Lost_an_never_found Posted May 19, 2006 Posted May 19, 2006 What in the hell can I do I try to make my mom happy? It seems that I am the one getting sucked in to her black hole...I am becoming the unhappy one! I can't keep this up or my life is going to pass me by. How do I tell her I love her an let her go at the same time? She won't understand an There is no way to make her, so what do I do ???? please HELP ME!!!!!!
Pink_Tulip Posted May 19, 2006 Posted May 19, 2006 The only person who can make your mom happy is your mom. You are repeatedly setting yourself up for failure if you keep trying to make her happy, and you are continuing a cycle of her dependence on you. Are you still living at home? Maybe buy her a good self help book. I hear that 'self matters' by Dr Phil is pretty good for regaining your self esteem.
mental_traveller Posted May 20, 2006 Posted May 20, 2006 You can't make her happy, only she can do that. I suggest you keep her at a long distance, and if necessary tell her to go take a hike. Explain if she gives you grief then you will cut off all contact. It's either that or put up with her nonsense for the rest of your life.
Guest Posted May 27, 2006 Posted May 27, 2006 Tell her how you feel, without upsetting her. Sometimes people have issues that put a burden in their life, it can be something in the past, career, sickness, depression, anxiety, a man that hurt her, It can many things. Sometimes as adults we decide that life is over because we never accomplished what we wanted to accomplish, we have regrets, feel bad and hurt and nothing we do makes us feel better. On the other hand, is your mom single? If she is maybe she feels unloved and lonely. If this is the case maybe you can go out with her, depending on where you live go to a local bar/restaurant/club or invite friends over, have dinner, laugh, enjoy each others company, slowly but surely she'll probably come around. If you are putting your life on hold try not to because their are times when mothers get used to their daughters sticking around and in reality you have seperate lives, your mom did her life in the sense where she had her children, it is not right for her to put the pressure on you. But any in case abandoning her is not the solution. If you are having a conversation with her and she says something negative, respond with a positive answer, many times a person only understands negativeness and has a problem speaking positively. I am not a Doctor, but hope that this can help you.
Guest001 Posted May 31, 2006 Posted May 31, 2006 Well she needs to know the difficulty of finding a good woman out there. Its not easy thats for dang sure. Its your life you gotta live it and no one else can. When taking a girl to meet your mom for the first time tell her somethings obout your mom that will give her a leg up on their conversations. My mom hasnt like a whole lot of women that Ive introduced her to. She'll tell me what she thinks but other than that she knows Im gonna do what I want to do and pretty much leave it at that. Now pop on the other hand knows better, when she walks in the door hes all about "do you have a sister". LOL
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