Guest Posted May 1, 2006 Posted May 1, 2006 I have been 9 months heavily involved with a man that I met online. His profile said he was divorced but after a few amazing times together, he told me that he has been separated a little over a year and is in the process of divorce. He said he and his soon to be ex wife were emotionally divorced years ago and that he has dated several people before he met me. He says I am the love of his life and I felt the same way about him many months until recently. He has said the divorce will be over soon (within months) and it still is not over. He now says july but my patience is wearing thin. He has a 6 year old son who lives with him part time in a one bedroom apartment (they share a small bed together) while he is paying the mortgage on the place his wife lives in with his son. He also pays for all of her expenses until the divorce. His wife has been dating someone for a year now and has recently ended the relationship. Now she calls all the time. We talked about moving in together and in fact he was looking at apartments for a few months. Now he says we have all the time in the world (he has just renewed his lease on his one bedroom) He also says he wants me there to be a good role model for his child as I have good values and he always complains about how terrible of a woman his ex wife was and how he was psychologically abused. He also says he wants me to be the mother of his child some day giving his current son a sibling. However, I don’t foresee this happening as he has just renewed his lease on the one bedroom apartment which clearly means he has intentions of continuing the share his bed with his son. I do not agree with this as I feel a soon to be 7 year old boy needs his own room ..his own place to call home. Not to mention his son is constantly having nightmares. We have broken up a few times because I keep feeling that he is not really emotionally ready for me. Although his son and I get along very well,( I am very good to him) I can’t help but to feel left out many times because he is constantly affectionate with his son and giving him all of his attention all the while I just sit there watching them, . I realize that the child is going through a difficult time with his parents separated and I do my best to be loving and understanding but I just can’t help but feel that my emotional needs are not being met. He s I am constantly hurting and crying. I just had a miscarriage last week without knowing I was pregnant and he showed no signs of sensitivity to the situation. I felt sad and alone. This entire week since the miscarriage our relationship is weird. I am extremely confused and not sure whether I should stick this out or just move on. I am soon to be 34 and have had failed relationships in the past and do have a fear of losing love again. My biological clock is on alarm mode and I am beginning to feel an urgency to work towards building a family. I have constantly asked for us to spend a weekend away somewhere together so that we can nourish our relationship. He always says yes but never makes a plan, all the while he will go for a golfing weekend with his friends or take a trip with his son. He has invited me to go along with his son on a couple of occasions and I do. The vacation always ends up with them together and me watching. I just don’t know what I got myself into and not sure if I should stay or go. Help??
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