Married and having an affair with a Married Man

[Mixedup]

God where do I start.

 

I got married a year ago to a wonderful man. We have been together now for about 6 years. I was so in love with him, worshipped him and wanted to have his children. I thought there was no one else for me. We have moved to London recently and I landed a very good job with excellent prospects. The first day I started I ran smack bang into PP, I looked straight into his eyes and could not believe the electricity, it felt like we were frozen in time.

 

Through work I got to know him a little better and found out he was married as well. He was very funny, happy and full of beans all the time. He would come into to work early and then I would come in and would so look forward to making my coffee as he was always in the kitchen around that time. I tried to get him to notice me but I thought my efforts were in vain until one night he came out for drinks with the normal crowd. While all this was going on I still did not want to start anything just enjoyed his company as a friend nothing else.

 

So of course alcohol got involved and we ended up kissing. I have no idea who started it or how it happened. I then left and he put me in a taxi, all the time thinking what have I done, I can't believe I would do this to my husband. I was a bit worried about going to work the next day but managed to get through it and all I could think about was him. He was so handsome. He managed to wangle my mobile number from me so he could text me.

 

It got to the weekend and he was texting me asking if we should get a hotel. I was really worried that he was just going to use me, he got really angry with me when I got too serious about it all. He said he was happy in his marriage and did not want to ruin it and I sad the same thing about mine. I was too deleriously happy to think of anything else so I agreed to a hotel room.

 

I have never been so nervous in my life but so excited. So to cut the story short we started seeing each other, not just for sex but for drinks, bite to eat and became close confidants. Of course my marriage started to suffer in all this as I was not spending much time at home.

 

The more time I spent with PP the worse I feel for him. After Christmas I kept trying to break it off as I new I was falling for him hard, he always managed to talk me out of it as we were in love. We planned a weekend away with each other which was the best time of my life, after this it all started going down hill. To cut to the chase it has got to this. He will not leave his wife as they have been together 14 years and he refuses to hurt her. I would do anything for this man and am hurting very badly at the thought that he does not love me enough to leave his wife and be with me.

 

He is also hurting as he wants to be with me but can't upset his family and loves his wife enough not to hurt her. I have the problem of believing him or not that he really cares for me, which everyone who reads this would say of course he doesnt he wont leave his wife. He has done so many things for me. This is not a normal affair. We spend so much time together. He is so romantic and the most genorous lover.

 

Anyway I have tried to stop contacting him, spending time with him but as we work together this is very hard. He has gone on a 11 day holiday of a lifetime safariing with his wife and I am devastated. He has been in contact with me even though I have tried not to contact him it is so very hard. I am so in love with him. He wants to continue the affair or just see me when I want to see him.

 

I can not and am so trying to get over him and am in so much pain. I know that the only thing to do is get over him and move on and try and make a life with my husband but it is so hard. I can't be intimate with my husband. I dont want to spend any time with him, we have lost touch. Recently I have been trying to get that back and we are slowly getting there but PP is constantly in my mind. I keep getting my hopes up about him. So I am not sure what I am asking people but any advice could help.

 

Thanks

[Guest]

This is a very sad story and the result of poor decision-making on both your ends.

 

You said in the beginning he chastized you for "getting too serious about it all"

 

You actually said, and I quote, "...It got to the weekend and he was texting me asking if we should get a hotel. I was really worried that he was just going to use me, he got really angry with me when I got too serious about it all"

 

 

I think that says a lot about his character.

 

What kind of person gets ANGRY at a married woman who expresses concerns about being hurt, used or wrecking her marriage?

 

He sounds very selfish.

 

He is not concerned with your welfare at all. He is concerned with what HE wants and that takes precedence over everything.

 

HE doesn't want to deal with the messy fallout of a broken marriage.

 

HE doesn't want to feel guilty.

 

HE doesn't want to give up the sexual fun he has with you.

 

HE doesn't want to give up the extra companionship you provide.

 

 

Yes, he may be a terrific lover and a generous gift-giver, but it's still all about him. He is probably very impressed with himself and his ability to keep you placated and keep the wife clueless.

 

By the way, I was friendly with a married man at a former job who not only had a mistress but also had a SECOND mistress that he saw from time to time. He said it was because the wife and first mistress 'stressed him out' with all their demands and needs.

 

Do yourself a favor; as painful as it is, try to disengage yourself from this highly destructive and toxic affair.

 

Throw away his number. Block his calls. Get yourself into therapy. Start dating single, available people.

Take a vacation of your own. Get away somewhere where you can de-stress and pamper yourself.

[JadeStar]

Which is more important to you? This other man who, probably will not leave his wife for you? Or your husband? This other man said to you he was happy with his wife, he loved her and didn't want to ruin what hes has with her. Well of course of he doesn't, he wants his cake and eat it too. He wants the comfort of his home life with the wife and you on the side. You will always play second fiddle to his wife. Is that what you want? I think you need to weigh your options here, and see whats more important to you. If you decide to break things off with this man, there needs to be no contact at all, and you and your husband need to seek marriage counseling to help you repair the damage that has already been done.

 

 

 

 

Jade

[whichwayisup]

You may think your affair is "special" or "different" than any other affair... Go read the posts by some OW (other women) in the OW/OM section as you'll find out how similar each situation is, how the MM (married man) thinks/acts/reacts. I think reading some threads will give you insight of what you're in for and what to expect if you decide to continue to allow yourself to fall deeper for PP.

 

HE is not going to leave his wife, ever. He's told you that so don't allow your feelings and clouded judgement to think he will.

 

What about your husband? Do you love him enough to come clean, tell him about the affair? Give him a chance to decide if he wants to fix the marriage, give you another chance to be his wife? It's really the only way right now. Atleast you both can go to marriage counselling and see if the marriage is worth saving.

[Mixedup]

I dont think I could tell my husband. As I said I am trying to work things out with him, it is getting better. I have changed a little in this process and feel my husband and I want different things. I will make a go of it though. I can't believe I have been this stupid to fall for someone else. This was never in my plan. I have allowed my feelings cloud everything. I thought that PP was different and he has tried to stop contacting me as well to give me my space. I just cant get this guy out of my head or heart.

[JackJack]

It wont happen overnight. It will take time to get this man out of your head, as it will to rebuild things with your husband. I don't know this for sure, but a buddy of mine went to counseling with his wife when he had an affair. The counselor told him it was crucial that he come clean and tell his wife what he had done, in order for them to truly be able to move forward. Also your husband has a right to know, so he can make up his mind what it is he really wants to do too.

[whichwayisup]

I dont think I could tell my husband. As I said I am trying to work things out with him, it is getting better. I have changed a little in this process and feel my husband and I want different things. I will make a go of it though. I can't believe I have been this stupid to fall for someone else. This was never in my plan. I have allowed my feelings cloud everything. I thought that PP was different and he has tried to stop contacting me as well to give me my space. I just cant get this guy out of my head or heart.

 

The thing is, there is a chance he can find out by someone else. That is why I said you should come clean with him. I mean, if he had an affair and it ended, would you want to know or would you rather be kept in the dark?

 

Maybe some one on one therapy will help you cope with your feelings for the other guy. You need time to get over it and realize that it was just a fantasy. As much as your heart may have loved him, realistically you never had a "real" relationship with him...It was filled with all the good stuff, not the day in, day out, daily routine and to deal with what life throws at you as a couple. It wasn't real from the start as you're both married.....

 

You tell him to stop calling you. Do not answer his calls, emails or see him, period. If possible, change your job or ask to be relocated to another division. The less you see him the less you'll feel for him, time will take of that.

 

JackJack is right and has given you some really good advice. I hope you take it to heart and figure things out.

[Mixedup]

Thank you so much for all the advice. It is good to get an outsiders perception. I think deep down I knew that it would go no where, I just kept hoping. I do like my dreams and fantasies.

 

I just have to work out whether to tell my husband or not, whether it is worth hurting him. Me personally I think I would not want to know if my husband has had an affair.

 

I know I need time to get over PP. I do not want to give up my job and I can not transfer as I love this job. I know that I need to stop replying to his emails and calls but it is so hard. I am trying anyway.

 

I was a strong woman, my friend who I have told thought me as one and can't believe what has happened to me. I am so weak and give in to PP all the time. I can't believe that I fall for all his b*llsh*t.

[whichwayisup]

I was a strong woman, my friend who I have told thought me as one and can't believe what has happened to me. I am so weak and give in to PP all the time. I can't believe that I fall for all his b*llsh*t.

 

Fix yourself first then. GO to therapy and gain back your self confidence. Find that woman you used to be. The problem is, you allowed yourself to get sucked into a very painful situation where you were made to feel awful. As good as this man may have made you felt sometimes, it was NOT REAL long lasting love. It was an intense crush, a sexual thing and you got caught up in it. The good thing is, you WANT out and you WANT to fix things. So, be strong, take it one day at a time. YOU can do this!!!

[zarathustra]

Mixedup, I would also suggest reading some of the threads in the OW/OM forum. I think reading the posts there will firm up your resolve to remove yourself from the situation as there are so many women in pain as a result of being an OW.

[Guest]

The first day I started I ran smack bang into PP, I looked straight into his eyes and could not believe the electricity, it felt like we were frozen in time.

 

 

 

So of course alcohol got involved and we ended up kissing. He managed to wangle my mobile number from me so he could text me.It got to the weekend and he was texting me asking if we should get a hotel. I was really worried that he was just going to use me, he got really angry with me when I got too serious about it all. He said he was happy in his marriage and did not want to ruin it.

 

He will not leave his wife as they have been together 14 years and he refuses to hurt her. He wants to continue the affair or just see me when I want to see him.

 

Thanks

 

Sorry to be cynical, but this sounds 'sooo romantic' and he sounds like a really great catch. Read some of the posts in the OW forum. Men like him are ten a penny in there.

 

I am sorry that you have been suckered into this. He is obviously a cake-eater. He wants his nice wife, home, family, safaris etc and he wants a thrill on the side. But you are a different case. You are letting your husband slip away and spending your time dreaming about something that is not real. Your statement 'this is not a normal affair' is telling. It sounds exactly like all the other 100s on here. I don't mean to sound cruel but I think we all know how it will end here.

 

Sylvia

[Mixedup]

See thats the whole thing I dont know whether I want out. I like this guy and I know he says all the typical things a male says when they are in this situation, I just wish I had proof that he has either done this before or just wish he would admit that he using me instead of saying he cares and wants me. uugghhh its so frustrating. But I know that the right thing to do is move on and fix myself as there is no furture with PP, even though I would love there to be.

[zarathustra]

See thats the whole thing I dont know whether I want out. I like this guy and I know he says all the typical things a male says when they are in this situation, I just wish I had proof that he has either done this before or just wish he would admit that he using me instead of saying he cares and wants me. uugghhh its so frustrating. But I know that the right thing to do is move on and fix myself as there is no furture with PP, even though I would love there to be.

 

Hence my suggestion to read the threads from the OW/OM forum. I've gone through something similar as to what you are going through and I think you will get a different perspective there.

[Sassy]

Forget about him you and he both are married. He loves his wife ,do you love your h? He isn't willing to leave his wife but your willing to leave your h . He is having his cake and eating it too why would he leave his wife? Cut your losses with this man and work on your marriage !! Your h doesn't deserve what you done to him. Come clean and maybe he will forgive you and go to counseling to deal with what you done to the marriage. CHEATING can be forgiveable if both are willing to make it work. Good luck hope it all works out for you. Please forget this MM he will never leave his wife ,and you are going to lose your h that wants to be with you !!

[tikigods]

you are being unfair to this "wonderful" man of a husband of yours. If you don't tell him then you are going to live a lie, if you do you might lose him, but it sounds like that doesn't matter much to you anyway. Divorce your husband and let him find someone that will remain faithful to him and love him

[theantibarbie23]

But I know that the right thing to do is move on and fix myself as there is no furture with PP, even though I would love there to be.

 

Regardless of if there was a future with PP or not, you need to fix yourself. The first thing you spoke of when you posted is that your husband was a wonderful person. It doesn't sound like your marriage was miserable and on the rocks and yet you chose to risk everything you had on someone who told you from the very beginning that he was never going to leave his wife for you because (during the time he was inviting you to the hotel) you thought he was handsome and were infatuated with this man.

 

You need to figure out WHY you acted in such a self-destructive manner. Why you would allow yourself to be used at the risk of harming those you loved. Realistically, you may never get back what you once had (as far as your marriage goes) but, you can figure out this puzzle so that you NEVER put yourself or someone else through this again.

 

And while I know this isn't something you even want to contemplate. Get yourself checked for STDs if you haven't already. This man could of had god knows how many affairs in the past... there are so many nasty things you can catch even using protection these days that it's a must.

 

I really hope you start healing yourself and letting this married man go. He does not respect his wife or you and will continue to eat his cake for as long as he can get away with it. You don't need someone toxic in your life, no matter how charming, romantic, or attractive they are. Good luck!

[reservoirdog1]

This is going to be blunt.

 

Tell your husband, immediately. He deserves to know. He has a right to know.

 

You say that you don't want to tell him because you don't want to hurt him. Guess what? You've already done that. He just doesn't know it yet. The person he's married to, that wonderful, honest, loving, loyal partner, is a fantasy.

 

Chances are, your husband will find out one day. These things have a way of getting out, regardless of how well you cover your tracks. And since you started cheating on him a year after you married him, if it takes several years for him to find out (or for you to confess), he will rightly feel as though his entire marriage has been a fraud.

 

Frankly, I think the real reason you don't want to tell your husband has nothing to do with not wanting to hurt him. If your goal was to not hurt him, you would have stopped the affair right after you kissed the OM the first time. I think the real reason is that you're afraid to tell him, because of what it will do to YOU.

 

You owe him honesty. As it stands, you are making his life decisions for him, and you have NO RIGHT to do that. Any decisions he makes are uninformed because you're keeping a VITAL piece of information from him. He has the right to be able to make decisions about the course of his life, armed with all the information -- even the dirty details you don't want him to know.

 

Yes, you may lose your marriage. But sometimes, that's the price. For once in this whole mess, choose to do the right thing and be honest with your husband.

[Sup]

This is going to be blunt.

 

Tell your husband, immediately. He deserves to know. He has a right to know.

 

You say that you don't want to tell him because you don't want to hurt him. Guess what? You've already done that. He just doesn't know it yet. The person he's married to, that wonderful, honest, loving, loyal partner, is a fantasy.

 

Chances are, your husband will find out one day. These things have a way of getting out, regardless of how well you cover your tracks. And since you started cheating on him a year after you married him, if it takes several years for him to find out (or for you to confess), he will rightly feel as though his entire marriage has been a fraud.

 

Frankly, I think the real reason you don't want to tell your husband has nothing to do with not wanting to hurt him. If your goal was to not hurt him, you would have stopped the affair right after you kissed the OM the first time. I think the real reason is that you're afraid to tell him, because of what it will do to YOU.

 

You owe him honesty. As it stands, you are making his life decisions for him, and you have NO RIGHT to do that. Any decisions he makes are uninformed because you're keeping a VITAL piece of information from him. He has the right to be able to make decisions about the course of his life, armed with all the information -- even the dirty details you don't want him to know.

 

Yes, you may lose your marriage. But sometimes, that's the price. For once in this whole mess, choose to do the right thing and be honest with your husband.

 

Exactly what I was thinking! You should tell Husband, it IS his choice. To be REAL here, If you Don't tell him, he'll almost surely leave you if he finds out, and BELIEVE me he will! If you you do tell him he still may leave, which in this case he has EVERY right to.

[THX2000]

This is going to be blunt.

 

Tell your husband, immediately. He deserves to know. He has a right to know.

 

You say that you don't want to tell him because you don't want to hurt him. Guess what? You've already done that. He just doesn't know it yet. The person he's married to, that wonderful, honest, loving, loyal partner, is a fantasy.

 

Chances are, your husband will find out one day. These things have a way of getting out, regardless of how well you cover your tracks. And since you started cheating on him a year after you married him, if it takes several years for him to find out (or for you to confess), he will rightly feel as though his entire marriage has been a fraud.

 

Frankly, I think the real reason you don't want to tell your husband has nothing to do with not wanting to hurt him. If your goal was to not hurt him, you would have stopped the affair right after you kissed the OM the first time. I think the real reason is that you're afraid to tell him, because of what it will do to YOU.

 

You owe him honesty. As it stands, you are making his life decisions for him, and you have NO RIGHT to do that. Any decisions he makes are uninformed because you're keeping a VITAL piece of information from him. He has the right to be able to make decisions about the course of his life, armed with all the information -- even the dirty details you don't want him to know.

 

Yes, you may lose your marriage. But sometimes, that's the price. For once in this whole mess, choose to do the right thing and be honest with your husband.

 

Truer words have not been spoken in a while with regards to this kind of thing. You aren't telling your husband to save YOURSELF the shame of anyone knowing/losing your marriage. This affair has been all about YOU from the get go so stop being selfish and tell the guy you "are so in love with" the truth. He deserves to know so he can make a choice as to whether he wants to stay in a marriage filled with deceit and lies or move on with his life.

[teressa0397]

God where do I start.

 

I got married a year ago to a wonderful man. We have been together now for about 6 years. I was so in love with him, worshipped him and wanted to have his children. I thought there was no one else for me. We have moved to London recently and I landed a very good job with excellent prospects. The first day I started I ran smack bang into PP, I looked straight into his eyes and could not believe the electricity, it felt like we were frozen in time.

 

Through work I got to know him a little better and found out he was married as well. He was very funny, happy and full of beans all the time. He would come into to work early and then I would come in and would so look forward to making my coffee as he was always in the kitchen around that time. I tried to get him to notice me but I thought my efforts were in vain until one night he came out for drinks with the normal crowd. While all this was going on I still did not want to start anything just enjoyed his company as a friend nothing else.

 

So of course alcohol got involved and we ended up kissing. I have no idea who started it or how it happened. I then left and he put me in a taxi, all the time thinking what have I done, I can't believe I would do this to my husband. I was a bit worried about going to work the next day but managed to get through it and all I could think about was him. He was so handsome. He managed to wangle my mobile number from me so he could text me.

 

It got to the weekend and he was texting me asking if we should get a hotel. I was really worried that he was just going to use me, he got really angry with me when I got too serious about it all. He said he was happy in his marriage and did not want to ruin it and I sad the same thing about mine. I was too deleriously happy to think of anything else so I agreed to a hotel room.

 

I have never been so nervous in my life but so excited. So to cut the story short we started seeing each other, not just for sex but for drinks, bite to eat and became close confidants. Of course my marriage started to suffer in all this as I was not spending much time at home.

 

The more time I spent with PP the worse I feel for him. After Christmas I kept trying to break it off as I new I was falling for him hard, he always managed to talk me out of it as we were in love. We planned a weekend away with each other which was the best time of my life, after this it all started going down hill. To cut to the chase it has got to this. He will not leave his wife as they have been together 14 years and he refuses to hurt her. I would do anything for this man and am hurting very badly at the thought that he does not love me enough to leave his wife and be with me.

 

He is also hurting as he wants to be with me but can't upset his family and loves his wife enough not to hurt her. I have the problem of believing him or not that he really cares for me, which everyone who reads this would say of course he doesnt he wont leave his wife. He has done so many things for me. This is not a normal affair. We spend so much time together. He is so romantic and the most genorous lover.

 

Anyway I have tried to stop contacting him, spending time with him but as we work together this is very hard. He has gone on a 11 day holiday of a lifetime safariing with his wife and I am devastated. He has been in contact with me even though I have tried not to contact him it is so very hard. I am so in love with him. He wants to continue the affair or just see me when I want to see him.

 

I can not and am so trying to get over him and am in so much pain. I know that the only thing to do is get over him and move on and try and make a life with my husband but it is so hard. I can't be intimate with my husband. I dont want to spend any time with him, we have lost touch. Recently I have been trying to get that back and we are slowly getting there but PP is constantly in my mind. I keep getting my hopes up about him. So I am not sure what I am asking people but any advice could help.

 

Thanks

get out of it. and move on. it will drive you crazy. leave you an pain and depressed and you will fine yourself crying. he don't want to leave his wife because he loves her. he is useing you for sex only.

stop the affair. it isnt worth it. believe me i no. i'am going threw the same pain after haveing a 12 year relationship. please please stop now.

[teressa0397]

get out of it. and move on. it will drive you crazy. leave you an pain and depressed and you will fine yourself crying. he don't want to leave his wife because he loves her. he is useing you for sex only.

stop the affair. it isnt worth it. believe me i no. i'am going threw the same pain after haveing a 12 year relationship. please please stop now.

don't tell your husband there could be a killing there. stop the affair and handle it an your own way.

[Curmudgeon]

More than just lies and deceits, there may be medical issues as well. The MM seems very practiced so who knows how many other women he's stringing along.

 

Everything she's said about him and things he's said make him sound like the perennial cakeman.

[Curmudgeon]

Well, that's one way to put a final end to it. I think that could be called "closure!"

[Mixedup]

God where do I start.

 

I got married a year ago to a wonderful man. We have been together now for about 6 years. I was so in love with him, worshipped him and wanted to have his children. I thought there was no one else for me. We have moved to London recently and I landed a very good job with excellent prospects. The first day I started I ran smack bang into PP, I looked straight into his eyes and could not believe the electricity, it felt like we were frozen in time.

 

Through work I got to know him a little better and found out he was married as well. He was very funny, happy and full of beans all the time. He would come into to work early and then I would come in and would so look forward to making my coffee as he was always in the kitchen around that time. I tried to get him to notice me but I thought my efforts were in vain until one night he came out for drinks with the normal crowd. While all this was going on I still did not want to start anything just enjoyed his company as a friend nothing else.

 

So of course alcohol got involved and we ended up kissing. I have no idea who started it or how it happened. I then left and he put me in a taxi, all the time thinking what have I done, I can't believe I would do this to my husband. I was a bit worried about going to work the next day but managed to get through it and all I could think about was him. He was so handsome. He managed to wangle my mobile number from me so he could text me.

 

It got to the weekend and he was texting me asking if we should get a hotel. I was really worried that he was just going to use me, he got really angry with me when I got too serious about it all. He said he was happy in his marriage and did not want to ruin it and I sad the same thing about mine. I was too deleriously happy to think of anything else so I agreed to a hotel room.

 

I have never been so nervous in my life but so excited. So to cut the story short we started seeing each other, not just for sex but for drinks, bite to eat and became close confidants. Of course my marriage started to suffer in all this as I was not spending much time at home.

 

The more time I spent with PP the worse I feel for him. After Christmas I kept trying to break it off as I new I was falling for him hard, he always managed to talk me out of it as we were in love. We planned a weekend away with each other which was the best time of my life, after this it all started going down hill. To cut to the chase it has got to this. He will not leave his wife as they have been together 14 years and he refuses to hurt her. I would do anything for this man and am hurting very badly at the thought that he does not love me enough to leave his wife and be with me.

 

He is also hurting as he wants to be with me but can't upset his family and loves his wife enough not to hurt her. I have the problem of believing him or not that he really cares for me, which everyone who reads this would say of course he doesnt he wont leave his wife. He has done so many things for me. This is not a normal affair. We spend so much time together. He is so romantic and the most genorous lover.

 

Anyway I have tried to stop contacting him, spending time with him but as we work together this is very hard. He has gone on a 11 day holiday of a lifetime safariing with his wife and I am devastated. He has been in contact with me even though I have tried not to contact him it is so very hard. I am so in love with him. He wants to continue the affair or just see me when I want to see him.

 

I can not and am so trying to get over him and am in so much pain. I know that the only thing to do is get over him and move on and try and make a life with my husband but it is so hard. I can't be intimate with my husband. I dont want to spend any time with him, we have lost touch. Recently I have been trying to get that back and we are slowly getting there but PP is constantly in my mind. I keep getting my hopes up about him. So I am not sure what I am asking people but any advice could help.

 

Thanks

 

Well I have thought a lot since everybodys replies and yes I know I should tell my husband. I know he deserves a much better person then me. This is why I am going to leave him. I am just not happy and I can not give him what he wants. The existing sex problem was there before I had an affair. I just can't make love to him. I don't think I am sexually attracted to him anymore. Shall I give it more time and can you get things back on track, I dont know. I am trying to get over PP and this is soooooo hard. I am more hurt that PP does not want me.

[whichwayisup]

Well I have thought a lot since everybodys replies and yes I know I should tell my husband. I know he deserves a much better person then me. This is why I am going to leave him. I am just not happy and I can not give him what he wants. The existing sex problem was there before I had an affair. I just can't make love to him. I don't think I am sexually attracted to him anymore. Shall I give it more time and can you get things back on track, I dont know. I am trying to get over PP and this is soooooo hard. I am more hurt that PP does not want me.

 

You haven't given it a chance to see if the marriage will work! End things completely with PP, go to one on one therapy to get over your feelings for him and THEN atleast TRY to fix your marriage. If you walk away without even trying you could regret that later in life.

 

I think the feelings you have for your husband are there, but they're buried and the intense crush-like feelings you have for PP have taken over. You're much more intune and emotionally attached to PP than to your husband.

 

Sit and think about when you met your husband. When you two first started dating. All the good stuff. That love you feel for him IS inside you...Just got to go find it again.