h_foot Posted May 12, 2006 Posted May 12, 2006 Hi I don't wanna presume my wife is cheating, but I get the feeling starting something with a co-worker whose a MM. She would talk about him and a female co-worker mentioned to my wife that this MM co-worker was hitting on my wife and that he had martial problems at home she also tells me that she has a lot in common with this MM. And the other day my wife calls me at work to ask if I had a lot to do and what time I would be home from work. Only later after I come home from work she mentions that the MM co-worker came to our house for about an hour and a half which I got pissed. And a few days later I'm reading the phone bill my wife has called this MM a total of 18 times in the last two weeks some days upto 3 to 4 times a day. I confronted wife about it and she says she has only called him a couple of times and then I tell her on the phone bill it totals upto 18 times and she replies but the phone calls a mostly 1 minutes calls, I tell there is a couple of calls that are over 30 mins and I ask her if she is calling him at his work during his work hours (wife works 3rd shift MM works 1st shift) she says she has been calling his cell phone. She keeps saying nothing is going on and they're just talking about kids and work and she says that the MM isn't hitting on her and that his does not have martial problems and they are just friends. But what worries me is my wife is very niave. And if the MM has other intentions as he may have martial problems. I told my wife to stop talking to the MM and to ignore him. My wife has agreed not to talk to him and ignore him but there is still a lingering thought in my mind she is still talking to him? Sorry for the long post but I'm worried and were about to have our 6th year anniversary. Thanks H
a4a Posted May 12, 2006 Posted May 12, 2006 well if they are just good friends why not invite him out with both of you? Does sound very fishy to me as well. You really do not have the proof that they have something going such as an emotional affair.....but my money would be a yes. IMHO of course.
Mirage222 Posted May 12, 2006 Posted May 12, 2006 I am usually the first one to look at the brighter side but in your situation I would be thinking that yes, she may be. WHY would a co-worker be at your house if he was just a co worker? Who calls a co-worker 18 times in 2 weeks? Doesn't work stay at work anyway? Unless your wife is a professional ie. Attorney, consultant, realitor where she may have to interact with co workers off duty. ?? I would put my foot down now. Is your relationship missing anything ?? Love, romamance, sex etc? Are you holding up your end in the relationship??
whichwayisup Posted May 12, 2006 Posted May 12, 2006 Ask her how SHE would feel if you started being very friendly and openly talking to another woman...Confiding in that OW, inviting that OW to YOUR house when she wasn't there - Then tell her, "If I told you don't worry honey, nothing is going to happen, we're just friends and she's going through a rough patch with her husband and needs a friend to talk to, to have someone listen to her..." How do you think your wife would react? She'd probably FREAK OUT and be full of jealously and worry that something was going on...Right? She more than likely is still talking to this MM. You have afew decisions to make... -You can trust her and just see what happens. -Install a keylogger on the computer. -Come right out and tell her that you're going to discuss this 'budding' friendship with MM, with HER husband. Put some fear into her and make her SEE what she is doing is wrong and not good for your marriage. -Head to marriage counselling and find out why she is needing the attention of MM. Find out what is missing from your marriage. I'm not saying that you are in the wrong, but she is unhappy, or some needs are not being met. Again, that isn't your fault as she should be telling you what SHE is feeling and what needs are not being met...Her choosing to look outside the marriage is a big mistake.
Bryanp Posted May 12, 2006 Posted May 12, 2006 She is bulls***ting you. She calls you to find out when you will be coming home and then invites this other man to visit her in your home? Do you think they were playing checkers? How insulting and disrespecting to you. As someone previously mentioned, how would she feel if you brought home a female co-worker that you liked and wanted to make sure she was not home.? Add this to the fact that she is calling him constantly and she knows he is hitting on her says a great deal. I think she does exactly what is going on and the chances are pretty good that some form of physical cheating has already taken place.
Sup Posted May 12, 2006 Posted May 12, 2006 Man, I would be worried about an HOUR & A HALF! ALONE! I hate to say it Man, but they most likely had S-E-X! At least from the sound of it. I would contact a lawyer and see what my rights are, if I were you. I hope there'res no children involved. Oh! You didn't notice anything out of the ordinary, like messed up sheets. You know, any kinds of evidence.
srsvfx Posted May 12, 2006 Posted May 12, 2006 sounds like she's not very good at cheating... and your not very good at picking up the signs of cheating. There's no reason for the home visits, phone calls. And she's lied about the phone calls... NEXT time i would just tell her you're going to be late from work, then bust into your house with a 9mm, check your bedroom and if your wife is in there with another man, pop the sob..
Sup Posted May 13, 2006 Posted May 13, 2006 sounds like she's not very good at cheating... and your not very good at picking up the signs of cheating. There's no reason for the home visits, phone calls. And she's lied about the phone calls... NEXT time i would just tell her you're going to be late from work, then bust into your house with a 9mm, check your bedroom and if your wife is in there with another man, pop the sob.. Only 1 problem with that, MURDER is illegal in ALL 50 states. I would NOT advise the 9mm, or any other weapon! Maybe hire a PI to check up on her?
Marcus as the Peanut Posted May 13, 2006 Posted May 13, 2006 I think your wife is at lest invalved in an Emotional Affiar. The fact that she called you to se when you are coming home, and having OM there while your not..Sugest as a minimum that you keep a close tap on here..Maybe install keylogger on your Pc to monitor her Internet usage
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