what the heck is going on?

[MaryJane]

hey everybody, [[i could give every aspect of the whole story, but that would mean 3 -5 pages of detail, don't wanna put u all through that lol]

I met this dude a couple weeks ago, and it was great because he seemed to be really respectful, complete opposite from my x. after a long long long while of walking, talking, joking, and teasing kind of, we kissed, and that was great being that my x was my first. i really felt like he was intrested in me, and wanted to get to know me more, i felt the same about him, and he walked me to class and we kissed again, he asked if i had class the next day, didn't have school about 4 days later, and i didn't want to chase after him b/c i think that would make me look obsessive?or desprate? i don't know, so then i saw him again monday, and he walked with me and a friend to go smoke a bowl.[yes we smoke-don't judge] i noticed him looking at me a lot so that was a good sign, the way we walked next to each other, kinda' felt something, but i just kept trying to play it cool, a little later on he had to go to class, so he said c yah, and said he had to go to an internship after wards, i said alright cool, see yah later dude, he said later.....then 2 days later, didn't have school the day before, thats why its 2 days, i see him again, [sparing all the cute details], we end up resting next to eachother on a cement table cuddling, then after awhile we make out again. were not alone so other people see this...i guess thats gotta kinda' mean sumthin; right? dosen't keep it secret....?anyway.....we then went for a walk, talking and joking again but with a lot of silence here and there, holdng hands, putting his arm around my waist etc, and then end up making out on a wall, i kept my boundaries, and i was happy to know he keep boundaries too. we walk back, and he gives me his number. the next day or two i send him a message telling him to have a great time at a concert festival he was going to, he said back thanx and if i met maynard i'll tell him my friend --- says whats up, i keep it cool, tell him to have a blast, etc. then i see him again the following week we both hang with everyone as usual, sitting near each other, time and again, he'll make his little faces here and ther i'll do the same back, people are suspecting something is going on between us, but see The Thing Here Is.....We Have Never Talked About It, and i'm afraid if i bring it up some way, it will scare him off....i don't want to get To attached just to find out he's going with this casually, yah know?....some of this is of course my fault though.....there was one day he sort of brought up about going to a concert, and he had no one to go with, i kind of brushed it off in a way,---yeah--i know..again the nervousness....and on that same day he mentions somewhere else he wanted to go on a poster he saw....saying i wanna go to that, and decribes it casually, i say cool, that sounds tight.....and thats it---i didn't say lets go or anything....so i blew it again.....later on, we decided to hang out the next day, so we do, and i show him around an area of town he's never been before, he mentions again something abuot a movie, and again my nervousness[[doing this unconciously]] brushes away the subject......later on we smoke a bowl, and we walk and walk and walk talking and talking, all of a sudden i realize how close to my house we are, and were both starving, so i bring him over and make some food, after we eat, we cuddle with each other, again the respect he gives is amazing, we watch t.v., then we start kissing again, eventually, we get really into it, and start dry humping,we sit next to each other again, teasing a lot, just watching t.v., he lets me know what he wishes he could do, calls me a tease,but he keeps his boundaries, and competly lets it go, again, that was great. I wasen't gonna go all the way for sure, becuase i need to know he's not intrested in anyone else...but u see, i don't know that...he's Does browse around for singles, he says he's single, yet we have something going on, the look on his face when we kiss, i can just tell....people are even begging to ask me...so whats going on, r u guys...together, or what.....and i don't want to start any drama or anything b/c i hate that....i just said..in a nevous jokingly voice, i-i-don't know what yer talkin about---uhhh--hmm i don't know...he was laying asleep next to me when that conversation happened. And about a few days ago, i kept my distance again, but looked over at him plenty of times, i was playing a card game, and he would come over sit next to meh, then go and talk with others in the group, etc.smile when he's joking around with people, glancing at me, i the same with him.....i thik i kept my distance too much though......i was listening to someone talk about some things, and he was next to me again laying down, afte awhile he goes, what time is it, yeah i gotta go, he usually stays a long time,b/c said way back when that theres nothing to do at his place. i think i should have put forth something.......and im really beggining to believe he thinks i don't have a strong enough intrest in him, so he's finding other peple to meet and hang out with. and the thought of that is driving me CrAzzy. is this whole thing casual?....did he want it to be exclusive? if he did, why didn't he say anythihg?....should i say something? if so, what can i say, in a way where i won't sound desprate/obsessive/etc.? If he is starting to met other ppl, what can i do? i don't think im drawing him in enough--teasing too much,hold back too much, but then don't want to be "easy"--or give him what he can have so then he can take off the next day either.arrrg im pissed off at myself-----sorry for the long complecated story, Your take on this would mean A LOT. thanks!!!

--maryjane

[Mary3]

question :

 

He saw TOOL ? (lucky guy ) they sold out here.