sunnie23 Posted April 11, 2006 Posted April 11, 2006 anyone who has read my past posts knows i'm dealing with anxiety and other issues right now when it comes to my relationship. I've started counselling and things are going much , much better. My therapist thinks that my behaviour in a relationship is directly caused by the fact that my father left my mother when she was pregnant - leaving me with extremely low self worth and a tremendous fear of abandonment. so that's where i'm at now. here's what i need your advice on. ever since i started therapy things with my bf have been amazing. i've been more secure and have put myself out there a lot more then i was, and he's doing the same (he doesn't know i am seeing anyone about this though). The past week has been amazing. He even came with me on Sunday to dinner at my biological father's house and met my Father and half-sisters. i think that by letting him that deep into my life he's much more secure now, as he's been a lot more attentive and tender with me the past couple of days. there's something he said a couple of weeks ago thought, that i just can't get out of my head. we went out for dinner and things were very uncomfortable. i was feeling extremely insecure and was thinking about ending things just to put myself out of the misery that comes with worrying about losing something 24/7. we drove by a hooters and we joked about going there for dinner. then he said, "you should get a job there" (i'm fairly well endowed in that area). i told him i did not go to university for four years to work there, and he replied "whats wrong with working there? my ex girlfriend worked there, seriously, whats wrong with that" i dont know why but this hurt my feelings - i just looked at him for a minute and replied "why would i want to wear a tiny top and short shorts and show my *** to everyone in there?" i was pretty close to crying - i think he could tell. he just laughed uncomfortably and we went on with our night. at the end of the night i was completely prepared to end things. but i didn't. and like i said, i went to see a therapist (who i will be seeing regularly from now on) and have seen things (our relationship, him) in a different light ever since...today i feel like i really love him and am just afraid - but memories like that night are whats keeping me from showing my feelings to him. can i chalk that night, and that conversation up to me and my issues? was he trying to tell me something? am i being over-analytical here?
blind_otter Posted April 11, 2006 Posted April 11, 2006 can i chalk that night, and that conversation up to me and my issues? was he trying to tell me something? am i being over-analytical here? I think you're being overly analytical. That's just my take. Maybe he was puzzled that you think less of the women who work there and just sincerely wanted to know what was wrong with working there? Bring this up with your T. Also, why are you hiding your therapeutic process from your BF?
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