confused _one Posted May 6, 2006 Posted May 6, 2006 Well its been nearly 2 years with my boyfriend and well things have been going so wrong lately ive cried and been hurt so many times emotionally. My boyfriend has pictures of other women his msn friends and it turns him on he likes getting nude pictures of these girls online. He doesnt care how I feel about it he considers it his buisness not mine. Am i being unreasonably to want him to choose or leave the relationship because he doesnt care how i feel about it. urgent
Curmudgeon Posted May 6, 2006 Posted May 6, 2006 If he doesn't care about your feelings then there isn't much of a relationship there to begin with. It sounds as if he's very selfish, taking you for granted and not showing you love and consideration.
Author confused _one Posted May 6, 2006 Author Posted May 6, 2006 I talked to him and told him how bad it hurt me and I got this I care about your feelings but I also realize that I can't change who I am to accomodate how you decide to feel so if you have a problem with some juvenille little thing you're going to have to learn to not let it bother you I can only do what I can do your feelings don't control me you control your feelings. Maby does he have feelings for her and is telling me he doesnt want to give it up to save our relationship and stop me from leaving
Author confused _one Posted May 6, 2006 Author Posted May 6, 2006 Do you think he will choose between me and her
tikigods Posted May 6, 2006 Posted May 6, 2006 Why would you want to be with someone like that anyway? Let him have the other girl, he doesn't care about you, in fact he has all but flat out told you that, why would you want to be with someone that doesn't want to be with you?
Curmudgeon Posted May 6, 2006 Posted May 6, 2006 I care about your feelings but I also realize that I can't change who I am to accomodate how you decide to feel TRANSLATION: I don't care enough to sacrifice or give up what I want merely for you. Live with it! so if you have a problem with some juvenille little thing you're going to have to learn to not let it bother you TRANSLATION: I take njo responsibility for how you're feeling because of my actions and neglect. It's all your fault that you feel badly and unloved, unappreciated. It's not my fault at all. I can only do what I can do TRANSLATION: I'm unwilling to put any effort into our relationship, and especially not for you. your feelings don't control me, you control your feelings. TRANSLATION: See? I told you it was all your fault. Get over yourself. Maby does he have feelings for her and is telling me he doesnt want to give it up to save our relationship and stop me from leaving TRANSLATION: I think you have that right!
Conqueror224 Posted May 7, 2006 Posted May 7, 2006 dump him! if he's even thinking about choosing someone else over you and he acts like you're arent anything special to him then he's not worth it. there's no reason to keep him around because he's just being a selfish jerk. dumping him is definitly the best thing to do. dont even regret it if you do dump him
Adunaphel Posted May 7, 2006 Posted May 7, 2006 Dump him. You have been together for two years, so you might be thinking "is it worth to leave him just for "some juvenile little thing" (as he puts it)"? Yes, it's worth it. I dumped my ex boyfriend for similar reasons. You feel bad for a while. Expecially if you BF will decide that it's *your*fault if you dump him "over some little meaningless thing, not because of real problems"). Expecially if your bf will not put much effort in trying to get you back. But you'll soon feel *much*better. The sooner you get out of a relationship where things have got to this point, the better for you, your self esxteem, and the more time you do not waste.
EndoftheRope Posted May 7, 2006 Posted May 7, 2006 Curmudgeon has translated your boyfriend's comments perfectly. Dump him. Unless you want to marry him and spend the next 40- 60 years with a guy who does whatever he wants, no matter how hurtful, and gives you psychobabble about how it's YOUR responsibility if you actually FEEL hurt by inherently hurtful behaviors.
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