KittenMoon Posted April 18, 2006 Posted April 18, 2006 My ex just emailed me. I'll share with you all: Subject: "hey" Body: "hey" I had just gotten off the phone with my mom, crying again at how completely mental he was acting, and this just seals it. I immediatly called her back and said "I'm going to KILL him". What the heck and hell does this crap mean??!!!!!
2sunny Posted April 18, 2006 Posted April 18, 2006 Where do you live? Here on the west coast it just simply means hi! Kind of like hi, how's it going? Still usually involves the other person to respond though, without it being said ....
My_Other_I Posted April 18, 2006 Posted April 18, 2006 Trying to initate contact and keep the door open. He really doesn't have anything to say but he wants to remind you of him self. Jerk. Can you put his email address on block/ignore list?
Pyro Posted April 18, 2006 Posted April 18, 2006 A simple "hey", to me means that maybe he is not sure if you want to have a conversation with him. He is saying "hi, how are you doing" from a distance. It is the simplest way to attempt to talk to you. The ball is in your court now. I wouldn't respond.
whichwayisup Posted April 18, 2006 Posted April 18, 2006 Hey means, Hi, hello, how's it going...It's a greeting. That's all, plain and simple.
Author KittenMoon Posted April 18, 2006 Author Posted April 18, 2006 A simple "hey", to me means that maybe he is not sure if you want to have a conversation with him. He is saying "hi, how are you doing" from a distance. It is the simplest way to attempt to talk to you. The ball is in your court now. I wouldn't respond. You're prob right. It pisses me off though. When we split, I asked him to email me from time to time, let me know how he's doing. Like "Hi, I had a job interview today, my sister got into med school, hope you're ok, etc". Innocous info that let me know he was ok but didn't do things like expect me to respond, give me hope, or tell me about any new girls in his life. This just pisses me off. You don't email "hey". Maybe you IM it, but email is not like passing someone on the street!!!!!! Arg. He's going to drive me insane. I shouldn't respond, but I probably will. Probably just with: "Hey". See how he likes it...
Pyro Posted April 18, 2006 Posted April 18, 2006 You're prob right. It pisses me off though. When we split, I asked him to email me from time to time, let me know how he's doing. Like "Hi, I had a job interview today, my sister got into med school, hope you're ok, etc". Innocous info that let me know he was ok but didn't do things like expect me to respond, give me hope, or tell me about any new girls in his life. This just pisses me off. You don't email "hey". Maybe you IM it, but email is not like passing someone on the street!!!!!! Arg. He's going to drive me insane. I shouldn't respond, but I probably will. Probably just with: "Hey". See how he likes it... If contacting your ex is going to give you any negative feeling, then you shouldn't respond. The most important thing right now is to better yourself. Knock out of your life anything that may bring you down.
Author KittenMoon Posted April 18, 2006 Author Posted April 18, 2006 If contacting your ex is going to give you any negative feeling, then you shouldn't respond. The most important thing right now is to better yourself. Knock out of your life anything that may bring you down. This is tough. I will probably respond. No, I know I will. But unless he's got something REAL to say, I gotta let him know he can't contact me like this. That anything he says to me has got to be innocuous ("Hey, I'm moving to Cleveland, here's my number for emergencies", etc..). He's not playing mind games, he just doesn't GET IT. Serious emotions and empathy are a mostly undiscovered frontier for him. I doubt he grasps how every little thing he says or does effects me.
blind_otter Posted April 18, 2006 Posted April 18, 2006 Hay is for horses. Cows eat grass. If you don't like it. You can kiss my ass. how about that.
sick of it Posted April 18, 2006 Posted April 18, 2006 listen....please dont email him. nothing good can come of it....mayb nothing bad but definitley nothing good. theres no point in responding. you dont mean "hey" back if you type that. Youre doing it kind of out of spite. its not worth it to be sucked into anything. just dont.
Author KittenMoon Posted April 18, 2006 Author Posted April 18, 2006 listen....please dont email him. nothing good can come of it....mayb nothing bad but definitley nothing good. theres no point in responding. you dont mean "hey" back if you type that. Youre doing it kind of out of spite. its not worth it to be sucked into anything. just dont. You're right, nothing good will come of it. In fact, I'm probably going to be disappointed and hurt again. I don't know, I'm going to think about it some more. Damn, I wish I wasn't so confused...
sick of it Posted April 18, 2006 Posted April 18, 2006 i emplore you not to respond. I got the same kind of message. she dumped me and wanted to know how i was. i called back and found out things i never wanted to know. i called with an expectation of her caring. i was wrong and felt horrible. dealing with the "what would he want" is better than dealing with the horrible things he could say or way you could feel if you found something out. NC= No new hurts
alphamale Posted April 18, 2006 Posted April 18, 2006 I immediatly called her back and said "I'm going to KILL him".!!!!! both of you may be acting "mental", not just him
jerbear Posted April 18, 2006 Posted April 18, 2006 My ex just emailed me. I'll share with you all: Subject: "hey" Body: "hey" I had just gotten off the phone with my mom, crying again at how completely mental he was acting, and this just seals it. I immediatly called her back and said "I'm going to KILL him". What the heck and hell does this crap mean??!!!!! Delete and Ignore him. Now if you really have a deep desire to respond, I suggest this: Subject: "yo!" Body: "yo!"
Author KittenMoon Posted April 18, 2006 Author Posted April 18, 2006 both of you may be acting "mental", not just him Honestly, he's really acting mental. And I'm not really going to kill him, he's just been really hot/cold through this. Ignoring our friends, then suddenly opening up to them emotionally in a way he's never done, and then back to complete lack of contact again. Being cold and callous to me and then humbling himself. He's going through SOMETHING. An early life-crisis, or possibly an unrealized bout of depression. Realize that I'm fighting very hard not to be there for him, as I would be there for any friend. My instincts have always been to help others, make things better, etc. I'm fighting a core part of myself. I told my mom a few times that it's been, both at the end of the relationship and in the months since the breakup, like having a teenager. One minute he's angry and cold and mean, then the next he's trying to make it up, be good, be nice. Still thinking, thinking....
sick of it Posted April 18, 2006 Posted April 18, 2006 last time...dont..ignore it. if theres something important to say, he'll say it.
Author KittenMoon Posted April 18, 2006 Author Posted April 18, 2006 last time...dont..ignore it. if theres something important to say, he'll say it. true dat... been telling myself this for weeks. Except (shush, I hear the groans) I asked him to email me occasionally, I'm pissed off he may have misinterpreted this. Part of me really wants to make myself clear.
alphamale Posted April 18, 2006 Posted April 18, 2006 he's just been really hot/cold through this. Ignoring our friends, then suddenly opening up to them emotionally in a way he's never done, and then back to complete lack of contact again. Being cold and callous to me and then humbling himself. One minute he's angry and cold and mean, then the next he's trying to make it up, be good, be nice.... So what KM??? That the way men are. His behaviour is totally normal.
Author KittenMoon Posted April 18, 2006 Author Posted April 18, 2006 So what KM??? That the way men are. His behaviour is totally normal. Men are crazy. If you didn't smell nice, hug me, and have d*cks, I'd hate you all.
Chinook Posted April 18, 2006 Posted April 18, 2006 I wouldn't respond at all. He hasn't said anything of value. No news. No update. All he has done is confirm his email address is still active. No better than spam in my opinion. Should be treated in the exact same way.
Vertex Posted April 18, 2006 Posted April 18, 2006 He's just trying to initiate contact but is afraid to open up a new can of worms, but since the ball's in your court now, you have the power. Personally I wouldn't give it back to him. Let him wonder why you didn't respond -- it might get him thinking. Responding will only keep the link between you two open and allow for more hurt.
Author KittenMoon Posted April 18, 2006 Author Posted April 18, 2006 He's just trying to initiate contact but is afraid to open up a new can of worms, but since the ball's in your court now, you have the power. Personally I wouldn't give it back to him. Let him wonder why you didn't respond -- it might get him thinking. Responding will only keep the link between you two open and allow for more hurt. I don't feel like I have any power. Or worse, I feel like decisions, like whether to contact or not, are being forced on me. I feel backed into a corner. Which is the same way I felt before we broke up, and then when he basically forced me to end it. It makes me so sad cause I miss him... but he really needs to grow up and finally GET IT.
lexilas Posted April 18, 2006 Posted April 18, 2006 KittenMoondon't feel like I have any power. Or worse, I feel like decisions, like whether to contact or not, are being forced on me. I feel backed into a corner. Which is the same way I felt before we broke up, and then when he basically forced me to end it. It makes me so sad cause I miss him... but he really needs to grow up and finally GET IT. Have you healed any since you broke up? If so, don't contact him - you'll only set yourself back. If he had anything of significance to say - he would have said it instead of "hey".
Author KittenMoon Posted April 18, 2006 Author Posted April 18, 2006 KittenMoon Have you healed any since you broke up? I don't know. I'm always either sad or confused. Or lonely- I miss having someone to talk about random daily stuff with. But mostly confused. Is this anywhere near healing?
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