cupidette Posted May 2, 2006 Posted May 2, 2006 I really need some advice, there is a guy that I am interested in, but I would like to know if he is interested in me first. He is a customer at the grocery store where I work. He always seems to end up in my check out line. He seems polite, but he never says anything other than "how are you?" and things like that. Even when there is a moment of silence, while I am ringing up his groceries, he doesn't really say anything. Sometimes I feel like he wants to, but he doesn't. He does give me a vibe, but I can't put it into words, it is just this feelig I get when he is around. He did notice that I had changed my hair and when I walked by him while he was shopping he said that he liked my hair. I was so shocked, because I think that was the first time he actually said something to me out of ordinary. However, I stood there for a bit and he didn't say anything else. I was polite though and I thanked him for the compliment. Last night he was going to check out with his groceries and he clearly saw that my lane was closed (it had a big CLOSED sign on it). He said "oh, your closed". I said "yes", but isn't there a lane over there that is open. He was like, "yeah, you know, uh, I will go over there". I wasn't supposed to sign back on because I was already signed out of that register for the night. I said "wait, I will ring you up". He then wheeled his cart back into my lane and started unloading his groceries. For the first time ever, he called me by name. He had asked me my name before, but never used it. He was like, "How are you tonight (my name)?". I am very shy, so I just said, "fine". I don't know if this stuff means anything, but it sure seems like it to me. I know people have said that vibes I pick up from this guy may be wishful thinking, but it doesn't seem like that to me. However, I do like the guy so I can understand how I would want to perceive them as that. I just can't ask him out, I just can't do it. What I want to know is this, does it sound like he likes me? What should I do to encourage him to ask me out?
MadDog Posted May 2, 2006 Posted May 2, 2006 Wow. When two people are this shy, it makes we wonder if they ever have a chance of getting together. Next time you could just ask him what his plans are for the evening. If he has any social skills, even if he's not asking you out, he'll reciprocate and ask you what your plans are. Just tell him You don't have any plans, will probably just watch TV (or something else equally boring.) If he doesn't get the hint to ask you out then, he's a lost cause. As the saying goes, you can lead a horse to water but you can't make him drink.
Author cupidette Posted May 2, 2006 Author Posted May 2, 2006 Can someone tell me if it sounds like this guy likes me? I mean, how can I tell if he likes me or if he is just being nice?
miscellaneous Posted May 3, 2006 Posted May 3, 2006 This guy is clearly into you! Come on, it's so obvious. He keeps comming to your register?! He notices your hair color change! I mean, who goes to the store and notices the cashier's hair color?! Well, if u r not a middle-aged mom and the cashier is a friend. Young guys have better things to think about..UNLESS he is into you! The only problem is...he is shy..u r shy...and u guys r in a food store. That's hardly a place to get aqauinted. perhaps in this situation u have to be the aggressor..one day suprise him and say "you are always in here, what's your name?" Then smile and ask for his email address or messenger ID. That way u guys can chat and u will have the barrier of the net so u won't feel so shy.
phyrespryte Posted May 3, 2006 Posted May 3, 2006 Can someone tell me if it sounds like this guy likes me? I mean, how can I tell if he likes me or if he is just being nice? He likes you or he could be a crazy stalker. I like MadDog's advice. Make it easy for him to ask you out and hopefully he'll follow through. I think he will though because he's constantly visiting you.
Author cupidette Posted May 3, 2006 Author Posted May 3, 2006 I can try and build up the courage to ask him out. The problem is when he gets near, I get nervous and when I speak, my voice is shaky and quivery. Is it ok to ask him even if there is a noticeable shaking in my voice?
MadDog Posted May 3, 2006 Posted May 3, 2006 I can try and build up the courage to ask him out. The problem is when he gets near, I get nervous and when I speak, my voice is shaky and quivery. Is it ok to ask him even if there is a noticeable shaking in my voice? Don't trip. I have that effect on girls all the time. It's no big deal.
Author cupidette Posted May 5, 2006 Author Posted May 5, 2006 I just wanted to bump this thread up to see if anyone had any other pointers?
phyrespryte Posted May 7, 2006 Posted May 7, 2006 I can try and build up the courage to ask him out. The problem is when he gets near, I get nervous and when I speak, my voice is shaky and quivery. Is it ok to ask him even if there is a noticeable shaking in my voice? Yes it is ok. He obviously likes you and he's shy too. So he's probably not going to notice that you're nervous. Or if he does notice it...it'll help him realize that you're interested.
Author cupidette Posted May 7, 2006 Author Posted May 7, 2006 I can't face this anymore. I saw him today and he didn't say one word to me. He didn't get in my line, he didn't even say hello to me. I can't deal with the emotional pain. I have decided that I don't want to give him my number. He probably wouldn't call me and it would just hurt me more.
phyrespryte Posted May 8, 2006 Posted May 8, 2006 I can't face this anymore. I saw him today and he didn't say one word to me. He didn't get in my line, he didn't even say hello to me. I can't deal with the emotional pain. I have decided that I don't want to give him my number. He probably wouldn't call me and it would just hurt me more. Pleh. So he didn't get in your line today. Not a big deal. I do hope that you're not putting all your eggs in one basket? Don't think so hard about this guy that he becomes like some sort of untouchable super human. If you run into him make a move. But I wouldn't just wait around ignoring all the other men you meet until then. If anything he might've given up hope too or the other person's line was faster or felt kind of ugly that day and he didn't want you to ring him up or blah blah blah. Doesn't really matter. So next time you see him be extra friendly and mention that you miss his visits and that maybe he could give you a call. Until then enjoy life.
Guest Posted May 8, 2006 Posted May 8, 2006 i just can't be that shy or pathetic. if i want to talk to a girl, i just talk to her. if she's interested she acts interested. if she's playing stupid games she thinks will get me chasing her, forget that.
mscmkr Posted May 9, 2006 Posted May 9, 2006 oh my god girl you are so killing me!!! yes this guy is into you. yes this guy is shy. and no theres nothing wrong with that. also, if you actually do ask him out or try to give him your number or whatever and he isn't into you. your head isn't going to explode. the sky isn't going to fall and the world will keep revolving. I PROMISE!!!!! im sure it will feel a little embarrassing if he doesn't say yes to you. but it will only hurt for a second. just like getting a shot. "just a little pinch and thats it". and with this theres not even any blood. GET A GRIP. TAKE A DEEP BREATH AND JUST SAY, "hey i see you in here allot. i think your nice. are you seeing anyone"? (and if your voice cracks while you do it thats even better. men take it as a compliment if a woman is nervous) thats it. thats all you have to do. if he is actually alive, (and im sure he is) he will give you the answer you are looking for. if he doesn't say hes seeing someone or ask you out hes not into you. PROBLEM SOLVED!!! this way you dont even have to ask him out. just a very easy question. relax hun. im sure he will say yes........mscmkr
Author cupidette Posted May 10, 2006 Author Posted May 10, 2006 Ok, I saw him again and it was the same thing. The silent treatment. He just went from constantly trying to interact with me to cold turkey over night. This is now the second time he has been in the store when I was there and not talk to me. I am not upset over this now because I know there is a reason for his behaviour. One of my coworkers who I talked to about this guy actually spoke with him a few nights earlier when I was not at work. She said he looked like he was looking for someone and she said to him are you looking for her (meaning me of course). She said he had a surprised look on his face and that he became visibly nervous and asked her why she would ask him that. They chatted for a bit and he eventually confided in her that he was interested in me. However, he made her promise not to repeat anything he said to her (which of course she did, that is how I know). She offered to pass a note to me and he said absolutely not. She said he wanted to do this himself. I guess the only thing I can do is wait for him to come out of this silent treatment mode of his. I feel so much better now that I know he is interested in me.
AriaIncognito Posted May 10, 2006 Posted May 10, 2006 Ok first of all, hello??? Who goes to the store THAT often. You had to have a clue lol. Talk to him already. So he's shy....break him out of his shell... Jennifer
phyrespryte Posted May 10, 2006 Posted May 10, 2006 Ok first of all, hello??? Who goes to the store THAT often. You had to have a clue lol. Talk to him already. So he's shy....break him out of his shell... Jennifer Seriously!! And how much easier is it now that you've got a friend who knows him?
Author cupidette Posted May 13, 2006 Author Posted May 13, 2006 Ok, he did it. He passed me his phone number that he had written down on a piece of paper
buzzie2 Posted May 13, 2006 Posted May 13, 2006 I just finished reading this whole thread and I'm shocked that he finally gave you his number! He just seemed so shy I think he was hoping that you would give out your number first. Well anyways good luck with everything! He sounds like a keeper- any guy that would come into a grocery store every day to see you must be in love!
phyrespryte Posted May 14, 2006 Posted May 14, 2006 Ok, he did it. He passed me his phone number that he had written down on a piece of paper Yay! :bunny: Soooooooo.... did you call him?
Author cupidette Posted May 14, 2006 Author Posted May 14, 2006 I think I am going to wait at least a week to call, because if I call before then, it might make me look needy.
phyrespryte Posted May 14, 2006 Posted May 14, 2006 A week!!!!! NOOOOOOOO! Maybe I'm crazy, but a week? That's so long. If it was me I'd have called that day. But I'm needy. Besides the poor guy. He'll be so anxious waiting and waiting for your call. I don't think you'll look needy for calling him in under a week. If you take a week it'll look like you're flakey or your not really that interested. How about 3 days? I see that number thrown around this forum a lot.
Guest Posted May 15, 2006 Posted May 15, 2006 I think I will go ahead and wait a week. I get so nervous just thinking about calling him. I mean he never said what time of the day to call. It doesn't even say if it is his cell phone number or his home number. I wish he would have asked for my number instead because I would rather him call me.
Author cupidette Posted May 15, 2006 Author Posted May 15, 2006 I think I am going to stick with the one week plan. I am too nervous to call him now. I don't even know what to say. It would have been a lot easier if he got my phone number instead. I never even said I would call, I just smiled and took his number. I mean I doubt he thinks I am not interested. I mean surely men know that we might wait a week to call. I mean I have heard of guys waiting a week to call. I mean, what am I supposed to do? I am going crazy over here.
AussieChick Posted May 15, 2006 Posted May 15, 2006 OMG!! CALL HIM NOW!! It's been a few days - he must be SO sure that you're not interested as you haven't called yet - Just imagine how much courage it took for him to give you his number - so USE IT! Seriously what have you got to lose - as you guys aren't friends, there's no friendship to risk. He GAVE you his number - so he's interested, YOU"RE interested - so RING ALREADY! Sorry for all the *shouting* - but man - you're killing us all.... Some of us would die to be in your position - so do something about it!!!
Author cupidette Posted May 16, 2006 Author Posted May 16, 2006 I am at work right now, do you think I can calll when I get home. It is going to be close to 11:00 PM.
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