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Posted

I've had a male best friend since childhood and to make a long story short, we became a couple in college, moved in together, broke up, became friends with benefits and broke up again. The last time we were together was in January and he had a girlfriend at the time. We decided to stop seeing each other and he stayed with his girlfriend. I tried to contiune spending time with him and his girlfriend for as long as I could, which didn't last long. We still talked on the phone ever once in while, but we hadn't seen each other in over a month until he called me Friday night.

 

Apparently things aren't going so well with his girlfriend and he is

thinking about breaking up with her. It was totally against the rules

we set when we broke up, but he needed a friend and I really wanted to

see him, so he came over. We talked, watched a movie and just hung out.

He ended up spending the night, but nothing happened, we just slept. We

spent all Saturday together and when he left he still wasn't sure what

he was going to do about his girlfriend. He told me she expects him to

buy her gift after gift but never gives him anything. Like for

valentine's day, he spent 300 dollars on her and she didn't give him a

thing. He said she's become unavailable and difficult. I think she's

using him. I didn't know what to tell him, I couldn't say break up with

her 'cause that would make me sound like the jealous ex-girlfriend.

 

Anyway, as he was leaving he asked if he could come back again. I

didn't think it was a good idea. I mean I loved having him here, it was

really nice to spend time together and not having to sleep alone but I

don't want to make a habit out of him spending the night. We both know

where that would lead and if things aren't going to change I don't even

want to go in that direction again. Even though I feel this way, I

still found myself telling him, maybe.

 

I'm trying to be smart about this. I want to be a good friend, but I

have this strange feeling that we are going to end up right back where

we were. I didn't dare tell him that I might be moving to Florida in

January. His biggest fear when we were dating was that I would move. My

whole family lives down there and he knows how much I much I've wanted

to go for years. Now I finally have the opportunity to go with a great

job offer and I really think I'm going to take it. It's too good to

pass up. If we were still together, I'd ask him to come with me. I have

no idea how I'm going to tell him. I have no idea how I'm going to deal

wih this. I thought it was hard not seeing him now, where I drive past

his job and house 4 times a day just to see his car. How am I going to

deal in Florida? I just don't know how to deal with this man in my life

anymore. I can't live with him and I can't live without him.

 

Any advice would be great. Thanks.

Posted

Why don't you ignore him.

Posted

Many people advice a no connection as this will most likly help you get over him. I think its something consider trying out. If you move to Florida then it will be good for you to get over him because when you are out there you may meet someone else.

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