at the end of the day!! I hope this helps! All the best, and if all else fails, talk to him about it and tel him EXACTLY how you feel, and if it's all the truth, and you tell him what you just told us, you won't come across as a freak...he'll probably repsect you more knowing that you really do love him and wanna be with him. Just be calm about it and talk about it rationally, and see what the result is...
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