A Truly Pathetic Situation.

[GB111]

Ok, so someone had inquired about MY breakup on another thread. After taking the time to actually write this down, I thought it deserved its own thread. Very long, but extremely entertaining. Non-stop action. Enjoy.

 

 

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Two reasons I haven't gone into ANY detail before:

 

1. I was truly pathetic. Anyone reading this MUST be saying I'm an idiot or a glutton for punishment. It's embarrassing.

 

2. It's a long, sordid story. As promised, here's the ABRIDGED version.

 

Ok, so, lets call her "E".

 

So, day after Valentine's, E decides to break up with me after almost 1 year together. I take it remarkably well at the time, give her my stuff out of the car, and leave. Can't sleep that night. Text her the next day that I miss her and we should try to work things out. She does not call. NC the next day.

 

Next week, she calls me. "I miss you". I go to lunch with her. I say "lets get together and talk. She says ok. Well, she does not show up at the assigned time and place. Does not answer the phone. I ring her phone off the hook until I fall asleep out of sheer exhaustion. Next day, the phone is disconnected. Number changed. I see her at the gym the next day. She agrees to call so we can talk. Does not call at the time agreed upon. Next day. "I PROMISE I'm coming over tonight to talk to you. Guess what... NO SHOW!!! (I know, shocker).

 

She calls me, middle of the night one evening after NC:

 

"GB, I love you. I miss you. I want to be with only you forever."

"I need a woman who will be with me when times are tough, times are good, sick, healthy, rich, poor, etc., etc."

"What about the other guy"

"He's gone"

"Did you make love to him?"

"Yes, only twice and I thought of you the whole time" (PUUULEASE!)

"Ok, lets talk"

 

Back together, but no real significant time together. Honestly don't remember how she broke up with me THIS time.

 

Few days later, she says she does want to get back together, but she doesn't have time for a relationship right now. I say, ok, well, call me when you do... I go to San Diego for work. Buy her a couple of small token items to show I still care. Go to her house to give them to her after I return. She's on the sofa with another man. Beautiful. I am infuriated, and leave. I have lunch with her the next day and ask her if that's who she wants to be with. She's "confused" and doesn't know if she loves him.

 

We don't talk for a while (week, maybe?)

 

She comes to my house at 10:00PM. I show her my new house as I had just moved. We sit down on the sofa, and she attacks me. Asks if I want sex, loves me, wants to have my children. Wants to get married. Etc.

 

I say I don't want sex as I'm confused. She leaves. I have lunch with her the next day. She's sweet and nice, etc., etc. See her at the gym, she doesn't think she's ready to jump back in. I'm back on my rear.

 

About another week passes. We see each other each day, but only at the gym. She's still very sweet to me, but doesn't want to get involved yet. Finally, one day she tells me that she'd like to get together and talk about things. I say "ok", but frankly, don't take it very seriously. She calls me 15 min. before I'm *evidently* supposed to meet her, and she says "are you coming?" I say, ummm I'm eating right now, but I'll come by. Go to the restaurant, she's sitting and has already bought me a sandwich. I eat it, we reconcile. Ok, good.

 

Go to her house to sleep that night. Everything is fine. Wake up in the morning; go to work. Everything is fine. 2:00PM. Phone rings. "I don't love you. I don't want to be with you. I don't want you to be my Son's Father" Ok, I'm such an emotional wreck by now that I'm not thinking rationally. I go to talk to her to find out what happened, and she desperately wants to be "friends". I go with her to pick up her child (yes, this person has a 3 year old). I'm somewhat of a pest about what happened. She says she's not sure she wants to end it for good. When I drop her off she asks if I'd like help working on my house that evening. I say "sure". Never shows. "I'm sick". (If this woman was sick every time she used that excuse, she'd be a friggin one person leper colony).

 

No significant contact for a while (keeping in mind that I see her in the gym EVERY day and she's always sweet and charming). I jokingly say "I have something to do tonight, why don't you make me dinner?". She says "ok". Well, of course by this point I know she has NO intention of bringing me dinner. I say, "ok, what time?" She says "8:00". Well, of course the time comes and goes. I call to dig at her and say "what happened?" By this time I'm at a bar having a drink and a bite. She says "Oh, I'm coming. 9:00." Ok, I say "Call me when you're on your way" b/c I'm not leaving to meet someone that isn't coming. She calls. I say ok, I'm leaving. She says "Are you with another woman?" (BTW, she asks me this nearly ANY time I'm away from her and talk to her.) I say no. She comes over. Watches a Soap. I put my head in her lap. She strokes my hair. She leaves after her soap.

 

Next week is her B-day. I say "lets go out to dinner on Friday for your birthday". Now, at this point, I know I'm sounding pathetic, but I'm really low on myself by now. Oh, and you have to admit it's actually pretty damn funny and will be to me when I can look back on it without feeling like a victim.

 

She comes over Friday, 2 hrs. late. Now, she just wants to sit and watch her soap. No dinner. I'm pissed. I go out back to play with my dog. She comes running out the back door. "I have to go pick up my Son, but I'm coming back to spend the night!" Guess what, she doesn't come back. SHOCKING! Friday night RUINED!

 

I have lunch with her next day. "What happened?". "Oh, my Son fell asleep"; "Why didn't you call?"; "My cell was in the car". Pig. Broken up.

 

Week passes.

 

Gym. Lift with her. She asks if I'd like to get back together. I say "no". "I want you to be committed and know that I COULD be a good Father to your Son." She is OBSESSED with the idea that I don't like kids because I had the audacity to teach her Son to say "Please" and "Thank You".

 

She does not call. Go to her house the next morn. She informs me that she's with another man. I go nuts. She WILL NOT talk to me. Says she's coming by my house in an hour. I wait. She doesn't show. Tells me there was no man in her house, but since I'm always asking if there is, she decided to tell me there was to get me to leave her alone. Great strategy. Broken up.

 

Don't see her for a while. Friday before Easter. I see her at lunch. Bring her and her co-workers an Easter Lilly and Easter baskets for their children. I say to her "I'm glad you're my friend, but you're a friend only." She's visibly upset and says she wants more. I say "What do you want???"; "I want us to be together" Idiot GB says "ok". She says "What are you doing for Easter"; "Nothing special, would you like to come over for dinner" (She was not going to a family members, so I thought it would be nice to ask). She says "GREAT!"

 

See her the next day. She is AS COLD AS ICE. She's dressed like a slut and says she's going to a "family party with her Sister". She has her belly button pierced at this point, and informs me that she's going to get a tattoo on the small of her back and a breast augmentation to look like her OTHER Sister (Whom she's obviously insecurely obsessed with). She asks me to come with her to get something to eat. I do. She WILL NOT talk to me. Insists the party is "family only" and I am not welcome. Remember, we're together again at this point. She asks me to take her cousin back to his car (clearly the ONLY reason I was invited to dinner.) Oh, I later found out she went to a singles club.

 

I go to her house the next day (Easter). She's sleeping on the couch. She's bought a new puppy and is very proud, but does not stir from the sofa to get up. She says "I'm sleeping now. I'll come over later." I say "are you SURE???"; "Yes".

 

Well, remarkably enough, she does. I am cooking a whole chicken, vegetables, potatoes; a nice feast. I go out front to play soccer with her Son. She is despondent. 20 min. after arriving she says "I have to take the puppy to my Sister's house. Call me when dinner is ready." I'm thinking "Ok, rude beyond belief, but the kids scared of the dog, so I understand." SHE NEVER COMES BACK! I eat Easter dinner alone. She will not answer her phone.

 

NC. 1.5 weeks.

 

Run in to her at the gym. Ask her if there is any hope of reconciliation. She WILL NOT even acknowledge anything I say. Finally, she says "We will never be anything more than friends. NEVER!". I say "Ok, E. I will always love you. When I say it, I mean it". I leave. Call her briefly to say that I'm sorry, and that I hope we can be friends in time. She's very receptive. Find out later that evening that she's dating ANOTHER man. Classy.

 

NC. End of story. I am done, finished. Anyone who can put up with that can have her. BTW, in defense of myself, I am not stupid, I am not desperate, I am not ugly. I really loved her and she played me for a fool. Obviously, I was ok on the back burner until she found what she wanted. Always reeled in just enough and let out the line just enough. Most shocking is the battery of lies and deceit which I only learn about much later. Oh well, I'm recovering.

 

Sorry for the long post, but obviously, this is the SHORT version. Hope you enjoyed this pathetic story of love and abuse. I am an utter wreck right now, but I WILL come out of this a stronger person. I have never felt so stupid, used, and abused in my whole life.

 

Oh, and at this point, I'm sure you're looking for reference points. She's 28, I'm 39 so we are NOT children. Oh, and she's raising a child who has now been exposed to her sleeping with 3 men in 3 months but I'm not good enough to be his Father. Hmmm.

 

BTW, this story is frameable, wall mountable, and fun for kids.

 

Best,

 

GB

[Pantero]

GEE BEE!!!!! OH MY F-CKING GOD, BRO!!!

 

I'm glad you're doing the stonewalling NC now. I was seriously getting p.o.'d reading through this. Not at you, but just the games and the drama...I mean what the hell is going on with her?!?

 

This reminds me of what a buddy of mine went through. His exact words after he broke it off for good: "it's like she had me under a spell of some sort!"

[batesal]

I agree.. What is sad is that she never got the understanding that no matter what she had put you through, you just wanted her to be there for you and be "HER", she is 28 with a 3 year old kid. That is bad that she is teaching him all this horrible stuff to do.

 

 

GB, I bet one day down the line, she will call you begging to come back, and I hope you tell her that you gave her all you had, and now you have no more to give, and that's all. SHE horribly did you wrong with the NO shows, NO anwsers, NO nothing. What a B**ch. Sorry Man

[silentcharon]

Oh, gosh.

 

That's a terrible tale.

 

You gave so much, you kept giving and got nothing in return. I'm glad you were able to break this cycle, you truly are a strong person.

[shelters]

Wow, but she seems like such a catch? (detect sarcasm)

 

[been7077]

Pantero's point about a "spell" is well taken. Sometimes I believe whether it's the stars, the time of life, the tides, the voodoo being done on some small island with your doll or whatever, it does happen. Then we wake up and say,

"What the hell?" and breathe a sigh. Better to be alone then a player in that type of drama.