fitnessgal Posted June 6, 2006 Posted June 6, 2006 Hello everyone im new to this board Anyways to my situation. I met a really tall handsome man who works out, has a career, and pretty much has his life in order. For some reason i don't trust good looking men and i don't want to get my feelings hurt like in the past. He is way better off than me and i know he can do better so i dont understand why he did pursue me, then all of a sudden quit I gave him my cell number and he called a couple days later after we first met. We went out on a great date and somehow ended up at his place and it was 3am so i slept with him in his bed. Now we did not have any type of sex at all or did he even try too initiate sex with me. We did cuddle and kiss a little but that was all. He does'nt call everyday but every 2-3 days and i answer his call everytime he calls me. I have yet to miss a call from him. 3 nights after we first went out, he came to my place and his hotness just turns me on and we had awesome sex for an hour. He was'nt selfish and he made sure he got me off. He ended up sleeping over and leaving the next morning. Again he calls every 2-3 days or so. We went out again going hiking and to the lake on waverunners basically just a fun date. I have not heard from him since. It's been a week. Now i feel he just gave up on me. I dont know if it's the fact that i dont call him at all. Im just not use to calling a guy and i dont want to feel that im smothering him so that's why i have not called him and i just dont trust good looking men. I have not heard from him at all and i dont know what to do. Usually he'll follow up and see how im doing by cell, text, or even email. Now it's like he just fell off the edge of the earth. He was giving me attention and has all of a sudden stopped. I dont think he just wanted me for sex because we have'nt had sex everytime we seen eachother and there were times he'd sleep over with no sex. Im not use to this and i need some guidance. Thanks
Vertex Posted June 6, 2006 Posted June 6, 2006 I think a follow-up call wouldn't be too smothering or a bad idea.
Sapiens Posted June 6, 2006 Posted June 6, 2006 For some reason i don't trust good looking men and i don't want to get my feelings hurt like in the past. He is way better off than me and i know he can do better so i dont understand why he did pursue me, then all of a sudden quit So in other words, you are insecure and feel you don't really deserve him, which in turn will fuel your jealousy and insecurity. He does'nt call everyday but every 2-3 days and i answer his call everytime he calls me. Nothing wrong with this, most of us don't feel the need to call all the time. (Deep down I think this has to do with the way our ancestor left to hunt for long days at a time...) Anyways, yes, we don't feel the need to call you 24/7. Now i feel he just gave up on me. I dont know if it's the fact that i dont call him at all. Im just not use to calling a guy and i dont want to feel that im smothering him so that's why i have not called him This is the part that kicks my ass about women, they either call too much or none at all. My Ex felt the need to call my 10+ times a day, even though I am freaking working, and if I didn't answer or I either cut the call short she would freak out and pout. Look, one call is good, two calls tops, but anything more than that just to tell me you found the most awesome shoes sucks!! We don't care about the 1,000,000 shades of maube and what not. Ugh! He was giving me attention and has all of a sudden stopped. Pick up the damn phone and say hi! That's all. Man, you are now helping me understand how we play all this stupid mind games. -Sapiens
Carlthecoffeeaddict Posted June 6, 2006 Posted June 6, 2006 on the flipside, he may be wondering how frequently to CALL YOU! look........guys are just as clueless as well......we don't want to rub off the wrong way.
brightskies Posted June 7, 2006 Posted June 7, 2006 My sense is, maybe he lost interest because you were too easy and available to him. You answered his call every time. You slept over (even without sex) on the first date. You had sex before you really got to know each other. Even without the sex, you were easily available to him for cuddling and intimacy --- even though he didn't have to make much of an effort to know you as a person first. More often than not, Easy=not special/good for fun and not much more (in the back of his mind). And that first night of hands off? Very clever man --- made you think he was somehow more honorable, not interested in just sex? Didn't take him long (just 3 days after the first date) to try his luck. And he hit the jackpot soon enough. When something's handed to you on a platter, sometimes you don't appreciate it as much as when you've worked for it. Just a thought.
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