coasting Posted April 7, 2006 Posted April 7, 2006 Here I am again....crying like a fool and wondering what i ever did to deserve the bull I am in right now. All's I ever di was love the guy with my entire being.....and nothing anyone can say or do can change that feeling....I want to get angry with him but I can't, because i do not want to see him in pain....I know he doesn't care that i am in pain but two wrongs do not make a right....I think if I were able to get angry I would be doing so much better...How does one make themself angry at the person they love with all of their heart?
luvtoto Posted April 8, 2006 Posted April 8, 2006 I think if I were able to get angry I would be doing so much better Getting angry at him and blowing up is not going to make you feel better, whisnimz. It may make you feel worse. There is no easy answer for curing a broken-heart. Trust me!! I've been in your shoes before. You are not alone. Sometimes, things just don't work out... no matter how hard we want it too. If you *do* want to get angry, do it when you are alone or with friend. Write a letter and do not send it. You need to get these feelings out of you. If you blow up at him to his face, this will make you feel much, much worse.
Craig Posted April 8, 2006 Posted April 8, 2006 No reason to get angry. If you love your ex with all your heart then you should be happy for him making the decision he did.
Curmudgeon Posted April 8, 2006 Posted April 8, 2006 You're either angry or you're not. It's not something you "make" yourself do and I'd advise against it. Go ahead and hurt. The end of any relationship requires both a grief process and a healing process. Crying's OK too!
Author coasting Posted April 8, 2006 Author Posted April 8, 2006 i do not want to angry directly at him...i just need to get angry to let these feelings go....to be able to look at him and realize what he is, and that maybe he did me a favor.......but I just can't do it yet....you would think the second time around wouldbe easier then the first but it sucks....... Craig...how can Ibe happy for the decision he made, when it involves another person he was cheatingon me with? I know he does not deserve my love but love is not something you can just throw the brakes on.
Craig Posted April 8, 2006 Posted April 8, 2006 Craig...how can Ibe happy for the decision he made, when it involves another person he was cheatingon me with? I know he does not deserve my love but love is not something you can just throw the brakes on. Ah, sorry I didn't realize that he cheated on you. But he did you a favor by cheating now and getting found out. It saves you even more grief in the long run. You will get angry, very angry it just takes some time for the anger to appear. How long have you been broken up and known about his cheating? If the answer is not long, then you are definitely not to the anger stage yet. Try googling the "stages of a breakup" for more reading material. Be strong.
luvtoto Posted April 8, 2006 Posted April 8, 2006 i do not want to angry directly at him...i just need to get angry to let these feelings go....to be able to look at him and realize what he is, and that maybe he did me a favor.......but I just can't do it yet....you would think the second time around wouldbe easier then the first but it sucks....... Sounds like you are exactly where I was about 5 yrs ago. I am so sorry for you. When it happened to me, I opted for the revenge tactic. I wasted a year out of my life trying everything in my power to screw things up for him. Succeeded a couple times. But, in the end, I was only hurting myself. I remember having soooooo much rage inside of me. I remember someone telling me that I didn't have any coping skills. Not enough to deal with what was happening. I joined a support group and things got better. Time is your only friend right now. It's just gonna take time to get past all this hurt & shock. Looking back on it now, I wish I would have never given that man one ounce of my pain. He was not worth it. Those two cheaters deserve each other.. he was lucky to have you. A guy like that.. no one is gonna make him happy.
Author coasting Posted April 8, 2006 Author Posted April 8, 2006 First break up happened on November 19, 2005 and I allowed him back into my life on march 8 2006, but then he decided he was in love with me, but also loved her nad left on march 30, 2006.....I have postings all over LS
Craig Posted April 8, 2006 Posted April 8, 2006 First break up happened on November 19, 2005 and I allowed him back into my life on march 8 2006, but then he decided he was in love with me, but also loved her and left on march 30, 2006.....I have postings all over LS I'd say you're still in a little shock and the reality of it all hasn't sunk in yet. Maintain the NC and get on with your life as much as you can. The anger will come.
Author coasting Posted April 8, 2006 Author Posted April 8, 2006 I hope so but somehow I doubt it as I have said I do not want to see him in pain....the other woman maybe, but not him....and I know he is to blame but I guess right now I am just bitter towards her for not only being with my man, but also for allowing him back in after he cmae back here to me.....Does this make sense?
Craig Posted April 8, 2006 Posted April 8, 2006 I hope so but somehow I doubt it as I have said I do not want to see him in pain....the other woman maybe, but not him....and I know he is to blame but I guess right now I am just bitter towards her for not only being with my man, but also for allowing him back in after he came back here to me.....Does this make sense? Of course it makes sense...you are normal. Your emotions, feelings, thoughts, etc. are going to undergo some changes in the near future. Accept where you are emotionally and it will be a little easier (not easy, just easier.)
fooled Posted April 8, 2006 Posted April 8, 2006 Oh, you will get angry. Right now you're in shock and pain. The anger will come. Oh yes...the anger will come. This was about 5 weeks after the break up. http://www.loveshack.org/forums/t81797/
Author coasting Posted April 8, 2006 Author Posted April 8, 2006 great post there fooled.....I can only hope the anger will come as it really never did during the first break up...Like I said I am just angry with my self for being so stupid and giving him another chance to break my heart all over again.....I did however get a chuckle tonight...I was on the phone with a girlfriend and i watched a flatbed go by with his vehicle on it....that sucks it must have broke down and he just doesn't have the money to pay to get it fixed.....I am sure he will be looking around and I will be more then happy to say I don't think so!!!!!!!
Brittanyjean06 Posted April 9, 2006 Posted April 9, 2006 I too had that problem with( ex now) a bf of mine, He could care less about seeing me in pain, but when it was the other way around, I coulden't handel it.????? weird
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