mikev Posted May 26, 2006 Posted May 26, 2006 My friend has this massive crush on this guy, she's fancied him since the age of 15 (shes now 18) and she lost her virginity to this guy aswell. They are not going out with each other now and they barely talk, but she just cant let go of him she is always talking about him and she hasnt had a boyfriend since she lost her virginity. I keep telling her to call him but she's afraid of rejection, and she said if i ever asked him to go out with her she would never forgive me. what would she do? And what can i do? Thanks
LucreziaBorgia Posted May 26, 2006 Posted May 26, 2006 All you can do is play the part of emotional tampon and simply listen. And listen. And listen. And listen. It wouldn't really be your place to talk to this guy, particularly if she has made it clear that she doesn't want you to. Or... If it is something that you are no longer comfortable talking about, gently let her know that you are her friend and will be there for her but that you cannot handle this particular conversation topic any further. You can try to encourage her to go out with other people, but right now she has this highly idealized version of this guy she is harboring in her heart and that is what she is holding on to. It is easy to give up a person, but damned near impossible to give up your hopes and expectations for that person - particularly when closure is an issue. Just try to keep her occupied. The best thing to do is to not enable this - go out with her. Try to do things together that will occupy her time in ways other than obsessing over this guy. Or, at the very least you could try to.
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