If you are/were a Betrayed Spouse, did you discover it or did your partner confess?

[ccbear30]

So watching some postings of late, it seemed like some people thought it was better for the BS (betrayed spouse) if their WS (wayward spouse) confessed rather than being caught. If you are/were a BS what happened? What do you think?

 

When I was the WS, I was caught. Fast forward a number of years, as the BS I did not "catch" he confessed. Sometimes I've been so glad he confessed, other times I wish I would have caught him.

I am going through this now, while I am 13 weeks pregnant-My husband came out and told me right away. In ways that is a good thing but at the same time I still have the awful WHY in my head-we are seeking counseling and it is a slow process but we will see where it leads-Have you seeked any help with this?

[Piratesmate]

hello all

this is my first posting on here

i found this site by doing a Google search for

"what to do is your husband is cheating online". LOL

so I decided to join.

 

I am on my second marriage and haven't been married two years yet.

I have proof from my husbands emails to at least three women that he was wanting to see some of the women he communicates via email with.

One of the emails this weekend he sent to one of the women, he asked her if they could meet for lunch on one of his days off. I printed it out.

I sent her an annoynomous email and informed her that he was married and she wrote back and said she had no idea and apologized. She said my husband never told her he was married.

I have been reading some of the emails he has been receiving and sending out (that is, before he deletes them) and most seemed harmless but this one woman he seemed to finally get the nerve up to ask her out.

I know three of the women he sends emails back and forth to are former girlfriends.

I haven't spoken to him in a couple of days and I am extremely depressed.

my first husband of 17 years cheated on me with my best friend and got her pregnant.

Sad that what has happened to me is so rampant all around me now.

It is scary and it is awful at the same time.

 

I want to say how sorry I am to all the women/men who have gone through a spouse cheating on them. Life shouldn't be this miserable.

[Piratesmate]

btw,

my spouse refuses to admit he has cheated on me. I have asked him before but now I have proof he is either bored with me or he has an addiction problem.

 

I wish he would talk to me and admit he was wrong.

 

I have also asked him to stop his online porn viewing and he states he will. he also lied about that too even though i caught him viewing porn sites. He stated to me that someone sent him a site and he didnt know what the site was.....he lied...I came up behind him while he was scrolling through the porno site and caught him....even then he denied what he was doing...