Owl Posted May 5, 2006 Posted May 5, 2006 Wow...the "love" is flowing today! LOL Can't we all just get along? How about we turn this back along the lines of the original thread here... to the OW/OM here... ...do YOU feel that it's possible to really go back to a 'friends only' relationship after the affair? I know how (us) BS's feel on the subject.... ...and bluntly, the MM/MW don't have a clue what they feel on the subject most times, other than wanting to maintain relations with both OP and BS... ...so what's YOUR thoughts? Do you feel that its possible to drop the relationship back from 'in love' to 'just friends' with no risk of it resuming?
zarathustra Posted May 5, 2006 Posted May 5, 2006 I post on this forum because I try to help OW ... much as they seem to be a bunch of self-destructive women... I do try to help, because I know I've been there before. I don't see that I'm included in their chummy little group... um.. yeah I know I'm not. Wasn't included on any recent rounds of 'us'. I don't care... I am here to chat or whatever. Sami, you know I think you're one of the most brilliant and strong women around... you've been there for me when I didn't think anyone would understand my situation. So I definitely think you are my chum!
Sami_D Posted May 5, 2006 Posted May 5, 2006 Errr... Owl... I don't have a problem with anyone who wants to come to OM/OW forum and offer help and advice to us. Anyone else can take a long walk off a short pier. There are NOT many places for us to talk... endless places they can find help. And yes, I am adamant, because this place has been my only place of sense for the past 9 or so months. Anyone using the word 'slut' can go to hell, in my book.
Teag Posted May 5, 2006 Posted May 5, 2006 In light of the fact that Ross posted this same thread on the Infidelity forum (I think he's looking for answers from both sides), I think that Teag's response may have been better received if it was posted there given her view is the W's point of view. So in that sense, I do agree with Sami that this is the OW's forum and these posts are obviously upsetting some who are here in need of support and treats this forum as their 'safe place'. I'm not sure about other people on here but I click on the top of the screen that says New Post, I don't normally pay attention to what forum there in & I don't go into th OW forum looking to criticize OW. I guess I will for now on. And for the others who took offense if you really research some of my older post I've posted to OW trying to give them support & letting them know they desearved more than that they desearve to be treated as good as anyone else & to have someone that will give their all to only them. Yes, you're right. I don't need to hear about some uptight, money-grabbing biatch Sure she's a nice wife... sure she is... Um I know your not calling me that, you don't know me just like I don't know you. I didn't come here attacking ANYONE. not you or anyone else so get a life. I haven't read any of your post but I think I'm going to, maybe then I'll understand why you took SO much offense to something that has nothing to do with you. But anyway, I hope you get over whatever is making you so miserable, and you get what you want out of life. And unlike you I say that in sincerity and not being a smarta**. I'm done posting byyyyeeeeee
Sami_D Posted May 5, 2006 Posted May 5, 2006 Sami, you know I think you're one of the most brilliant and strong women around... you've been there for me when I didn't think anyone would understand my situation. So I definitely think you are my chum! Thanks Zaza... even thought I have wanted to tear off your tail and whip your arse with it today FFS!... HOW could you..? grrrrr... but.. I KNOW... I have been there. I have texted him when I felt low... yes... I know.
zarathustra Posted May 5, 2006 Posted May 5, 2006 Thanks Zaza... even thought I have wanted to tear off your tail and whip your arse with it today FFS!... HOW could you..? grrrrr... but.. I KNOW... I have been there. I have texted him when I felt low... yes... I know. Hugs to you Sami... you know I think the world of you. Oooh... whip my arse, eh? hmmm... It sounds exciting.
Sami_D Posted May 5, 2006 Posted May 5, 2006 I'm not sure about other people on here but I click on the top of the screen that says New Post, I don't normally pay attention to what forum there in & I don't go into th OW forum looking to criticize OW. I guess I will for now on. And for the others who took offense if you really research some of my older post I've posted to OW trying to give them support & letting them know they desearved more than that they desearve to be treated as good as anyone else & to have someone that will give their all to only them. = No, I don't do that, I stick to OW forum, because we're talked about like s***e on the rest of the site. But I understand you getting dragged into this unwittingly and letting your 'slut' comment fly about. I don't think I'll research some of your older posts. An established OW poster defended you and that's ok for me. Just... try to remember where your're posting. We OW ARE always going through s***. Always. Try to remember that. NP. Sorry for the angst.
Sami_D Posted May 5, 2006 Posted May 5, 2006 Oooh... whip my arse, eh? hmmm... It sounds exciting. Don't tempt me
zarathustra Posted May 5, 2006 Posted May 5, 2006 Um I know your not calling me that, you don't know me just like I don't know you. I didn't come here attacking ANYONE. not you or anyone else so get a life. I haven't read any of your post but I think I'm going to, maybe then I'll understand why you took SO much offense to something that has nothing to do with you. But anyway, I hope you get over whatever is making you so miserable, and you get what you want out of life. And unlike you I say that in sincerity and not being a smarta**. I'm done posting byyyyeeeeee Teag, I understand that it wasn't your intention, but unfortunately even though your intentions were good, you did hurt some people's feelings. Even though you say your post has nothing to do with us, the term us used to described the OW that affected your life (and your anger is justified, so please don't misread it), is offensive to many on the OW forum. You remember the saying... a rose by any other name is still a rose... Sami is not miserable... She's a strong, determine and uplifting woman who is doing the right thing for herself, admist her pain. She has been a pillar of strength for many of us on the OW forum.
RealityCheck Posted May 5, 2006 Posted May 5, 2006 Zara..... I'll drink to that! Sami and all the OW on this Forum have been a pillar of strength!!! *clink* To US "OW"'s....... *Hey Sami!!! your supposed to share that bottle*......lol
zarathustra Posted May 5, 2006 Posted May 5, 2006 Zara..... I'll drink to that! Sami and all the OW on this Forum have been a pillar of strength!!! *clink* To US "OW"'s....... *Hey Sami!!! your supposed to share that bottle*......lol I'll drink many drinks tonight with y'all.
RealityCheck Posted May 5, 2006 Posted May 5, 2006 That's on my Agenda for the evening!! Going out with 12 girlfriends. We've been friends since grade 1. "The Sisterhood" Wish you could come along!! Man! we would have some fun!!
zarathustra Posted May 5, 2006 Posted May 5, 2006 That's on my Agenda for the evening!! Going out with 12 girlfriends. We've been friends since grade 1. "The Sisterhood" Wish you could come along!! Man! we would have some fun!! It would be fun!!! I'm a cheap drunk.
Sami_D Posted May 5, 2006 Posted May 5, 2006 Sorry for hogging... was my intention on our 'moving on' thread... Share this wine..? Eh...? ah ok... mine all mine... heh heh heh heh
RealityCheck Posted May 5, 2006 Posted May 5, 2006 Zara..... Sami..... It's been an awesome day with you both!!! *Big Hugs* Heck! I was so engrossed here today, I haven't even eaten lunch! I guess I'll be a cheap drunk tonight as well! *laughing*
Sami_D Posted May 5, 2006 Posted May 5, 2006 goddamit its 9.15pm here... the wine is open...get over to our thread..!!
RealityCheck Posted May 5, 2006 Posted May 5, 2006 *laughing* Sami.... it's only 3:20 here. However, if you ever have another shyt day, look me up because you certainly put a sparkle in my day today! You had me in stitches!! *now pass the wine*
Sami_D Posted May 5, 2006 Posted May 5, 2006 If I ever..? errr... I believe I will have several. Not to say endless. But feckit I will not give in to him.
target-d Posted May 5, 2006 Posted May 5, 2006 If I ever..? errr... I believe I will have several. Not to say endless. But feckit I will not give in to him. You will have several, but no matter which way the mop flops, they will not be endless. You will someday (believe it or not) look back on this time in your life and not believe how you could have felt this way. Wishing you happiness.
target-d Posted May 5, 2006 Posted May 5, 2006 Oh yeah - in answer to the actual thread. No, in my opinion, you cannot just be friends. It's almost impossible for any former lovers to be friends, but an affair situation puts an additional person(s) in the mix, making it totally impossible.
Sami_D Posted May 5, 2006 Posted May 5, 2006 You will have several, but no matter which way the mop flops, they will not be endless. You will someday (believe it or not) look back on this time in your life and not believe how you could have felt this way. Wishing you happiness. UM. I ended it over a week ago. Not kept up? But thanks for your up to date comments.
target-d Posted May 5, 2006 Posted May 5, 2006 UM. I ended it over a week ago. Not kept up? But thanks for your up to date comments. yup, I knew you'd ended things, but still have hope. I just meant that whether or not your hopes are met, you'll still be OK.
Author rossm Posted May 5, 2006 Author Posted May 5, 2006 Um. Holy crap. what happened here while I was away?!? Oh, b/t/w, whats a BS?
whichwayisup Posted May 5, 2006 Posted May 5, 2006 Well, I guess your first mistake was referring to the OW as a "slut". I think teag meant the OW through experience, not about anybody here. That is how I read it anyway. Um. Holy crap. what happened here while I was away?!? Your thread got stolen (offtopic from the original reason of you posting). How are you now? Where are your thoughts about this weekend? Hopefully you'll be spending time with your wife and not consumed about the MW.
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