Guest Posted May 3, 2006 Posted May 3, 2006 I think my wife has feelings for another man Last weekend we both had been drinking and she ended up getting really drunk. So drunk that she doesn’t even remember the events that happened. We got home me her and our friend who had also been drinking but was to drunk to drive – he slept on the couch. My wife and I went upstairs and I was trying to get her undressed and In bed. She started freaking out kicking at me and whipping at me with her braw. It was like she didn’t know who I was and that I was trying to rape her or something. It was so scary – It was like it wasn’t even my wife. Anyway I started to loose my patients and started to get mad at her. Then we started arguing about stupid stuff. Then she wanted to go downstairs and hang out with buddy. I wasn’t about to let that happen so I was like no why do want to go hang out with him anyway. We argued about it some more and the next words out of her mouth shocked me –she said “I have feeling for him Im tired of hiding them – I love him.” I was like what the hell. She proceeded then to tell me all the things that he has to offer that I couldn’t provide her with ie... a good job saying I don’t treat her with respect and that he would s*** like that. I was getting madder and madder and she was just saying awful things to me. I tried to force her to bed but she was fighting me and I ended up hitting her. She was so upset she didn’t speak to me anymore that night. The fight was over or so I thought. She tried several times to sneak down stairs to see her friend. After the first time I hid her clothes so she wouldn’t leave. She tried again - Remember she has no clothes on so now she was trying to leave the room naked. I asked her where she was going and she said she wanted to go downstairs to lay with her friend that he would never of hit her and that he would protect her. I put her back in bed and that was it for the night. When we awoke in the morning she was very upset – her eye was badly brusied and swollen. She asked me why did you hit me so I told her that she had confessed to being in love with her friend. She was dumbfounded that she would of said such things and insured me that this isn’t the case and doesn’t know why she would of said such things. Only that maybe she said them because she was trying to hurt him because they were fighting. I asked her why would she want to go downstairs to him. She said that maybe because I had hit her and that she needed a friend. What do you think
TheOrb87 Posted May 6, 2006 Posted May 6, 2006 this is a tough one. when she sobered up she said that she wanted to see her friend because you hit her, but she started saying nasty things to you before you hit her, so her argument has little merit. in my experience with alcohol, it can make people very talkative and admit truths and feelings that people would not admit sober. however she might have been trying to make you angry for some reason. why she would do this, i cannot say. you have to ask yourself that question, or ask your wife. either way this situation seems fishy. whatever the case the only thing i can say for certain is that you cannot let her drink that much again. alcohol is a poison; drink too much and nothing good can come of it.
luvtoto Posted May 6, 2006 Posted May 6, 2006 You gave her a black eye?! Hope she gives you a divorce.
stillhere Posted May 6, 2006 Posted May 6, 2006 my exH was just like you, except the hitting part. I saw him in every one of your words but that part. If he would have ever hit me, I can guarantee you he would not be alive, or not functioning properly because he'd still be in the hospital !!!!!!
stillafool Posted May 6, 2006 Posted May 6, 2006 How hard did you hit her for her eye to be blue and swollen???? My gawd, you must have been as out of control as your wife. As far as your wife is concerned I think the alchohol lowered her inhibitions and she told you how she felt. I think the reason she got so drunk in the first place was because this guy was there and she wanted him and the only way to deal with the pain was to try to drown it in alcohol. Why didn't you go downstairs and confront the buddy about it in a calm manner? I would have asked him if anything was going on between them. I also would have told him we were having an issue and ask him to leave my home. I definitely think you two need counseling. Drunkeness and physical violence are a sure sign your marriage is in trouble.
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