JackJack Posted May 23, 2006 Posted May 23, 2006 Ok so yesterday I'm sitting at lunch with some co-workers of mine. I have no clue how we got on the subject, if I remember correctly I think they were talking about some other co-worker they know who is cheating on his wife. Anyway this one co-worker of mine who I know, but don't know well, chimes in with his 2 cents stating that all men or women who are married or in a committed relationship at some point in their lives will cheat. I remember thinking WTF is he talking about? So I chime in and say, "You mean to tell me you actaully think that even if a couple has been married lets say 50 -60 years, that one of them if not both has cheated?" He then tells me, "Yes thats correct. No one married for that long can stay faithful to one person. Man or woman." He then says that either the man or woman or both at some point in the relationship will cheat. Even if its just once, it will happen. I could fele my blood boil from this mans lack of knowledge. I asked him why he thought that, did he come from a bad relationship and where did he get his info? All the man can seem to say is, its a fact. But yet he wont share what facts or where he got them. My guess is he has no clue what he is talking about, there are no facts on the matter, and he is just pulling straws from thin air. He also says anyone that has bee married that long or in a relationship that long, would probably not confess to others of their doings, that if they were asked if in 50 years of marriage have they cheated, if they said no, chances are it would be a lie. BTW, I asked him by cheating if he was meaning emotional too, he says sure, emotional cheating will always happen, but as far as the physical aspect of cheating, he says thats garunteed to happen as well. I think he is a nutbar, anyone else agree?
KittenMoon Posted May 23, 2006 Posted May 23, 2006 I think this is just indicative of a culture that is trying to make cheating socially acceptable. People try to rationalize utter disrespect for their significant other just cause they want to feel less guilty about giving into what they think are uncontrollable natural urges.
Author JackJack Posted May 23, 2006 Author Posted May 23, 2006 He is not married, and I even asked him if he had any plans of getting married. his response was, "No why should I buy the cow when I can get the milk for free?" That is bascially his mind set. I'm so glad he speaks for all people, because according to him, he does. I usually try to avoid him.
SmoochieFace Posted May 23, 2006 Posted May 23, 2006 He is not married, and I even asked him if he had any plans of getting married. his response was, "No why should I buy the cow when I can get the milk for free?" That is bascially his mind set. I'm so glad he speaks for all people. I usually tried to avoid him. Is he a member of LS by any chance? He sounds a bit familiar... especially from the quote.
KittenMoon Posted May 23, 2006 Posted May 23, 2006 He is not married, and I even asked him if he had any plans of getting married. his response was, "No why should I buy the cow when I can get the milk for free?" That is bascially his mind set. I'm so glad he speaks for all people, because according to him, he does. I usually try to avoid him. I try to take solace in the fact that these people will never truly experience a deep, loving relationship. They'll just get milk.
Author JackJack Posted May 23, 2006 Author Posted May 23, 2006 Is he a member of LS by any chance? He sounds a bit familiar... especially from the quote. What quote? And to my knowledge he is not a memeber here. Are you my co-worker is disguise Smoochie?
alphamale Posted May 23, 2006 Posted May 23, 2006 I think this is just indicative of a culture that is trying to make cheating socially acceptable. People try to rationalize utter disrespect for their significant other just cause they want to feel less guilty about giving into what they think are uncontrollable natural urges. Incorrect KM....yours in a puritanical and neo-conservative point of view. Many other cultures accept that marriages and people are flawed and that some people will cheat. These same cultures accept this as reality and instead of trying to hide these "bad" things they just deal with them. For example....in some European and Latin societies it is accepted for a rich and powerful man to have mistresses as long as he is respectful of his wife and family. These same cultures laughed at the U.S. when the Monica-gate fiasco occurred. Americans in general have a very hypocritical view of sex, marriage and fidelity.
SmoochieFace Posted May 23, 2006 Posted May 23, 2006 What quote? And to my knowledge he is not a memeber here. Are you my co-worker is disguise Smoochie? Uh, the "no why should I buy the cow when I can get the milk for free" quote. Did you forget that part? Nope, no-one named *JackJack* in this office. Must not be me then, huh?
Author JackJack Posted May 23, 2006 Author Posted May 23, 2006 Uh, the "no why should I buy the cow when I can get the milk for free" quote. Did you forget that part? Nope, no-one named *JackJack* in this office. Must not be me then, huh? Ok well it was a joke about you being my co-worker. Anyway that quote seems to be quite famous for some people especailly those that enjoy getting the "milk for free." But hey whatever floats peoples boats I suposse.
KittenMoon Posted May 23, 2006 Posted May 23, 2006 Incorrect KM....yours in a puritanical and neo-conservative point of view. Many other cultures accept that marriages and people are flawed and that some people will cheat. These same cultures accept this as reality and instead of trying to hide these "bad" things they just deal with them. For example....in some European and Latin societies it is accepted for a rich and powerful man to have mistresses as long as he is respectful of his wife and family. These same cultures laughed at the U.S. when the Monica-gate fiasco occurred. Americans in general have a very hypocritical view of sex, marriage and fidelity. I hate that neoconservative and puritanical belief crap. It's accusatory. And I'm infinitly tired of people erring on the side of "liberal" beliefs. It doesn't matter what belief structure you have, it comes down to what you WANT. Those other cultures can believe what they want. Hell, I'll fully support anyone having some action on the side as long as their partner is cool with it. What is disrespectful is when someone has an affair while KNOWING their SO (male or female) does not want them to. And in this culture, there's still a very high rate of people who want faithful partners. ANd then there's the people who try to justify cheating on these people, hoping they can make it socially acceptable so when the SO is devastated, destroyed, and suicidal, they can say, "But I still LOVE only YOU." It's selfish to the Nth degree. At least this co-worker is smart enough NOT to buy the cow if he only wants the milk for free. It's hypocritcal to buy the cow, get the milk elsewhere, then tell the first cow that it is puritanical and conservative for not accepting infidelity.
JadeStar Posted May 23, 2006 Posted May 23, 2006 Well IMO, I think its possible that your co-worker gets his "facts" notice I said HIS, from maybe bad relationships he has had. Or maybe his parent(s) cheated on each other. Or he comes from a family where lots of family members cheated and so he thinks this is the way it works, for ALL people. He applies this to his life, but for him to assume or come across that its that way for ALL people is just silly, not even logical really. Since you asked him where he gets his facts and he can not seem to tell you, says that he is probably speaking from things that happened in his life. You should tell him next time you talk with him, that thats fine if thats the way HE sees it, but HE can not speak for ALL people. Jade
Outcast Posted May 23, 2006 Posted May 23, 2006 .yours in a puritanical and neo-conservative point of view. What a sad, lame, narrow, cynical point of view. Loyalty and faithfulness and love are wonderful things and there are plenty of people who believe in them and practice them. Of course people who shun ethical behaviour rationalize their actions by claiming that 'everyone else' also shuns ethical behaviour. After all, you can't believe yourself a superior being any longer if you admit that perhaps you are actually behaving badly.
Recommended Posts