2020vision Posted May 5, 2006 Posted May 5, 2006 I can honestly say that I hate my ex boyfriend. Last night I get a call from a random number and its him. He proceeds to tell me that his new gf just left him because she found emails that he had sent me just two weekends ago confessing his undying love to me and telling me he needs to see me. I guess she was away, and he decided that he wanted to play! Anyways, he asked me if I had anything to do with it. He also kept saying he doesn't know what he is going to do because now he can't afford the rent without her and how hes going to have to move into his parents house. Why would he be telling me this stuff???!! I cannot help but laugh when I think about how much Karma is a bitch...Although, I am kind of upset because he actually called me with this, it hurts to think that this is what we have come to. He is such a POS. But I guess I should be happy because I have heard such juicy information that makes him look like an idiot. What should make of all this? If anything at all...
Dagny Posted May 5, 2006 Posted May 5, 2006 You should think nothing of it. His new gf was actually a smart cookie who did the right thing, she saw him trying to sample too many new pies and ditched him. You should be a smart cookie too, this guy is grasping at whatever strings he has left. Good luck
Author 2020vision Posted May 5, 2006 Author Posted May 5, 2006 this guy is grasping at whatever strings he has left That is the perfect way to put it. Now that I am over the initial shock of the conversation, I am realizing that I just don't care. He dug his grave, now he can jump in!!
KittenMoon Posted May 5, 2006 Posted May 5, 2006 I think you should be relishing in the fact she left him. Crack open a bottle and take a bubble bath and laugh! Hah!
CaliGuy Posted May 5, 2006 Posted May 5, 2006 That is the perfect way to put it. Now that I am over the initial shock of the conversation, I am realizing that I just don't care. He dug his grave, now he can jump in!! 2020, remember one thing please. "Never believe what someone tells you. Believe what they show you." I know you feel this way now but when you have one of those down moments you might be tempted to let him back in. Before you do that, observe his actions, not his words. Words are meaningless when they do not coincide with actions. Best of luck.
Zeppelin456 Posted May 5, 2006 Posted May 5, 2006 Jeez does she have to be so cruel? I agree, definitely keep him out of your life. But you don't have to celebrate it.
Author 2020vision Posted May 5, 2006 Author Posted May 5, 2006 Thanks for all the advice...I have my evil moments where I want to celebrate it...lol But, overall I am realizing that by even talking to him I am forced to deal with this drama that he dishes out. And the reality is, they will get back together and he will not be calling me. I am getting so sick of dealing with his problems, only to have the same result everytime:we do not get back together, and frankly that is a good thing. So I ask myself, what is the point talking to him?? I have been in denial that I do not want to speak with him, and then when he does call it catches me so off guard that I keep talking to him. The only solution I have at this point, is to change my number. Is this too drastic??
silentcharon Posted May 5, 2006 Posted May 5, 2006 No, it isn't too drastic to change your number. He might get the hint that you're not interested in dealing with his bs.
Author 2020vision Posted May 5, 2006 Author Posted May 5, 2006 Well, after a lot of debating, I changed my number. I refuse to have him a part of my life anymore and am tired of making excuses as to why I answer his phone calls and actually talk to him. I am tired of the drama and feel I have dissolved it. While changing my number does not change my feelings for him, it does give me a step in the right direction to finally get over this back and forth battle that I have been dealing with. It just gets really old dealing with him, and I have finally put a stop to it. I would highly reccommend changing your number if you are in the same situation, where the ex won't leave you alone. Best, 2020
Chinook Posted May 6, 2006 Posted May 6, 2006 I would highly reccommend changing your number if you are in the same situation, where the ex won't leave you alone. I kinda went one further than that. I didn't bother to replace my phone when I dropped it and broke it. Now I have no cell phone and my landline is unlisted anyways! Phone freedom is pretty good. My ex once commented that he only uses his phone to send and receive text messages with me. I don't think so buster.
Author 2020vision Posted May 6, 2006 Author Posted May 6, 2006 *sigh* I am beginning to think there is no end to this. Its been 6 months and he is still dragging this out. I came home from work yesterday to find my ex sitting in my parking lot below my apartment. My heart sunk, he saw my new car and is convinced that I have a "sugar daddy" to pay for it. But I guess thats just besides the point... I can't stand this any longer. He says he came by because he couldn't call me and I told him I changed my number. And he was shocked said it was too drastic. whatever, I think showing up at my place is whats drastic. I asked him his point, and he said that he just wanted to know what was going on with my phone and now he found he so he wanted to go. Something came over me, and I didn't want him to go so I kept talking to him about meaningless stuff. Then, I realize that he has a gf still...So I ask him, did you work things out with her or what?? And he says shes still gone and yet he told her some excuse that it was joke that he was emailng me....yeah who is going to believe that?? Anyways, I ask him "Do you love her?" and he says "I like her.." and he tells me he likes living with her because its like living with your best friend and she lets him party whenever he wants..omg, I could not even believe the conversation I was having. Then the next thing I know, he grabs me and starts kissing me. I then got into my car and drove away. Ugh, I hate this, he is so cruel. After I left, I just broke down. He has absolutley no feelings for me, it has been proven by how inconsiderate he is. Any suggestions for the next time he does this? I guess I could call the police, but that does seem a little extreme because I am not being physically hurt and theres no way to stop hm from breaking my heart. This just really sucks.
Chinook Posted May 6, 2006 Posted May 6, 2006 Any suggestions for the next time he does this? I guess I could call the police, but that does seem a little extreme because I am not being physically hurt and theres no way to stop hm from breaking my heart. This just really sucks. Yes. It's time to set the boundaries. You need to tell him exactly what is expected of him and what is not. He will NOT contact you and what that means. If he then violates those boundaries then it's up to you but you have a reason to call the police. You have asked him to leave you alone. It's not YOUR fault HE can't get YOU out if his system..!!
Author 2020vision Posted May 6, 2006 Author Posted May 6, 2006 Thanks for the advice. I just don't know why he insists on dragging this out. It is getting old and to the point of being ridiculous. Why does he come over and want to see me and kiss me if he doesn't want to be with me??? What is up with that? It just confuses me, and it ends up hurting me. No matter how much I tell myself that he doesn't want me back, when he says things like he does and when he shows up at my place, I just can't help but hold on to hope that I shouldn't in the first place!
trone Posted May 6, 2006 Posted May 6, 2006 2020, Although I truly understand where you are coming from, I think you cant only blame your ex for the last incidence. You could have easly asked him to leave but you rather kinda wanted him to stay to hear what you wanted to hear. I broke up with my ex 8 months ago, neither her nor I are dating. When we broke up, she told me that she can not see me for a very long time and would not reply to any kind of communication from me to heal. Basically she initiated NC. Months passed, now I am moving to overseas for my job and I wanted to be able to say bye to her and sent a nice text message. Still no reply. I think it is cruel and not mature bec I will prob not even see her again in my lifetime but in a way she is doing what she needs to and not letting me to even talk to her. She is protecting her wounds, I guess. She may have totally different reasons and I do not agree with any of those. Even our friends think that she could be able to say at least bye before I leave to millions miles away especially after everything that I did for her. But in a way I understand her, she is doing what she thinks is right. If you want to stay away from him, you can. Just let him know. Each time you talk to him, ask questions, he is getting more closer to you. Tell him that you are not going to cut with all the communication with him. If he is a normal guy, he will understand and stay away.
Author 2020vision Posted May 6, 2006 Author Posted May 6, 2006 Thanks for the advice. I do agree that its not all his fault. I should have not asked him questions and kept up a conversation with him. It is just hard, because a part of me really wants to talk to him and its so hard when he is right in front of me. Unfortunatley I am not dealing with a normal guy, he is just starved for attention from anywhere he can get it. (In this case, showing up at my place) I believe I will definetley get over this incident, and hopefully he got the point. 8 months of NC....well, I can say that she has probably just completley moved on. I agree it is immature that she cannot even say goodbye. But, you cannot control her actions so you just have no choice but to accept it like you are.
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