I wasn't ready to get married

[Guest]

I had been dating my boyfriend for two years when we broke up recently. He was older than me (him 30 and me 24). Things were always great between us. We never fought, we made each other laugh, we were the only people we could be 100% honest with about anything. Then all of a sudden when he turned thirty a couple of months ago he started pushing me to get married. I told him I wasn't ready that I wanted to finish graduate school and save some money, that I wanted to live in my own apartment first. Then there was the issue of his 7 year old daughter. I always liked her a lot and I love spending time with her, but I started to wonder if being a step-mom at 24 was what I really wanted to do with my life and handling all the responsibility of dealing with her real mother for next 50 years. Then the issue popped up about me wanting to move someday and my bf told me we would never move b/c of his daughter even if the circumstances made everyone life better (like a better job).

 

So then basically, I yelled at him that he was being selfish about how he was the one who needed to be married, he wanted to have another baby, he wanted to be with someone to get a house, etc, etc. So flash foward 5 days after our break up he had sex with another woman. He says he didn't mean to that it just happened, that they share everything in common and both want the same things out of life. I told him that was a dirty thing to do and that he had issues with being alone and that he disrespected our whole relationship by doing that so soon. Now he wants to be friends b/c he says I'm his best friend. That he misses telling me about his day and wondering how I am doing. He says I'm the only person he can talk to about things. And he also believes that if we were meant to be together it would just happen and it would be. I don't know what to do. I miss him a lot and I've been on other dates but it's not the same. Last time I talked to him he said he was 60% sure he wanted to be in a realtionship with me, that he wasn't sure about the other woman. And what makes me the most mad is that he wanted to be with me and marry me but he didn't want to wait, which makes me feel like I wasn't worth it in the first place. Somehow I think that would put him under the category of NOT A REAL MAN, but I can't convince myself. How do I handle the situation? Do I talk to him and if so what do I say? Any ideas?