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Posted

Okay well now I'm in the healing process of my exgirlfriend and my relationship. I'm at a point where for the most time I'm happy and don't care about things, the next minute I'm not.

I still care about her, but know I have to move on. I have mostly NC'ed, kind of hard since we go to the same school. We had to go to this convention thing for leadership, and she was there. I just sort of brushed her off, smiled if she looked at me and waved to her, etc. Kept conversations short, and talked to her family briefly.

But I can't stand what I start to think sometimes, when I think about reality. She's out there with another guy, who was my friend, and who knows what they're doing together. That's what kills me. That, what we had, is being replaced with what she has with her new guy.

I don't know how to feel, I want to be happy but she doesn't even try to call or anything. She doesn't try to make things better and is fine knowing how bad I'm hurting about it.

I feel like I just want to hate her, but hate is too strong. And at the same time, I love her.

I'm just a bit confused.

Posted

you dont want her to call. you may think you do, the idea is nice, but if she did, your head would fill with thoughts and ideas that will keep you down. she knows how much youre hurting but she cant make things better. thats why she doesnt say anything.

im the same way about thinking about what theyre doing. it hurts. it may always will. if you talk to her, you will find things out that you dont want to. NC= No new hurting. hang in there. it will take a while but dont give in. we're all here for you.

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Posted

Well I don't want her to call and talk but the fact that she doesn't even try makes me think she doesn't even care.

And I don't think she knows how bad I feel, I told her I was better off without her now so she wouldn't have to worry about me. I thought it was the right thing to say, and for the most part, I mean it. When I'm not thinking about her, I'm having a better time than I did with her when we were together.

You're right though, I need to completely NC. I need to stop expecting to see her with her new boyfriend wherever I go or expect her to call or anything. It's just tough..

Posted

and it will be tough for a while. it will be a fear to see them. you will constantly be anxious. dont think its strange that you feel that way, its normal.

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