iminbadshape Posted May 4, 2006 Posted May 4, 2006 I did it! I had an affair! I was wrong! It was wrong! We were wrong! I had an affair for a year. The other person left their spouse with promises of me doing the same. I didn't. The problem we fell in love. We fell in such big love. I am so upset I am not sure if it is because I feel rejected for the reason that the person found another. Not just another, but a person that I know. Now I am not friends with this person but they work with my spouse and my spouse tells me everything that is going on in the new relationship. Now I know this is ALL TOGETHER WRONG! I told my spouse I came clean. We are separating. It is the smart thing to do. We are doing it amicably. The other issue was too little to late for the one I want to end up with. They are now in a rebound relationship and have taken every step to take themselves far away from me. I know they love me and are still in love with me. How do I know this? They told me last time we talked (3 days ago) when I had a weak moment and called. But you know what? That night they were with their new rebound, sleeping over. How can they be over me so fast? How can they just turn that love off? What do I do? I am mess it is affecting my job, my day, I am sad all the time. It has been a week since the break up Do I give them their space? Or do I go see them. My friends say to give space and they will come back. There really wasn't any closure but I know they were in pain over the fact I did not leave my marriage. I want to see them to tell them how much I hurt and love them. When I did not leave my spouse I was told there is no snese in staying in our affair because the vision of us is impossible. And guess what? The new rebound person can offer so much more than me. I miss that person so much. My heart hurts so bad. I feel like a zombie. Do you think they will ever contact me. We will be in social circles soon and I don;t know what to do. Do you think they hurt still or have been hurting for a long time and have gotten over it? Please help I am so upset
RealityCheck Posted May 5, 2006 Posted May 5, 2006 Oh My!!! Geez.... my heart goes out to you! As much as I don't want to say...."what a mess"! I can see why you are hurting without a doubt! All I can offer, is try to get control of one situation at a time in your head. Focus on where the real problem is ie. leaving the marriage, the A, the other party involved... This could at least alliviate some of the stress. As far as the social gatherings coming up! Heck! I would look my absolute best, hold my head high and put on my best acting persona of a life time. Good luck and keep us posted.
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