ChampionSound Posted May 11, 2006 Posted May 11, 2006 I feel like I lose a lot of opportunities with women because I delay making a move. And often by the time I come around, they have moved on. A few weeks ago I met a girl in a bar, and she told me directly: 'you have to be more aggressive. I want to know that you want me.' I understand that, but it doesn't seem to come naturally to me. For example, I get the *most amazing* hugs from a girl at work. A while ago, she told me she wants to take dance classes. This is one of my interests too, so I said 'why don't you give me your number, and I'll call you about it'. I didn't end up calling her (even though I wanted to) , but we still talk once a week during shift change. I got a second chance with her last week. We left our staff party at the same time and ended up sitting together on the sidewalk outside a corner store. I kissed her a few times, and it felt good. The next time I saw her at work, we laughed about the staff party, and as usual I got a nice big hug before I left. But I think we both kind of acted as though the kissing thing didn't happen. Here's my problem: I don't want to lose her interest by delaying asking her out. I didn't ask her last time I saw her at work, and I won't see her again until next week. Also I have lost her phone number which she gave me before. I feel like maybe I'm not being direct enough with her. It is like I put up roadblocks to stop myself from getting what I want. Is it ok to go to her a few *weeks* after all this has happened and say 'listen, I really like your hugs... do you want to get together sometime?'
Author ChampionSound Posted May 11, 2006 Author Posted May 11, 2006 *bump* words of advice, anybody?!!
MadDog Posted May 11, 2006 Posted May 11, 2006 Is it ok to go to her a few *weeks* after all this has happened and say 'listen, I really like your hugs... do you want to get together sometime?' That's a fine approach I guess...if you want her to think you play for the other team. Dude, you've gotta start acting like more of a man. Real men make things happen, it's that simple. Next time you see her, just straight up tell her, "You have any plans on Friday? I want to take you out to dinner." Simple, to the point, very manly. Don't mention anything about hugs--that is very unmanly.
Noos Posted May 13, 2006 Posted May 13, 2006 Good advice MD. The less ambiguous the better. Here's a girl's perspective: If I were this girl though, I'd think that your interaction with me indicates that you're just toying with me for the sake of your ego and that you're not really interested. The dance class thing (not calling) came across as a sign that you're not really keen and you are just playing with her emotions for your own amusement. She pretended the kissing thing didn't happen because you didn't mention it or try to kiss her again. She thinks that you wish it hadn't happened. She's giving you every chance and you keep backing off. You'd better make your move pronto. She couldn't be any clearer about liking you. And what are you doing? You're doing the "use the nice girl to boost my ego" shuffle and then bailing out at every opportunity. If you don't act now - she'll think you're insincere and just using her until someone better comes along. CLEAR ENOUGH FOR YOU TIGER????
tanbark813 Posted May 13, 2006 Posted May 13, 2006 One problem is that you're looking at things like the girl is giving you a chance and you somehow have to win them over. You should think of it as YOU giving THEM the chance to get to know you. The next time you see the girl at work, just assume that she likes you and ask her out. And definitely don't say, "I really like your hugs".
bumbaclot Posted May 14, 2006 Posted May 14, 2006 And definitely don't say, "I really like your hugs". But you can tell her that you like it when her nipples rub against you bohahaha
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