Confused5135 Posted May 22, 2006 Posted May 22, 2006 It started a week ago, well, it started several years before, he would glance at me, and we would hold a eyes for longer then we should. "accidental touching", hugs being held to long, thoughts that neither should have, sure, it has all been there, but neither acted upon it, nor spoke of it until last week. Last week he admitted his love for me, he admitted that he has wanted to be with me for a long time and that he has always seen me that way. He then asked me my thoughts on it, I left, as I was scared at what to say and what I would have said. However, courtesy of the great technology that we have, he texted me and called me so that he could have his answer, after several texts and phone calls, he finally looked at me and told me that he knew my answer, which he did all along. We kissed for the first time, it was so passionate, so tender, so full of love, when we are together all I can think about is him and me, when we are separate, all I can think about is what the hell am I doing? He is married, has been for 31 years, a very unhappy marriage, has been for a while, he is afraid to be alone, she can not financially support herself. I have been married for 8 years, our marriage is dead as well, and it is the same with us, I am unable to financially support our family by myself and he can't be alone. Infidelity is nothing new to my marriage, husband left me for his best friends wife four years ago and wanted a marriage with her. After months of talking and realizing he came back and I said ok. Things have/will never be the same since. I told MM that I can not do this, that I am not ready for an affair, that two wrongs don't make a right, and I can do this when he isnt in front of me, but once he is standing there next to me, all logic goes out the window. This isn't my husbands fault, this isn't MM fault, it is my own. I did this, I kissed him back, I told him yes, that I had feelings for him. I just don't know where it will go from here. If it wasn't MM would it have been another person, more then likely. I was searching for something that I didn't have in the marriage, husband doesn't really talk to me, hell, we don't sleep in the same room. Haven't had sex in 3 months, and like most boys, if he isn't getting it from me, he is probably getting it somewhere else. I am not putting blame on anyone but myself, but this is the background, some of it, behind our marriage. I don't know where the question is, maybe I just wanted to get this out, off of my chest and have people comment as they will.
Author Confused5135 Posted May 22, 2006 Author Posted May 22, 2006 I haven't made ANY excuses. I have flat out said what is going on, I have flat out said that the only reason I am in it is financial. How is that making excuses? If I made enough to support my family, it wouldn't be an issue, but I don't, and I can't, and neither can he by himself.
Guest Posted May 23, 2006 Posted May 23, 2006 I haven't made ANY excuses. I have flat out said what is going on, I have flat out said that the only reason I am in it is financial. How is that making excuses? If I made enough to support my family, it wouldn't be an issue, but I don't, and I can't, and neither can he by himself. I would post in the OW/OM forum. They will better understand your story.
Chump64 Posted May 24, 2006 Posted May 24, 2006 Neither of you has to support your families alone. If you divorce your spouse, you split all your assets and share custody 50/50, you will share all costs 50/50. Same for your MM. If you get a greater share of custody than 50/50, you will receive child support. Your financial excuse makes me laugh. Getting caught can involve divorce any way, and it could be a lot more costly and hostile. Who knows, the MM's wife may even be able to sue you. Sounds like you can't afford this affair.
Recommended Posts