Guest Posted June 16, 2006 Posted June 16, 2006 i have been married for 19 years and the magic is gone, the attention of my husband and just feeling special from him is evaporated to absolete. now there is this older guy that has been calling me and paying attention to me, like i love. i have always been attracted to older, wiser guys my whole adult life. this new guy is what i want, but i am hesitant as if he is what i need.
sickinside Posted June 16, 2006 Posted June 16, 2006 Do you want pursue this while you are still in your marriage?
plainoldjared Posted June 16, 2006 Posted June 16, 2006 thought I would offer some advice. have you talked to your husband? i have a prejudice towards older men at the moment (my post on my gf having a sugar daddy) and where im coming from is he may be doing all these things for you now but is he married? if he is then hes got more issues and some nerve disrespecting his wife like this and youve not opened up your eyes this fact and he is obviously avoiding these issues by distracting himself with you... if hes not married does he know you are? if so, then i dislike him even more because coming from a guys or any decent persons perspective theres nothing lower than romancing anothers partner. hes obviously not respecting you or your problems. instead of confusing you by acting like what he knows you want/miss (im sure youve voiced these desires) he should be helping you sort your feelings... whats up with your husband? has it always been like this or did something happen that changed things?
whichwayisup Posted June 17, 2006 Posted June 17, 2006 i have been married for 19 years and the magic is gone, the attention of my husband and just feeling special from him is evaporated to absolete. now there is this older guy that has been calling me and paying attention to me, like i love. i have always been attracted to older, wiser guys my whole adult life. this new guy is what i want, but i am hesitant as if he is what i need. NO. Do not pursue it. Have you tried to get that magic back? Have you talked to your husband and let him know how you're feeling? You can't just go chase another man because the "intense lovey-crush" feeling isn't there anymore. What is your marriage based on? What needs are not being met by your husband. Start from there. So, this other older man is paying you attention...Let me tell ya, that's NOT love. It's lust and needing to feel the need of attention. You CAN get that from your husband...Just talk to him about it all. Give him a chance. Don't go and cheat on him. That's wrong, it's stupid and selfish. Live up to your vows! BUT. If you feel the marriage isn't working, get a divorce NOW before you cheat on your husband. Go read some threads in the OW/OM section...See what you're in for. Also, read some threads in this section about BS (Betrayed Spouses) and see how painful it is for them to deal with the affair when they find out.
AMBERINVEGAS Posted June 17, 2006 Posted June 17, 2006 The magic may have gone since you met the new guy. If your marrige is bad and you have tried counseling? they divorce before you see anyone..leave your options open. Don't just go for this guy who is giving you his attention for the moment.
AMBERINVEGAS Posted June 17, 2006 Posted June 17, 2006 The magic may have gone since you met the new guy. If your marrige is bad and you have tried counseling? they divorce before you see anyone..leave your options open. Don't just go for this guy who is giving you his attention for the moment. You really need to think this through before you jump. The grass isn't always greener. But that doesn't mean you have to stay married to your husband.
johnlucas Posted June 18, 2006 Posted June 18, 2006 i have been married for 19 years and the magic is gone, the attention of my husband and just feeling special from him is evaporated to absolete. now there is this older guy that has been calling me and paying attention to me, like i love. i have always been attracted to older, wiser guys my whole adult life. this new guy is what i want, but i am hesitant as if he is what i need. Divorce husband & pursue older guy. Very easy. John Lucas
Sal Paradise Posted June 18, 2006 Posted June 18, 2006 Why not work on marriage or divorce your husband? Oh yeah that would require work and its much easier to just have your cake and eat it too.
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