radiation7740 Posted May 6, 2006 Posted May 6, 2006 I wanted to reply on this thread but the admins closed it after 60 days. So I thought I would post the link here and you all can respond here. I'm a firm believer in no contact if you have already pursued and your ex knows how you feel about them. http://www.loveshack.org/forums/t42613/ If the dumper has contacted you at least 3 times since the break up then maybe reduced contact would be fine. Reduced contact means you call the dumper once for every 3 times they call you. That is if you are still looking for a 2nd chance and not ready to move on. If your goal is to move on then stick to no contact.
daphne Posted May 6, 2006 Posted May 6, 2006 thanks man. reinforced my no contact even though ex is contacting me. definitely not ready.
riobikini Posted May 6, 2006 Posted May 6, 2006 re: Radiation: " If your goal is to move on then stick to no contact." "Ditto!" The circumstances are important, -they're *individual* and *exclusive* to every breakup, in the details- and they should be what *determined* your decision of whether to use 'NC' or not, in the first place. It is most effective for those who are serious about *recovery* in the aftermath of breakup. The theoretical philosophy of 'NC' , in it's undiluted form, at it's rigid core, is something you do because you have to, -for any/all of the following: your own mental, emotional, and physically-related well-being. It is not a 'game-piece' to be used in manipulative acts and behavior concerned with jealousy, casually getting someones attention, or deliberately sparking hope to engineer a deliberate crash of emotions in another, or similar ruthless, uncaring, and immature acts. *It is a serious and effective tool to protect yourself*, and -if the full dose is to be taken- should be used by those who have given it great consideration, have wholly committed to it, and are totally serious about one goal: moving on. 'NC' is about respect (self-respect), self-protection, and emotional/mental/physical recovery from a relationship that cannot continue in its present state -and shows no signs of improving- and has consistently intolerable, unchanging, or threatening/debilitating circumstances. -Rio
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