PandorasBox Posted May 18, 2006 Posted May 18, 2006 Some firneds and I were talking the other day, and I forget how the subject was brought up, but my friend husband made the comment that women who stayed at home, were what he called "kept women." I asked him what he meant by this, and his wife wanted to know as well. Of course she works, but his point was that some women have it really good at home. He wasn't meaning that all women have it easy, especailly if they have kids, theres alot of work involved in that itself. However, he was meaning really a woman that stays home is "kept" in the sence that if a man is the soul provider, earns the money, puts food on the table, clothes on everyones backs, warms beds to sleep in, a roof over their head, vacations sometimes, etc etc, and the woman stays at home, then shes a "kept woman". Do others see this as true? Or if you are a woman that stays home, and your husband is the main provider, do you look at it as being "kept." My friend says women shouldn't be offened by the term "kept", and that they get the good end of the deal. Do others agree?
LucreziaBorgia Posted May 18, 2006 Posted May 18, 2006 "Kept" to me suggests the exchange of financial stability in return for fidelity. I've always associated the term "kept woman" not with stay-at-home wives with breadwinner husbands, but with mistresses who the MM 'keeps' by plying her with financial stability in return for her fidelity and availability to him. I don't see stay-at-home wives/mothers as "kept", because fidelity is a given in the marital relationship and there is a joint understanding in these situations between the partners that it is the husband's job to provide financially for his family while the SAHW/M provides domestically. I guess it depends on how you define 'kept' though.
Adunaphel Posted May 18, 2006 Posted May 18, 2006 English is not my native tongue, so I might have a wrong perception of the word "kept", but I'd find it an offensive choice of words. My idea of a "kept woman" is a lot more similar to my idea of a "prostitute with only one customer", than to my idea of a "mother who stays at home with the kids" or of a "housewife".
Author PandorasBox Posted May 18, 2006 Author Posted May 18, 2006 English is not my native tongue, so I might have a wrong perception of the word "kept", but I'd find it an offensive choice of words. My idea of a "kept woman" is a lot more similar to my idea of a "prostitute with only one customer", than to my idea of a "mother who stays at home with the kids" or of a "housewife". I totally agree with this. When my friends and I were talking about it, another friend a guy got involved in the convo. He said his view on a "kept woman" was that of a prosititute as well. BUT, he was meaning women who are married are a prosititute to their husbands so he sees that as being "kept". He says if man provides a home, clothes, food, shelter, the women provides or can provide him with sex, so there fore she is "kept.":confused:
SmoochieFace Posted May 18, 2006 Posted May 18, 2006 Some firneds and I were talking the other day, and I forget how the subject was brought up, but my friend husband made the comment that women who stayed at home, were what he called "kept women." I asked him what he meant by this, and his wife wanted to know as well. Of course she works, but his point was that some women have it really good at home. He wasn't meaning that all women have it easy, especailly if they have kids, theres alot of work involved in that itself. However, he was meaning really a woman that stays home is "kept" in the sence that if a man is the soul provider, earns the money, puts food on the table, clothes on everyones backs, warms beds to sleep in, a roof over their head, vacations sometimes, etc etc, and the woman stays at home, then shes a "kept woman". Do others see this as true? Or if you are a woman that stays home, and your husband is the main provider, do you look at it as being "kept." My friend says women shouldn't be offened by the term "kept", and that they get the good end of the deal. Do others agree? The word for that sort of woman is HOUSEWIFE not KEPT.
blind_otter Posted May 18, 2006 Posted May 18, 2006 I totally agree with this. When my friends and I were talking about it, another friend a guy got involved in the convo. He said his view on a "kept woman" was that of a prosititute as well. BUT, he was meaning women who are married are a prosititute to their husbands so he sees that as being "kept". He says if man provides a home, clothes, food, shelter, the women provides or can provide him with sex, so there fore she is "kept.":confused: Ostensibly there is an exchange of goods for services in a marital relationship with a SAH wife. SHe does the things that he would normally have to do himself. Upkeep of the house, cleaning, cooking, and childcare. All those services, if provided by outside sources, would cost money. And in terms of consumption of time, I suppose you could guesstimate how much it would cost the man to do all these things himself. If there is no exchange of services, then I would say it would be accurate to call them kept women. But IMO, the wife takes on the role of personal assistant and housekeeper. I agree with LB, the whole concept of "kept woman" insinuates that there is no contribution on the part of the female who is kept.
catgirl1927 Posted May 18, 2006 Posted May 18, 2006 English is not my native tongue, so I might have a wrong perception of the word "kept", but I'd find it an offensive choice of words. My idea of a "kept woman" is a lot more similar to my idea of a "prostitute with only one customer", than to my idea of a "mother who stays at home with the kids" or of a "housewife". I agree with this. To call a stay at home mom or housewife a "kept" woman is just wrong. Unless of course they're just in the relationship for the money and in fact don't contribute anything. I'm not saying that the institution of marriage keeps someone from being a hooker with only one customer. I'm sure there are a lot of older guys who have trophy wives who are basically "kept." But that is a very derogatory term, and I wouldn't throw it around without knowing people because it's a really mean thing to call someone. IMO.
alphamale Posted May 18, 2006 Posted May 18, 2006 My friend says women shouldn't be offened by the term "kept", and that they get the good end of the deal. Do others agree? a "kept woman" PANDORA is a mistress who's bills are paid by a rich man who keeps her on the side or sexual gratification only. a wife who stays at home and takes care of the house and kids is not really "kept" becuase she is earning her keep. she's also raising the kids who will pass on the husbands DNA and name.
basscatcher Posted May 18, 2006 Posted May 18, 2006 a "kept woman" PANDORA is a mistress who's bills are paid by a rich man who keeps her on the side or sexual gratification only. OMG I had this offer last spring by a man online. He wanted me for sexual gratification and he would pay my bills, clothe me, give me a nice car to drive, etc. etc as long as I was faithful to him and only him and I wouldn't tell anyone of our knowing one another. He talked about taking me on vactions out of the area so we could spend long weekends together and such... I couldn't believe he was offering me such a thing. I told him he was crazy and full of it. I told him I didn't believe him and he swore he was sincere... The man lives North of the cities and is married. No childen. He even gave me his phone number WHICH I deleted. There are men out there like this. I don't know if he was real or not but it sure tripped me out. NO I didnt' become his 'kept' woman... Yuck for degrading. I am worth more then someones sexslave.
alphamale Posted May 18, 2006 Posted May 18, 2006 OMG I had this offer last spring by a man online. He wanted me for sexual gratification and he would pay my bills, clothe me, give me a nice car to drive, etc. etc as long as I was faithful to him and only him who was it? Jesse Ventura?
basscatcher Posted May 18, 2006 Posted May 18, 2006 who was it? Jesse Ventura? Don't think so.. He had a full head of dark hair. Middle 40s maybe near 50. He was very good looking.. (Webcam is nice.. ) He was in a suit and tie.. Nice tan.. I can't share a man.. I will make me sick...
ronnieromance Posted May 18, 2006 Posted May 18, 2006 I've always thought of kept women in a different way. I beleive in the idea that definitions change with time...Languge as a sort of organism. But I feel a working definition of it is a stay-at-home wife/mother/whatever. Bills get paid by the man, just like in the trqaditional definition, right. She is often in a position of reliance on the man, in that she has learned to need his monetary support. There are a million ways to look at this. I see a lot of women going to college in order to net guys promising guys before graduation. Hell, I even see it on the internet with sites like wealthymen.com. A lot of women value wealth and use the terms "security" or "stability" instead. Nothing wrong with having money. And I don't agree with the idea that a kept woman, even in the strictest and most traditional whore-esqe sense of the word, doesn't contribute. Some just more than others. -R-
Recommended Posts