Zeppelin456 Posted May 14, 2006 Posted May 14, 2006 I think In Sync might've made a post related to this, but I am just wondering, is it bad that I've reached the point where I dread seeing my ex? In the next few months, I've come into a situation where I'm pretty sure it's inevitable that I will see her (as opposed to the last 6 months or so, where I lived nowhere near her). I now dread seeing her so much that it's begun to overtake me just a little...isn't that against the point of NC (feeling better)?
alphamale Posted May 14, 2006 Posted May 14, 2006 I now dread seeing her so much that it's begun to overtake me just a little... this is normal Z456....if you do end up seeing her you don't have to do anything. what could be easier than that?
NotAnotherTeen Posted May 15, 2006 Posted May 15, 2006 I know how you feel. My ex goes to the same school as me (its a small town, only one school), and i have a couple classes with her. Im currently in NC also, but its hard every time i see her. Its hard to have to ignore someone, and the fact that you are blatanly ignoring them just adds to the silence between you, and makes it almost tangible. And of course, I do miss her, and that makes it all the harder to ignore her. There is one thing to remember. When you do come into contact with your ex, be strong and confidant. Let her know that your doing just fine on your own.
In Sync Posted May 15, 2006 Posted May 15, 2006 I think In Sync might've made a post related to this, but I am just wondering, is it bad that I've reached the point where I dread seeing my ex? In the next few months, I've come into a situation where I'm pretty sure it's inevitable that I will see her (as opposed to the last 6 months or so, where I lived nowhere near her). I now dread seeing her so much that it's begun to overtake me just a little...isn't that against the point of NC (feeling better)? I realized that my fear or dread was a mixture of two things, at the time, was feeling of intimidation. You know that somehow because my X had dumped me, that he had some mythical power of ominpotence. That if I saw him I would wither and fall apart. It's now 7 months later..It's an absurd thought. NC will lead you through an array of emotions..it's a roller coaste. It's not a magic pill that makes you feel better it's for giving you time to heal. AND HEALING INVOLVES GOING THROUGH PAIN. What's painful for you is different for me. But the common facter is you will go through emotional pain. But it is meant to hurt so that you come thorugh it feeling stronger. It's a childish notion to not face adversity and think that it shouldn't hurt. The dread you feel will eventually give away to confidence. Wherever you go you will feel you belong. And it won't matter a hill of beans if you run into your ex. Because you are stronger.
Numbheart Posted May 15, 2006 Posted May 15, 2006 It's now 7 months later..It's an absurd thought. NC will lead you through an array of emotions..it's a roller coaste. It's not a magic pill that makes you feel better it's for giving you time to heal. AND HEALING INVOLVES GOING THROUGH PAIN. What's painful for you is different for me. But the common facter is you will go through emotional pain. But it is meant to hurt so that you come thorugh it feeling stronger. It's a childish notion to not face adversity and think that it shouldn't hurt. The dread you feel will eventually give away to confidence. Wherever you go you will feel you belong. And it won't matter a hill of beans if you run into your ex. Because you are stronger. Bravo to that, never a truer word said
riobikini Posted May 15, 2006 Posted May 15, 2006 re: Zep: ".... I've reached the point where I dread seeing my ex...." *This* is exactly what you hope for, and InSync goes on to explain the further details beautifully. InSync, I believe that was one of the best posts I've read, lately. Great job! (Smile) -Rio
Guest Posted May 19, 2006 Posted May 19, 2006 its nice trying to put on a brave face in front of your ex that you are fine and confident without them, but what if you arent? My ex broke up with me over the phone 8 months into a year of LDR, and is due back in two months. I know that he'll be putting on the confident face much easier than me, simply because he always had that edge and shutting me out is the easiest way for him to do it, along with blaming everything me, in order to make himself feel better. i live across the road from where we both study and i am dreading seeing him. a large part of me wants to leave, go study somewhere else and just get out. i dont have closure yet, and i cant really say that he's going to be nice about things, even though we are both at fault. He's not sitting there crying over me, the way I am. i just want to get out of here and be free from all of this. How to put on a face that is as brave as it is genuine?
Author Zeppelin456 Posted May 20, 2006 Author Posted May 20, 2006 i don't know, that's exactly what I'm asking. it takes some courage.
dr strangelove Posted May 20, 2006 Posted May 20, 2006 Im confused Your ex has dreads ?? dread locks? huh?
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