Guest Posted June 9, 2006 Posted June 9, 2006 So I went to see the Arctic Monkeys tonight with this gorgeous, 18 yo chick (will be 19 soon). Now we’ve had the talk about being more than friends last week, and she said she cared about me in a “friendly way.” Apparently, the main problem is that this guy (who was in our poetry class) apparently charmed her before school was over, and now he’s in Portland…and isn’t coming back to ASU again…but wants her to fly down and visit him (she wants to, but I highly doubt her parents would allow that). However, she still really wanted to go to this concert with me (in fact, she was the one who brought up the idea of seeing the concert together when I mentioned they were coming to town in March), friends and others I’ve talked to say that she’s shown signs that she is interested in me, is still doing things that show she still has feelings for me, and that it might just be a case of bad timing due to the Portland guy, so she still may be interested and I shouldn’t give up just yet. Anyway, she looked gorgeous (had on a beautiful black top on that would make J. Lo blush), we laughed a lot, and the conversation was flowing. On top of that, despite mentioning that she likes to have space and felt uncomfortable at concerts, she rubbed up against me a couple of times, and when her friends went further into the crowd, she chose to stay by me. So why do my friends think this? Well, here are some reasons, and you can decide for yourself: -When she found out she was going to see a Beatles tribute band concert, IM'd me two hours beforehand and told me she wanted me to go with her. First off, I had to work that night, but she told me "oh, you work for your parents. you can get the night off." Also, I live in Scottsdale, and had to drive all the way to Gilbert where she lives (which is a good 35 - 40 minute drive) to see it, and she knew I lived that far. And on top of that, who was she going with? Her parents. That's right, it was just me and her family. But this was in March, two months before Portland guy entered the picture. -I introduced her to the Arctic Monkeys, and when I mentioned they were coming to town, she told me "if I end up liking this album, maybe we could go to the concert together." -She’s always IMing me…whether it’s as soon as I get on, as soon as she goes on, or no matter who’s using the Internet. She’s even IM’d me when I left my away message on (saying something like “I know you’re not really away, so I’m just going to bug you. Bug bug bug.”) -She’s always checking my Myspace profile, almost daily, and has commented on my pics minutes after I post them. Not only that, be she commented on the same set of pics I posted days later. -One time we were chatting, and we had a conversation that went like this: Her: i love pandas Her: they're so adorable Her: they make me smile everytime Me: is that the only thing that makes you smile everytime you see it. Her: nope Me: not even a picture of like Brandon Boyd? Her: haha it's NOT the only thing that makes me smile Her: pictures of [CERTAIN CUTE GUYS] make me smile. Her: cute guys in general Apparently girls I talked to said they wouldn’t talk like this unless they liked someone, otherwise they would have re-worded it. Girls I talk to also think she’s definitely flirting with me, saying things like this: Me: I was trying to fool you, but I guess it didn't work. Her: you're just not as smart as other people...it's OK Me: :-\ Her: :-D juuust kidding Her: you're a f***in' genius! -When I first heard about the guy from Portland, I began writing a bunch of songs as a way to vent my frustrations, eventually writing about an album’s worth of material in one night. I was proud enough to post a few of the songs, and she hadn’t IM’d me in a couple days, despite me being on. The day I posted a couple of them (which had references to her), she started IMing me regularly again. This could be a coincidence though. -When we first started talking, she was dating somebody, so I accepted that and didn’t pursue anything. But around March or April (which is also when she wanted me to see those two concerts), she no longer mentioned anything about him, and later even started calling him a “douche,” “idiot,” and claimed he was on a “power trip” after he wouldn’t listen to her advice about editing, even though she has newspaper experience. She also insisted that he hire me as the music expert of his magazine, a job which I got. -I’m also her shoulder to cry on, even telling me once that “next to my parents you're the only person i've told that I feel like this.” -After the “I care about you in a friendly way” convo, she’s been IMing me more than ever, even saying “I‘m always the one Iming you. What‘s up with that?” In fact, a couple of days later, she called me a “Dweebasaurus,” and then once I logged back online 5 minutes later (my Internet connection was disconnected right after she said that), she sent me this pic, which she drew while I was gone: http://myspace-212.vo.llnwd.net/00801/21/22/801142212_l.jpg This is apparently me, as a Dweebasaurus. I mean, if you see someone as just a “friend,” do you really take the time to do something like that? Anyway, there’s the reasons why people I know think she’s interested in me. Now it would absolutely be idiotic and stupid of me to put all my eggs in one basket and refuse to date or hang out with other girls because of her; in fact, I’ve been on a couple of dates already. But, as long as I’m single, my friends think I could definitely win her over and get her back to when her interest in me peaked at around March/April, that is if I “play my cards right." But the thing is, I really have no ammo; charming and impressing girls, trying to win hem over, playing hard-to-get and hardball, making a girl jealous…that’s one of my weaknesses. And this will probably be harder than just sneaking a kiss, especially after having the “I care about you in a friendly way” convo. I mean she’s young (18, likes a guy who's now in Portland (she started mentining him and the fact that he started liking him around May...before that, she made no mention of any other guys), wants to save money and doesn’t like other people paying for her or wasting gas on her, which may make hanging out difficult (it has before when I asked her to do things), and I just read a comment somewhere where she said “I’m at a point in my life where I'm not really concerned with having a boyfriend... if one comes along, they come along,” so she may just want to have fun or test the waters. But I’m sure there are people here who have, or have known people who have won over girls or people who were once friends, so I’m just looking for some tips, advice or tricks I can use. My question is, since people think she still has an interest in me, do you think I should try to charm or win over this girl, and if so, do you have any suggestions or ideas as to how I can impress her, win her over, or games or methods I can use to get her to notice me? I've always believed that, in the case of someone wanting to test the waters, you can win them over if ya impress them enough or if you play your cards right...2 things I really don't know how to do well, and was hoping to get advice as to what I could do and such.
TheSwordfish Posted June 9, 2006 Posted June 9, 2006 Instead of smiling when she makes fun of you, make fun of her. For example, she says you're just not as smart as other people. You could reply: "You're right, you shoudl definately give me the adress of the mental institution you're in, so I can come and join the party" (Well not the best thing, but at leats you make fun of her). I like giving girls the number of a great psychiatrist when they say stupid stuff. Now, without giving weird advice. I would saym, you could have a chance. girls say teh friends thing for different reasons: A.They think you're uggly B.They think you're cute but they dont like your character (after certain incidents you might get in the friendszone) C.When they aren't completely sure what they think, and don't want things to go to fast. D.When they are insecure and not sure if they can handle you. Not sure what she wants from you. you need to figure that out by yourself. Is she flirting a lot? Does she talk about other guys when she's with you? (Thats a bad sign)
WesternRiver Posted June 9, 2006 Posted June 9, 2006 Does she flirt with me? Ya, I think so. And does she talk about other guys? Not when we're in person, though she has online.
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