Delectable Posted May 4, 2006 Posted May 4, 2006 I saw Paris Hilton the other day and, honestly, she's just rediculous. My friend and I couldn't stop laughing at her. Any guy that's attracted to that, you don't want. I'm an event planner and see Paris quite regularly...and you are correct. She is a trainwreck. Horrible...and so is her 'frame'
Walk Posted May 4, 2006 Posted May 4, 2006 Flawed logic. If A then B, doesn't mean, If C then D. That was a study that clearly stated that women tend to perform worse, when they feel self-conscious. Um, this isn't a controlled research study. This was an article in a pop psychology magazine that is, if anything, closer to a research review of multiple studies, rather than a scientific paper. I'm sorry B_O.. I was actually going to state it as an honest question, then thought you'd think I was retarded, so rephrased to make fun of it. The math thing was a joke. I know I'm a stuttering retard when I feel self-conscious. I'd hate to attempt classes wearing a two piece. I felt like it would increase her confidence, but WHATEVER. God forbid I try to make someone feel good. She better friggin' read that article because I wanted to hear her opinion!! Go read it CatGirl!!!! It's a good article. And then let me know what you think... I'm just jaded 'cause I don't worry so much how I look like I used to, and I worry it's because I know I'm not able to compete with the hotties. Which irritates me. So DON'T listen to me on this. Listen to B_O.
catgirl1927 Posted May 4, 2006 Posted May 4, 2006 And then let me know what you think... I'm just jaded 'cause I don't worry so much how I look like I used to, and I worry it's because I know I'm not able to compete with the hotties. Which irritates me. So DON'T listen to me on this. Listen to B_O. GIRL. You are SO in my head. This is something that bugs me all the time!! My BF is all, quit worrying about it, there will always be SOMEONE who is better looking. And my mind says, so I'm the dog in this scenario and so I should just give up because I can't look good!!! Wow. You have NO idea how nice it is to hear someone else say that. And, you were able to verbalize what I was really feeling when I couldn't. Yay. Next time it comes up I will be able to tell my BF what I'm feeling in a way he will understand and I won't seem AS crazy... I will try to get to read the article today. I read some of the school article, it sounds really cool.
kitten chick Posted May 4, 2006 Posted May 4, 2006 Ugh, sometimes I can't even go out in public because of it. Why do we have to deal with this crap?
catgirl1927 Posted May 4, 2006 Posted May 4, 2006 Ugh, sometimes I can't even go out in public because of it. Why do we have to deal with this crap? I don't know. It's crippling though. I have to put on a bathing suit for a lake trip in June. Even if I lose 15 lbs, which I should be fine doing, I will still be all pale. I get sick to my stomach just thinking about it.
kitten chick Posted May 4, 2006 Posted May 4, 2006 I don't know. It's crippling though. It really is. No matter how hard I try I can't lose the weight. There are only so many miles one can run in a week. It really sucks, it keeps me from doing so many things including relationships...let's not even talk about putting on a bathing suit. You're pretty brave, it's not something I can do anymore.
catgirl1927 Posted May 4, 2006 Posted May 4, 2006 It really is. No matter how hard I try I can't lose the weight. There are only so many miles one can run in a week. It really sucks, it keeps me from doing so many things including relationships...let's not even talk about putting on a bathing suit. You're pretty brave, it's not something I can do anymore. I'm not going to preach, but have you tried WW? Wait, the first question I should ask is whether you really think you need to lose weight or are you like me where every pound drives you insane? And you might try weights or resistance exercises. I found a tankini that is adorable and I'll wear a skirt over it. I also really need a hat, now that I don't tan I want to keep the sun off my face. So technically it's a bathing suit. For the most part...
kitten chick Posted May 4, 2006 Posted May 4, 2006 I'm not going to preach, but have you tried WW? Wait, the first question I should ask is whether you really think you need to lose weight or are you like me where every pound drives you insane? And you might try weights or resistance exercises. I found a tankini that is adorable and I'll wear a skirt over it. I also really need a hat, now that I don't tan I want to keep the sun off my face. So technically it's a bathing suit. For the most part... I tried WW when I was younger. I know a lot about health and eating properly and I do eat very well. I've consulted before and everyone seems to agree there's not too much more I can do. I run and do weights (strength training). I've tried everything there is to try, I'm out of options. That's good that you found something to wear, I guess I can try to find something similar, I just feel silly wearing long skirts or wraps to the beach. I don't know how you're able to even let your boyfriend see you. How do you do that? Do you just never get undressed infront of him or are the lights always out?
catgirl1927 Posted May 4, 2006 Posted May 4, 2006 I tried WW when I was younger. I know a lot about health and eating properly and I do eat very well. I've consulted before and everyone seems to agree there's not too much more I can do. I run and do weights (strength training). I've tried everything there is to try, I'm out of options. That's good that you found something to wear, I guess I can try to find something similar, I just feel silly wearing long skirts or wraps to the beach. I don't know how you're able to even let your boyfriend see you. How do you do that? Do you just never get undressed infront of him or are the lights always out? Ok, as one crazy person to another, I bet you a dollar that you look just fine and are too hard on yourself. The lights are usually out. I don't let him see me often but sometimes he surprises me. He likes to come in the bathroom and pull my towel off and scream "Boobies!!!". He's so sweet.
kitten chick Posted May 4, 2006 Posted May 4, 2006 The lights are usually out. I don't let him see me often but sometimes he surprises me. He likes to come in the bathroom and pull my towel off and scream "Boobies!!!". He's so sweet. Tender moments Ok, as one crazy person to another, I bet you a dollar that you look just fine and are too hard on yourself. Yes, I'm crazy, Yes I'm too hard on myself...no I don't look ok. I even tried CBT to help with my image issues and it didn't work. In a way that's kind of what that article was trying to teach.
TeaCooler Posted May 4, 2006 Posted May 4, 2006 Ugh, sometimes I can't even go out in public because of it. Why do we have to deal with this crap? boohoo, sometimes i can't even go out in public with my "big boobs and blonde hair and perfect complexion." you're lying, looking for attention, or both. sorry, i have a problem with people who use complaining as a way to brag or pseudo-brag, especially when it's nothing worth bragging over. and i have lots of blonde friends, so i'm not picking on all blondes...but my hair is as black as the night and i don't have any issues with shine or getting attention from guys. sometimes, especially when it's not taken care of, blonde hair can look scraggly and unclean. it also depends on the shade of blonde. some are absolutely beeeeee-yooooo-tiful. not that these two things are my goal; i'm engaged and yes it's nice to have shiny hair, but you know. just throwing in my 02 like all ya'll.
catgirl1927 Posted May 4, 2006 Posted May 4, 2006 Yes, I'm crazy, Yes I'm too hard on myself...no I don't look ok. I even tried CBT to help with my image issues and it didn't work. In a way that's kind of what that article was trying to teach. You and I are SO the same. We'll just have to encourage each other, because I know nothing anyone says ever makes me feel better about the way that I look. It's nice to know that people care that I'm sad and don't want me to be, though.
kitten chick Posted May 4, 2006 Posted May 4, 2006 You and I are SO the same. We'll just have to encourage each other, because I know nothing anyone says ever makes me feel better about the way that I look. It's nice to know that people care that I'm sad and don't want me to be, though. Sounds good catgirl. I liked your bathing suit tip. I wish there was an easy answer for both of us. I'll PM you about it.
NightsInWhiteSatin Posted May 4, 2006 Posted May 4, 2006 I think the media plays everyone off against eachother in magazines, tv etc the whole 'blonde bimbo thing' etc Making out brunettes to be dull and intelligent and blondes out to be bimbos and dumb and red heds to be firey and bad tempered....what happens when we're all going grey and white...what catagory do we fit in then??? I have dirty blonde hair and big boobs...my two sisters are the same...people make comments to us all the time trying to be-little us trying to make us out as dumb and dizzy girls who can't do anything for ourselves...men make assumptions that we're easy to get in bed and 'up for it'. I've had guys say in front of me that they would'nt be interested in dating blondes because they want non-superficial intelligent women....how dare people make assumptions like that? It's not just blondes who get stick it's brunettes too, my best mate a beautiful brunette and i were in a pub we were approached by two guys who were both 'trying' to chat me up and i was sat there thinking whats going on why isn't one of them interested in my friend she's gorgeous...a while later they started making comments like 'oh aye i love a blonde me, much more fun than the rest etc' it was just stupid and so frustrating i'm the quietest person ever i'm no fun to people who i don't know and my friend is the bubbliest person with anyone and everyone she meets but they weren't interested in her because of hair colour how pathetic is that. yeah i've had my rant hehe going for a walk tiz sunny!
catgirl1927 Posted May 4, 2006 Posted May 4, 2006 Yeah, it's like if you have brown hair you're not shallow because you aren't pretty. Blondes get to be shallow and dumb because they're pretty enough to get away with it. It breeds this competition between blondes and brunettes and pits us against each other. We must fight this division!!!
jerbear Posted May 4, 2006 Posted May 4, 2006 Kittenchick: I think you will be fine, I like you the way you are. big small or whatever. I like them whatever size, but blonde hair is nice. I'm asian and have black hair. Oh well... Honestly my views are, sometimes it is to big or small, not my body and one has to love someone for who they are physically, mentally, and who they will be oneday. One can catch my eye but it is personality that keeps it. No not boobies or boob tube.
TeaCooler Posted May 4, 2006 Posted May 4, 2006 Yeah, it's like if you have brown hair you're not shallow because you aren't pretty. Blondes get to be shallow and dumb because they're pretty enough to get away with it. It breeds this competition between blondes and brunettes and pits us against each other. We must fight this division!!! i think it may be statements like the one you posted that causes this "division."
catgirl1927 Posted May 4, 2006 Posted May 4, 2006 i think it may be statements like the one you posted that causes this "division." I didn't mean it to be that way. I meant that society kind of tells us it's that way, but we know intellectually that it's ridiculous. I've been blonde and brunette, fat and skinny, small boobs and big boobs. I've been treated like I must be smart and sweet and like I must be a dumb whore. I've had it both ways, and through it all I was the same person inside. It's just so stupid.
Guest Posted May 4, 2006 Posted May 4, 2006 It just goes to show that women will use anything to have an inferiority complex. If it's not their fat ass, or huge thighs, it's their hair color. I rarely see women with dark hair bitching about how everyone takes them too seriously and they are not allowed to be shallow or superficial. I have, however, since I began socializing with women early in my life, noticed that there is a subset of women with blond hair (not all, but a subset) that is obsessive about their own perceived inferiorities. Absurdly enough few of the women in this subset seem to be aware that there's something called self fulfilling prophecy. When a grown woman is crying about how no one takes her seriously, it begs the question -- does she really demand that people take her seriously, and is it the entirety of society that has the issue??
kitten chick Posted May 4, 2006 Posted May 4, 2006 Thanks jerbear, that was nice of you. You have to understand that when someone has a distorted body image it doesn't really matter what you say to them, they don't believe it themselves. They don't see themselves the way other people see them. I'm not self conscious about my hair or it's color, just my body, and I've rarely been mistaken for an unintelligent individual as the first questions people generally ask when they meet you is where you work or where you went to school. I don't think that people see the blonde hair and think bimbo, but then again I don't know what's going on in everyone's heads. Now being a woman, regardless of hair color, in corporate america, that's a whole other issue. Catgirl, if I can offer you a piece of advice. Put TeaCooler/RainyDayWoman on ignore, she never has anything less than bitchy to say.
Walk Posted May 4, 2006 Posted May 4, 2006 I'm really curious as to what the two of you look like. Catgirl and Kitten chick. I'll post a pic of me, if the two of you will post yours for the day. Or a few hours. Then you can switch it back. Would you?
reservoirdog1 Posted May 4, 2006 Posted May 4, 2006 First things first: Paris Hilton looks like a scrawny cokehead. Pamela Anderson comes closer to my ideal (insofar as she has hips and boobs) but her appearance is very manufactured and phony. As for what I look for, I'm a total sucker for the "girl next door" type. I totally agree with whoever said it above -- the kind of woman whose appearance when she's fresh out of the shower turns me on. Not quite ten years ago, I worked for a financial services company. One of the back office employees was a girl about 26, who literally dressed like a streetwalker. She was skinny, wore hooker heels, had disproportionately big boobs (obviously enhanced), heavily made up, long curly hair. Looked like something out of a porno. Wondered why they let her dress like that... no, scratch that. I know why. Anyway, I always wondered a bit what SHE'D look like fresh out of the shower, and usually pictured an emaciated drowned rat with big cans.
kitten chick Posted May 4, 2006 Posted May 4, 2006 I don't have any issues with my face, just my body and all of the pictures I have since I gained weight are shoulders up.
Walk Posted May 4, 2006 Posted May 4, 2006 Anyway, I always wondered a bit what SHE'D look like fresh out of the shower, and usually pictured an emaciated drowned rat with big cans. OMG that's too funny!!!!!! They've done studies that show men actually prefer the type of woman that most woman would say was fat. Curvy with some meat on her bones. But we women buy into that supermodel boyish look so heavily that we can't just be happy with being curvy. Our legs gotta look like sticks, and our tummy's like washboards. I had this philosophy back in my 20's that as long as I had a great body then men would want me. Cause you can have the face of a dog, but if you have a great body it really doesn't matter. But if you don't have the body, and your dog faced, then your loveless forever.... It's since changed, but sometimes I still fall back into that. A lot less now then I used to though. Guess partly that was because real life showed me that men aren't talking the same kind of beauty that women are talking about. Vastly different views between the sexes.
Walk Posted May 4, 2006 Posted May 4, 2006 I don't have any issues with my face, just my body and all of the pictures I have since I gained weight are shoulders up. Spoil sport. I still wanted to see what you looked like.. That's okay though. Don't worry about it.
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