Pebbles0018 Posted May 18, 2006 Posted May 18, 2006 I have know this man for a few years. I saw everything in his marriage from the wedding to his child grow. We just hung out in a group of friends and flirted a little every once and a while, but nothing serious. Anyways now he is going through a divorce and we are hanging out more and getting closer. I just also got out of a bad realationship. So we know what eachother is going through and we talk a lot. We also just had our first kiss! I don't want drama because I know the wife and her family and we are from a pretty small town. But we really like eachother's company and have talked of starting a relationship. I just want to know what to do and what not to do. I don't want to mess this up for anyone.
Annacabana Posted May 22, 2006 Posted May 22, 2006 I personally would not have a relationship with a newly divorced person. I wouldn't want to be the rebound relationship. I also wouldn't want to be in a relationship with a man who flirted while he was married. That would always be in the back of my mind,the trust issues. Going through a divorce means he is still married though, I would let things cool down before it went any further.
Gunny376 Posted May 22, 2006 Posted May 22, 2006 As Daddy use to say, "Heed a Fool's Advice" I'm 49, married once ~ shacked up with another for 6-1/2 years. This is what I've learned from the experience. Men have it harder 'emotionally' than women when it comes to divorce ~ because much of their social~emotional network comes from the wife, and the family ~ friends that came about as a result of the marriage ~ and so when they go through a divorce ~ they're mentally, emotionally bankrupt. Don't get involved with anyone ~ who hasn't been divorced at least two years after the ink has dried on the actual divorce papers. It takes years to recover, mentally, psychologically, spiritually ~ and most definately financially from a divorce. If there are kids involved ~ multiply times five! Re-bound is a bitch, a lying bitch! There are reasons, they got divorced ~ and it wasn't just the other person You can and will "lie" to yourself! Relationships are easy to get into ~ hard to maintain ~ and hard to get out of! Used men/women are like used cars! If they were worth a damn to begin with the orginal owner would have kept them in the first place. Personally, if a woman tells me she's separated, going through a divorce, just got a divorce ~ I avoid them like the plague. I might ~ might consider someone who's been divorced for two years. If I were a woman ~ I would make that three to five years. Finally, the mere fact that you posted here means your internal radar is going off ~ as though China had just launched nukes toward the US ~ by posting here ~you've answered your own question ~ listen to that little inner voice that's screaming at you!
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