budd98 Posted May 18, 2006 Posted May 18, 2006 I have been dating a girl for 16 months now. She is 24 and I am 26. We have been struggling with our relationship within the past couple months and it has caused it to be off and on at times. She is really insecure. Just a little feedback. In a bar situation she can talk to a hundred guys, but if I talk to one girl she blows up. She always thinks I am up to something, but I never have. Her b-day was 3 weeks ago and her dad bought her a trip 2 vegas. She was going with her g/f and her dad. She also told me she was going to visit some of her other family this summer in other states too. Well, the vegas trip bothered me, but I never told her that. So when we were broke up for a few days, I bought a trip to go see my brother in Arizona. We ended up getting back together and triing to work things out the next week, but I still never told her about the trip I had bought. Her trip to vegas was a flop, so I finally told her about mine on sunday. The trip is for next week. Anyways, she blew up. She told me that she has never hated anyone more then me and that I ruined any chance we had. I don't understand why me going to visit my brother would wreck any chances. Her last text message on monday was that I could buy a trip to go party with my bro, but can't take her on one. Monday was the last time I talked to her. She won't answer my calls or text's anymore. I really love this girl and I feel she is really over reacting. Why is she acting this way? Is there anything I can do or say to make things right? She says we are over and she never wants to see me again, is that true? This no contact from her is killing me inside. Do you think I should not communicate back? Should I cancel my trip? Please help me! thanks!
Zeppelin456 Posted May 18, 2006 Posted May 18, 2006 Others will answer more eloquently I'm sure, but let me be the first to say, do NOT cancel your trip for this nutcase.
Whitt Posted May 18, 2006 Posted May 18, 2006 Don't cancel your trip - do you really want to be with someone who controls your every move? Why is it she thinks she can do what she wants and you can't have any life? She sounds very spoiled. This girl needs some time to grow up. I imagine if you quit calling and texting her that she will start calling you.
destination_unknown Posted May 18, 2006 Posted May 18, 2006 I think your girlfriend is acting this way due to the insecurity you mentioned. When people are insecure, they are so fearful of losing the person they love that they desperately attempt to control that person. I'm not sure that this is a problem that you can really solve. Even if you guys were on fairly good terms, all you could do is encourage her to do things independently from you. Saying you ruined every chance you had may be an attempt to make you panic that the relationship is really over and bring you back, with a little bit more power on her side. I'm not saying your girlfriend is doing this consciously, she is more than likely completely unaware of what she is doing. I suggest you go NC and there is a good chance she will relent. Then you need to discuss these issues. You may both have something to work on.
Guest Posted May 18, 2006 Posted May 18, 2006 She did call me last night. We only talked for 5 minutes and she hung up on me again. She is so good at that. She said that she hates me so much. Then she kept texting me for a couple of hours. Said that if I meant anything at all, I should cancel that trip. She said that it is like spring break there all the time at havasu and that I will probably get aids. I told her to come with then, and she asked the price of tickets. Well, I don't want her with because my time with my brother would suck if she was there. That is the whole point of going by myself. And she asked why I had to go over a weekend. Wow, is all I was thinking on that. Finally she said that I got even at her for going on a trip when she was going on one too, but hers was a flop. Do you think she will regret saying that she hates me so much? She also said she is throwing all our stuff away. The more I think about everything, the more it is driving me away from her.
Author budd98 Posted May 18, 2006 Author Posted May 18, 2006 She did call me last night. We only talked for 5 minutes and she hung up on me again. She is so good at that. She said that she hates me so much. Then she kept texting me for a couple of hours. Said that if I meant anything at all, I should cancel that trip. She said that it is like spring break there all the time at havasu and that I will probably get aids. I told her to come with then, and she asked the price of tickets. Well, I don't want her with because my time with my brother would suck if she was there. That is the whole point of going by myself. And she asked why I had to go over a weekend. Wow, is all I was thinking on that. Finally she said that I got even at her for going on a trip when she was going on one too, but hers was a flop. Do you think she will regret saying that she hates me so much? She also said she is throwing all our stuff away. The more I think about everything, the more it is driving me away from her.
Zeppelin456 Posted May 18, 2006 Posted May 18, 2006 yo, she's being utterly ridiculous. cut contact now. seriously, if someone who wasn't your ex did this to you, would you even give them the time of day?
GB111 Posted May 18, 2006 Posted May 18, 2006 I'm with Zeppelin. That's so childish, it sounds like something a 3 year old (literally) would do. Do you really want to spend more time with this person? You'll regret it if you do. Oh, and if you really care, she doesn't hate you. Just wants you to pine over her little temper tantrum.
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