sunnie23 Posted June 15, 2006 Posted June 15, 2006 I think there's something wrong with me. Been dating my bf for 6 months, sometimes it seems serious sometimes it doesn't, I never really know and I never have the balls to talk to him about it because I'm always afraid I'm being over emotional. Last weekend we got in a fight because he did some things that really hurt me (I've posted about them twice - thank god for the shack). He was really awesome in how he made it up to me and I could see that he genuinely felt bad. Yesterday while I'm here at work I write up this email because I want him to know that I've appreciated what he did. Except I overdid it. Yes, the L word was involved. As soon as I sent it I hit myself in the head....WHY would I do that? It was completely over the top, completely irrational, completely unfair to throw that out in an email. So I went home and forgot about it - until I got the reply this morning: "hey i just got ur email today things were kinda hectic around here yesterday, anyways i wish i could say those words back but i think they get thrown around alot and i just wanna make sure i mean um before i say em but i really do like u alot so dont take it the wrong way please talk 2 u later xoxo" AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH What have I done? Is it possible to recover from it? i can't BELIEVE that i did it, even if he would have said it back i'd still feel like a moron for emailing it to him. Right now I want to crawl under a rock, or run away, but the last thing i want to do is talk to him or see him, I am sooooooo embarrassed!!!
Sapiens Posted June 15, 2006 Posted June 15, 2006 I am sooooooo embarrassed!!! Don't be! Post the email so we can analyse it.
destination_unknown Posted June 15, 2006 Posted June 15, 2006 I dont think there is anything wrong with telling someone the depth of your feeling for them, the only time you should hold back from that is when you think you will be upset & feel rejected if they dont reciprocate they way you want them to. The drinking thing makes it a little more complicated, so he has been sweet and affectionate and apologetic, but has he said he will change the way he drinks and are you BOTH willing to change the way that you socialise? Its a little hard to give up the "get wasted with your friends on saturday night" but maybe try taking it easy for a while. Do other things on saturdays for a couple of months. Thats what I've been doing and I'm really enjoying it, I have found loads of things I'm interested and enjoy doing that I didnt think I would. I have two glasses of wine or two/three beers very occasionally and not in a "party" setting. Don't stress over saying you love him, if thats honestly how you feel. What is stressing you out about saying this are your own fears. So, you put your cards on the table, isnt that a little liberating? He can now either deal with that immaturely and make a big deal out of it or he can stay going with the flow and see how his feelings develop. Don't worry, you are being honest and he can take it or leave it. There is little point in hiding how you feel. Yeah, it stings a bit not having it said straight back, but he has said that he really likes you. Try not to get hung up on him not saying it, and just enjoy the relationship.
whichwayisup Posted June 15, 2006 Posted June 15, 2006 "hey i just got ur email today things were kinda hectic around here yesterday, anyways i wish i could say those words back but i think they get thrown around alot and i just wanna make sure i mean um before i say em but i really do like u alot so dont take it the wrong way please talk 2 u later xoxo" That's a positive email. I wouldn't be embarressed. You spoke from the heart and that's always a good thing. It's honest! Try not to get hung up on whether or not you're too emotional. You are who you are and if he didn't like you, he wouldn't be with you. Be strong and BE who you are!
Cecelius Posted June 15, 2006 Posted June 15, 2006 This was a positive response. He couldn't have said "I love you" back because it would have seemed weak and forced.
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