Has anyone entered a legal seperation agreement?

[Lindzamay]

hi there

 

my husband is a lawyer and has brought me the seperation agreement to read over, and in it, it says that reconciling, or having marital relations during the agreement is completely allowed, and the agreement still holds ground as long as we dont put it in writing that we're absolving the agreement

 

I thought, that in order for the one year apart to be true and legal, that no marital relations (sex) was allowed?

 

I live in state of NY, if someone can clarify

 

ps yes i will be bringing it to a lawyer

[CryingCanuck]

Lindzamay;

 

Not absolutely sure about NY State, but from most that I've read, here in Canada and in most States in the US, sexual relations with your X does NOT stop the clock whatsoever, you must live together as a couple for 30 days or more to put the clock back to square 1. Sleeping together, going away for a week , two weeks whatever.... does not constitute living together again and the 1 year period would continue as if there was no break at all.

 

JMHO

 

Cunuck

[Curmudgeon]

I believe that's fairly standard language and the separation is valid from the date it's filed until either a divorce takes place or the separation agreement is revoked by both parties.

 

Similar language was in the separation agreement I was served with here in California. However, three days later I counter-filed for divorce so the agreement provisions regarding support, custody, visitation, etc. became a part of the divorce agreement.

[EnigmaXOXO]

I live in the states, and I was specifically advised that having sexual relations or spending the night under the same roof could absolutely set me back to square one. Particularly if my husband wanted to contest the divorce, it would indicate (in his favor) that we were making an attempt at a reconciliation.

 

At a matter of fact, I had to bring a witness before the magistrate at my final hearing to testify that there was no indication that my husband and I were attempting to reconcile, that we had been spending the night together, or that we were having any conjugal visits. He even went so far as to ask my witness if they had seen any of my husband's personal belongings on the premises that might indicate that he was still spending time there.

 

Of course, one can draft anything into a separation agreement so long as the other party is agreeable and willing to sign. But for your own safety, I would recommend securing an attorney of your own (who has your best interests at heart) to go over the legalities of what your husband is proposing … before putting your signature on anything!

[Lindzamay]

To be honest - there is a reconciliation clause in there...it says that if we reconcile or resume marital relations, the seperation agreement is NOT affected unless we put it in writing and submit it to the courts

 

even IF we RECONCILE

 

doesnt that seem strange? that says that even if we decided to live togehter again, we can still get a divorce by year seperation

 

How does that seem?

[Cecelius]

It's intended to preserve the amount of the waiting period that has already passed without additional action by the parties.

[Guest]

do you mean the waiting time between our break up and the paperwork being filed?

He told me the agreement doesnt come into effect until its filed...thankx