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Posted

You maybe having an affair right now. I have been there and done that. I had an affair with a married man at the age of 21, so I learned early what a joke this type of relationship is. I was with him for two years, and yes he did leave his wife for me, but even after this happend, the relationship failed withtin two monthes after he left. During the two years, I went through a lot of pain that I should not have gone through. Thank God, this relationship has failed, because now I have met man of my dreams, and the best thing is, he is single and loves only me.All of you who are having affairs deserve to be in a real relationship, one with a man who is devoted to you and only you.

Posted
You maybe having an affair right now. I have been there and done that. I had an affair with a married man at the age of 21, so I learned early what a joke this type of relationship is. I was with him for two years, and yes he did leave his wife for me, but even after this happend, the relationship failed withtin two monthes after he left. During the two years, I went through a lot of pain that I should not have gone through. Thank God, this relationship has failed, because now I have met man of my dreams, and the best thing is, he is single and loves only me.All of you who are having affairs deserve to be in a real relationship, one with a man who is devoted to you and only you.

Thanks for posting that. There are a few women who are here on this forum that are contemplating an A that is of the same age you were when you started yours. I'm really glad to see you put in your thoughts here.

 

What happened 2 months after he left if you don't mind my asking?

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Posted

The relationship basically broke down. I took the frustration I had pent up for two years, he had a mental breakdown. Eventually, he just went back to his wife. My final verdict? She can have him! I met my soulmate.

Posted

Good for you!

 

I am so happy for you.

 

Keep posting. There are alot of women here who need to hear what you have to say!

 

WA

Posted
You maybe having an affair right now. I have been there and done that. I had an affair with a married man at the age of 21, so I learned early what a joke this type of relationship is. I was with him for two years, and yes he did leave his wife for me, but even after this happend, the relationship failed withtin two monthes after he left. During the two years, I went through a lot of pain that I should not have gone through. Thank God, this relationship has failed, because now I have met man of my dreams, and the best thing is, he is single and loves only me.All of you who are having affairs deserve to be in a real relationship, one with a man who is devoted to you and only you.

 

easier said than done, huh? i have a friend who is consistently VERY unhappy with lots of things in his life--most things, in fact. and i wonder why he continues to make choices that seem to perpetuate the unhappiness--the path to a calmer life seems clear...

 

...and at the same time, i can see the level of emotional development of this person and so it makes total sense why he continues to do what he does. he's just not there yet to a place to make better choices. and we're all in that place to an extent, huh? not loving ourselves enough as we deserve to be loved?

 

i vascillate between wanting to accept people where they are and wanting to SHAKE them! :) and myself, of course. you give great advice...and at the same time, people hear what they're ready to hear and often only see the truth in other people's advice after they've already learned the lesson for themselves.

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Posted

That's very true, it's only when they come to the point within themselves can they end this type of relationship. I know, no one was going to tell me to leave the MM, I had to do it on my own, but looking back, I had wished I had listened to all those people who told me to end it. Even after you leave, there is a ton of emotional healing that has to go on after. The quicker you get out of the OW/OM relationship, then quicker you can save your safe from a lot of emotional damage and the quicker you can be with someone who really cares about you, because I can assure you, the person that is married and seeing another person, doesn't love anyone, not their spouse, not the person they are seeing on the side, and not even themselves. Because the harsh truth of it is, if they really were mature and capable enough for love, they would not be cheating, they would have respected thier partner enough have gone to counseling, or if they could not have worked it out, they would have filed for divorce. If they really cared for you, they probably would have not gone out and found you in the first place. Someone who really cares about thier partner, does not cheat, and does not keep another woman/man waiting for them.If they really loved you You would have met them when they were aleady divorced.

Posted

This is the most accurate and exactly-correct advice I have ever read on this entire forum. THANK YOU!!!!!!

Posted

This is brilliant advice. You are 100% correct.

Posted
That's very true, it's only when they come to the point within themselves can they end this type of relationship. I know, no one was going to tell me to leave the MM, I had to do it on my own, but looking back, I had wished I had listened to all those people who told me to end it. Even after you leave, there is a ton of emotional healing that has to go on after. The quicker you get out of the OW/OM relationship, then quicker you can save your safe from a lot of emotional damage and the quicker you can be with someone who really cares about you, because I can assure you, the person that is married and seeing another person, doesn't love anyone, not their spouse, not the person they are seeing on the side, and not even themselves. Because the harsh truth of it is, if they really were mature and capable enough for love, they would not be cheating, they would have respected thier partner enough have gone to counseling, or if they could not have worked it out, they would have filed for divorce. If they really cared for you, they probably would have not gone out and found you in the first place. Someone who really cares about thier partner, does not cheat, and does not keep another woman/man waiting for them.If they really loved you You would have met them when they were aleady divorced.

Well said, I could not say it any better!!! I am glad that you are now on the road to a healthy life!!!

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