canadian303 Posted May 24, 2006 Posted May 24, 2006 my girlfriend is busy on tuesdays, wendnsdays, thursdays, and i'm busy on fridays. on the days we can see each other, away from school, it seems like shes always doing homework and has no time for me. we don't see alot of each other at school. can someone please tell me how i can get my girlfriend to spend more time with me?
norajane Posted May 24, 2006 Posted May 24, 2006 Have you tried asking her? I don't mean asking her to spend more time with you. That comes across as needy or that you're pressuring her when it sounds like she's already under some school pressures. I mean have you tried asking her out to do something specific, something fun, like going to hear a new band playing, or to a bar for a game of darts, or to a ball game?
Author canadian303 Posted May 24, 2006 Author Posted May 24, 2006 i'm going to talk to her about it. and when she tells me what she has for homework, it sounds like stuff that would take me an hour and its taking her a couple of hours and she's smarter than i am.
Author canadian303 Posted May 24, 2006 Author Posted May 24, 2006 and i want to do something with her, she doesn't have time to do anything with me
Walk Posted May 24, 2006 Posted May 24, 2006 I think you need to give her the time to work on her school work. She's not ditching you for friends, or other activities, but something that is going to better her future. Instead of focusing on how much time you two spend together, why don't you work on the quality of the time together. Make each moment you get with her the best it can be, and enjoy it. She needs to put school first right now, and she's smart for doing that. Make sure you support her in this too. Maybe the two of you could set aside a few hours on the weekends to spend time together and have fun. How often do you see her now? And how do you spend that time when you are together?
Author canadian303 Posted May 24, 2006 Author Posted May 24, 2006 her and me spend about 2 hours together a week. and she has lots of time to do her homework.
mattea Posted May 24, 2006 Posted May 24, 2006 just because she's smart doesn't mean she can finish her homework as quickly as you might. i spend a lot more time on homework that i think i might because it just takes me a long time to think through things and i am sort of a perfectionist. it's hard to break that, even though i wish i could be a little more efficient with my time. as far as spending more time together, i agree that making demands could put pressure and seem needy. however, i don't think there's anything wrong with saying that you really enjoy spending time with her and wish you could see her more and asking if the two of you could talk about if/how that's possible. maybe you could work on your homework while hanging out together and take breaks to make dinner or something? i know it's hard to be accepting when she's busy but i don't think it's personal she's just making school a priority. i know it's tough when there's a difference of how much time you're wanting/able to spend together but that is truly normal. it's hard to find two people who are completely matched on that. two hours a week isn't much, though, so i do think you should talk about it
Leveler Posted May 25, 2006 Posted May 25, 2006 Or maybe she's just not looking at your relationship as a long-term one. After all, even if she is busy, she can find time (at least on the weekends) to get with you and do the things that lovers do. The reality may be that either she doesn't view this relationship as being anything serious or she's getting ready to ditch you. But you won't know either way until you ask her for more time -- and you have the right to do that -- and ask her where do you fit in her world.
alphamale Posted May 26, 2006 Posted May 26, 2006 actually, the less you see of each other the better. keeps that air of mystery that many relationships need. not only that, but it'll be easier for you to mess around....if you know what I mean *wink wink*
Pyro Posted May 26, 2006 Posted May 26, 2006 my girlfriend is busy on tuesdays, wendnsdays, thursdays, and i'm busy on fridays. on the days we can see each other, away from school, it seems like shes always doing homework and has no time for me. we don't see alot of each other at school. can someone please tell me how i can get my girlfriend to spend more time with me? I hear ya. When fall and winter semesters are going on, my GF and I are like strangers to each other but look at it as a positive. You won't run the risk of annoying each other, you are both preparing for a better future, and when you do see each other, it will be that much more amazing because you know that you will have to make the most of what short time that the two of you have together.
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